Is this sleeping arrangement for ds unfair?

That poster knew full well the sides were still on OP, it was pretty obvious from your post. The poster was attempting to shame you, because only in the world of mumsnet are all toddlers dry at night by 3.5🙄

I would take the sides off now, I had sides on for my DC until 3 and really didn’t want to take them off as they were comfy and had never tried to climb, but once a child reaches 35” in height it’s no longer safe for them to have the sides on a cot. So, if your child is approaching or over that height, you should probably take the sides off sooner rather than later.
Good luck. It won’t be anywhere near as stressful as you think it might be.

Every child is completely different. Do whatever works for you and your little one. I waited for a house move as well, and it's not relevant but we found adapting to toddler beds really very easy with my twins - They rolled out of bed twice, I think? (once each). They weren't daunted by the change and it didn't cause any problems. But that's just my kids!

Take the sides off. My boy is 3.5 and still in his cot bed because like you we are moving soon and getting all new beds so want to avoid it until then but he’s had his sides off for a good 9 months

I’ll buck the trend.

Theres so much change with a house move that a bed change is neither here nor there in the grand scale.

Do what works for you.

I find this very odd. Why haven’t you at least taken the sides off before now?

What about the toilet in the night? Can he get himself out?

I agree, on both :-).

My child is the same age and is in a full sized single cabin bed with a ladder. He loves his bed but couldn’t use it to dress himself because it’s a cabin bed (he does dress himself, just on the floor). He also definitely wouldn’t wake up on his own and play quietly in the morning, although he does sit and “read” quietly on his own after lunch. All 3.5 year olds are different.

A bit over dramatic to say 3.5 is “almost 4”.

I would buy the new bed for the next house now and just use the mattress on the floor until you move.

Anyone else’s back aching at the thought of hauling a three year old out of a cot? 😂

My 3 year old slept in his baby brother’s cot the other night because husband was very sick so I slept in the 3 year old’s bed with the baby. He was perfectly happy in it. Like a lot of kids his age he’s still in pull ups at night although we’re actively working on that issue at the moment.

My eldest climbed out at 15 months, can’t believe anyone would be able to contain a child past 2 in a cot.

Just take one side off and if you are short of space, put the spare side between the side of the cot with the rail still on and the wall. Then he can start to climb in and out themselves. We've done this. DD1 is nowhere near nighttrained yet - still having massive full nappies on a morning and was quite happy with the sides still on her cot until 3yo. But we took them off to start transitioning her ready for a big bed for when her little sister will need her cot. Its nice for them to be able to get themselves out of bed on a morning and either potter about in their room, or come in to see you.

Is the cot 20 cm longer than his height? If not, it’s too small, with or without bars

I think you’re putting your needs before his. He could at this age be getting up, going the toilet himself, pottering with toys in his room, drawing or playing. He could be sitting on the bed to dress himself, shoes and socks etc.
but instead he’s being presumably lifted into a babies cot when he’s almost 4. I don’t think that’s fair. It’s lazy on your behalf.
Mine were in cot beds around 12-18 months & single beds around 3. To promote their independence and because it was suitable for their development

Way too old to be in a cot with bars up. Fine in cot bed converted to bed

You could pick up a cot bed or childs bed from facebook very cheap to help him transition before movinf. Otherwise its going to be new bed and new house in one go which is a lot

Agree that really bed is better at that age but its just a place to sleep and I am sure hes not going to be 18 and still in a cot and really it wont matter either way in the end.

Agree with everyone not to do it all at the same time when you move

I'd take the rails off. Does he climb out? Otherwise as long as he fits in it comfortably, its fine. (We trained our eldest to sleep without sides from 2 and three quarters as we'd booked a holiday apartment for later in the year where they'd have to use a bed.)

As PPs have said. You can take the sides off a cot. Pop a couple of pillows on the floor if you are worried about him falling out.
DS slept in his cot bed (no bars) until half way through reception as he wasn't very tall and it gave him more floor space for toys.

3.5 in a cot with sides? Seems very babyish to me. I'd get a bed before you move so it's not too overwhelming. He can't be 4 in a cot.

Taking the bars off would be a way of getting him used to a full size bed.

Don't they have a height limit? Im. Sure mine were too tall well before 3 and it's dangerous for them to try and climb out. With the side off i think it's fine though!

Why do you want to wait until you move house? If it’s because he’s currently in a tiny box room and you want to wait until you’re in a bigger house that seems reasonable, but I would at least take the rails off his cot now. It will be a big change to move house and be in a bigger bed without rails all at the same time.

If the only reason you want to wait until the new house just because in your head it makes sense to make all the changes at once I would disagree and say better to change his bed now so it feels like a safe space to him before he has to go through a house move.

If you’re worried about moving to a bed because you have safety concerns (eg: his bedroom opens right onto the stairs) you could always put a baby gate on his door so he can’t get out of his room without an adult.

My DS is 3 years 1 month and still in his cot. He sleeps so well in it and I didn’t want him to switch and then be getting up all night. We will swap him in the next few months (once I finally sort his new bedroom out) but for now he sleeps a fantastic 11-12 hours a night in it independently, has plenty of space left, and has never tried climbing our, so I’ve not seen the rush.