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To think that not speaking to your own son is not a good look for the King ?

536 replies

Marmaladelover · 02/05/2025 21:08

Don’t get me wrong I think Harry has been a bit of an entitled burk but even so I was shocked that there has not been a reconciliation between Harry and Megan and the King and Queen at least to be civil to each other .
Refusing to even speak just seems like sulking to me !
That said I don’t think Harry telling the world and washing yet more dirty laundry in public is going to help matters .

Maybe some folk will think this comment belongs in the Royal Family thread rather than AIBU but it’s more about mumsnet standards ( sulking is not good ) and whether they should apply to those in high office .

Even JFK and Krushev had a hotline after the Cuban Crisis !

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BMW6 · 03/05/2025 15:22

Totally agree BruFord - plus it did neither of them much good, nor were they doing it for money.
Harry and Meghan need money to be replenished constantly as they must have huge living costs, but their only selling point is the connection to Royalty. The other stuff they've tried has pretty much bombed.

So only an absolute fool would let Harry have any access to information or conversation that he will obviously sell to the highest bidders over and over again. He has to because he has nothing else to sell!

He's blown it totally. When KC goes I cannot see Harry being welcomed back by KW ever for the same reasons.

What a numpty.

21ZIGGY · 03/05/2025 15:21

Fernandoo · 03/05/2025 14:42

The King can’t and shouldn’t overrule the courts.

I dont mean the security issue. I mean their family issues

BruFord · 03/05/2025 15:11

Deerrobin · 03/05/2025 06:33

I wouldn’t talk to a family member if they had form for repeating conversations (likely with a ‘creative spin’ and thinly veiled insinuation) to Netflix and their favoured Hollywood interviewer/pal of the day.

I agree that’s the essence of the problem @Deerrobin.

Yes, KC and Diana published books and did interviews back in the day, but my take is that there was a tacit understanding with the rest of the RF that once they’d aired their grievances (mainly about their marriage) that was the end of it.

Whereas PH isn’t going to stop selling his opinions of and interactions with the RF. Literally every conversation could end up in the media so presumably KC’s been advised not to speak to him at all.

As others have said, I can’t imagine not speaking at all to my children, but if I knew that even a casual conversation could end up in a tabloid, distorted to make me look like the bad guy, would I feel differently? Tbh, I think that I would. 😕

Fernandoo · 03/05/2025 14:42

21ZIGGY · 03/05/2025 08:39

I agree. Charles is the father, he should fix it. Of course he shouldnt have let it get this far to begin with.
Harry has made various comments wanting to be on better terms and thats obviously not been reciprocated.
I think charles and william are being as controlled as they were when it all kicked off but they should make changes. Charles is the king! His "advisors" cant overrule him.

The King can’t and shouldn’t overrule the courts.

CantStopMoving · 03/05/2025 13:30

SammyScrounge · 03/05/2025 13:19

Someone on another thread pointed out that he has the same level of security as Princess Anne. Why? She works hard for the RF and the UK. She is an utterly reliable and trustworthy representative for us..He does.nothing but be a PIA.

And she was the victim of someone trying to attack her and she still doesn’t insist on 24/7 armed security

SammyScrounge · 03/05/2025 13:19

Lupin4747 · 03/05/2025 13:04

We’ll ensure he has the security he needs for a start.

Someone on another thread pointed out that he has the same level of security as Princess Anne. Why? She works hard for the RF and the UK. She is an utterly reliable and trustworthy representative for us..He does.nothing but be a PIA.

Lupin4747 · 03/05/2025 13:04

Needspaceforlego · 03/05/2025 12:46

And how exactly is a Dad meant to stop their adult child from spreading gossip about them?

The easiest way is keep them at arms lenght. I'm sure it hurts Charles that he cannot trust is own son to preserve his privacy.

We’ll ensure he has the security he needs for a start.

Needspaceforlego · 03/05/2025 12:46

21ZIGGY · 03/05/2025 11:31

Be a dad, not a king?

And how exactly is a Dad meant to stop their adult child from spreading gossip about them?

The easiest way is keep them at arms lenght. I'm sure it hurts Charles that he cannot trust is own son to preserve his privacy.

Vaxtable · 03/05/2025 11:52

You only have Harry’s version. And the RF can’t respond as Harry well knows

Charles hasn’t contacted him probably during the case as he cant be seen to be influencing. Again something Harry knows

Then again if you were Charles what could you say in any conversation? How’s the wife and kids and what’s the weather like. That’s about it as anything else will end up in the press

if Your child constantly trash talked you and told lies about you and the rest of your family wouldn’t you be wary if talking to them?

Harry wants a relationship with his family then he gets down on his knees and grovels and even then no one will trust him

BMW6 · 03/05/2025 11:37

21ZIGGY · 03/05/2025 11:31

Be a dad, not a king?

No. Being King must come before anything - or he's not being a King.

The late Queen absolutely put her duties and responsibilities as Monarch before family - rightly so.

Leafy3 · 03/05/2025 11:35

I watched the interview in full and think its probably the best one he's given and comes across more likeable and reasonable than others.

For info - I'm an anti-monarchist, think they're all as bad as each other and don't believe we should be paying for his security.

Various statements I didn't agree with, thinking they come from a place of aristocratic entitlement but what was interesting is that RAVEC consulted with the Royal Household on Harry's security arrangements before making its decision - and before they consulted with them the RH his security was to be maintained, which implies the RH influenced the decision.

From what Harry said the members of the RH sit on RAVEC and these appear to be courtiers, not family members.

He said he'd not had a risk management assessment since the first decision in 2020 when standard practice is that they happen yearly.

So, although the Royal family are not directly involved in the decision process (rightly) the Royal Household is (courtiers).

Harry also claimed that the bespoke security arrangements were actually this: if he's invited by the Royal family to the UK, he gets full security, without an invite he doesn't. This would appear to be the determining factor in the case-by-case assessments.

This fits with full security being provided for Royal duties only, which I think most would agree with but I also suspect its the only way the Royal family have of controlling meghan and Harry's activities. No doubt there'd be far more stepping on Royal toes if they felt able to come over as freely as they wish.

I also think he has a point that the rule seems nonsensical if the security risk remains the same - and high - regardless of his reason for being in the UK. How this fits with the fact that RAVEC will give higher security to vips on an as needed basis, I'm not entirely sure. Harry seems to be implying that it won't actually happen for him (as a result of the influence of the Royal Household).

Certainly think there'd be uproar if we were paying for Harry & Meghan to have full security for the commercial interests and personal projects, which wouldn't be misplaced (I'd definitely be pissed off with this).

I accept there's a level of unfairness for him personally, given he was born a prince, but I think of all the millions of people who can't return to their homelands to visit family because of personal danger and he remains immensely privileged, can travel the world, and so my sympathy stops there. He needs to suck it up.

That said, it's wrong he hasn't had hasn't a risk management assessment in 5 years and that should be independent of the Royal Household.

The rift with his family is objectively very sad, as all estrangements (or their causes) are and I feel for him that he doesn't know the details of his father's prognosis. But, that's also a personal matter and not any of our business.

Like a pp I noticed the hypocrisy in saying this to the press when Thomas markle did the same!

Far from being a man of the people, I felt Harry oozed aristocratic-ness in this interview, he seems to do so more & more, and he seems to have a blindspot about the level of his privilege.

Perhaps as a republican, I also baulked at his talking about his continued public service as I really don't see much of this and certainly no more than many of us who volunteer regularly. I also disagreed with him saying that although he is has been made a private citizen, he will in fact never be one - the press and public won't let him be.

Charitable work and his birth doesn't entitle him to anymore privilege than the rest of us. Same goes for the rest of the Royal family, we only tolerate it because of the monarchs role as Head of state and their public duties. While he has a point with the unfairness of certain things, they all seem to depend on an acceptance that the Royal family is entitled to great privilege virtue of their birth.

The aristocratic entitlement I see with him in interviews makes me convinced we should abolish the aristocracy as whole, tbh, and redistribute its collective wealth.

21ZIGGY · 03/05/2025 11:31

Needspaceforlego · 03/05/2025 08:47

How can Charles fix Harry's rent-a-mouth?
Glue it shut or just give him nothing to talk about.

Be a dad, not a king?

BMW6 · 03/05/2025 11:26

Cantabulous · 03/05/2025 08:55

I am and will always be on Harry’s side. Charles is a loathsome, cruel, weak, cheating, misogynistic excuse for a man. I will never forget or forgive to my dying day how he treated Diana. Not my king.

Of course he’s also not Harry’s father, which is awkward…

So Diana was a slut?

FunMustard · 03/05/2025 11:22

Harry is petulant and I don't believe a word out of his mouth.

Createausername1970 · 03/05/2025 11:20

CantStopMoving · 03/05/2025 08:56

He absolutely a choice whether to be public property. Why can zara and Peter live quiet lives away from any interest? They were grandchildren of the late Queen also. Whilst he is the son of the King, the only real interest is the line of succession and there are three Wales children who are now coming up to their teens. If Prince Harry just went and lived a quiet life like his cousins no one would take any interest whatsoever. remember Princess Margaret, despite her very colourful life, never caused the queen the level of problems Prince Harry causes.

He, himself, brings attention to his family. Megan also is now by monetising them. I have a degree of sympathy for him in that he didn’t ask to be born into the RF but at the same time he does have the choice to keep the royal titles. He also chooses to make money off the back of his family. Again, all choices. He says one thing and does another.

Agreed.

The skit last year (was it South Park?) The World Wide "we want privacy" Tour.

If they don't want to continue to be working Royals, then fair enough. I wouldn't want to do it, your life is not your own. I was fully accepting of their decision to walk away and live private lives. Good on them, was my thought.

But this constant bleating, complaining, wanting to use the Sussex moniker, wanting their children to be HRH, cashing in on their Royalty, nicking the Queen's childhood nickname for their daughter, it all annoys me. One thing or the other.

My understanding is that Harry will receive protection when he is over here, but just the same for any other private person. I am guessing he can also bring his own security too, but they will have to abide by our firearms laws etc.

Harry is a grown man. He should have thought of all this and discussed it properly with the right people first, before deciding to flounce. If anyone is to blame for him not having the security he thinks he is entitled to, or putting his family at risk, then it's on him for just assuming that everything would remain the same. It's like leaving a job and then complaining they aren't paying into your pension any more, or haven't renewed your season ticket loan.

Theunamedcat · 03/05/2025 11:13

HRTQueen · 03/05/2025 09:29

Of course because of who he is he is recognisable to millions of people and do you think he could really go about his every day life without being constantly pestered and that is the very least of his concerns

and the British press would never leave him alone he is too lucrative and the most senior royals are seen as owned by the public, belonging to the public their rights of privacy don’t exist they couldn’t even grieve for their mother in private the public wanted updates so they were paraded about for all of us to see

there is immense interest in him in the US

The story is who he is and still tied in with the fascination of his mother

it’s a horrible life with huge privilege the least that should be owed to him is peace of mind to keep his family safe

He wants more security than the literal heir to the throne to be seen as more important more at risk more in need of protection the simple fact is he isn't and doesn't need it

BigAnne · 03/05/2025 10:58

Longma · 03/05/2025 10:24

Both his parents dealt with personal issues by speaking to the media - and making things a whole lot worse.
Not sure really that Harry has done much different to what both his parents did years ago.

They're like a posh version of the Jeremy Kyle show.

Longma · 03/05/2025 10:24

Both his parents dealt with personal issues by speaking to the media - and making things a whole lot worse.
Not sure really that Harry has done much different to what both his parents did years ago.

Longma · 03/05/2025 10:21

Harry is a product of his parent’s making.
Neither of them, nor I suspect many others in the family, were ideal role models.

ThatNimblePeer · 03/05/2025 10:20

Letsummercommence · 03/05/2025 10:16

I don’t agree with this. Harry is Diana’s son, that in itself has made him public property in a way that doesn’t remotely apply to Zara or Peter, or even Princess Margaret. Irrespective of what other choices he makes.

Theres an entire generation who never knew Diana alive. She is a piece of royal history forever stuck in the narrative she’s given. Harry and KC can use this or not.

The generation that never knew Diana alive isn’t the generation that’s currently editing major newspapers and controlling public programming etc. When they come into those roles then yes interest in Diana may be less. But that’s not where we are currently.

Letsummercommence · 03/05/2025 10:16

I don’t agree with this. Harry is Diana’s son, that in itself has made him public property in a way that doesn’t remotely apply to Zara or Peter, or even Princess Margaret. Irrespective of what other choices he makes.

Theres an entire generation who never knew Diana alive. She is a piece of royal history forever stuck in the narrative she’s given. Harry and KC can use this or not.

ThatNimblePeer · 03/05/2025 10:15

CantStopMoving · 03/05/2025 10:07

If he does nothing even vaguely interesting then whilst people might have an interest in him, there is nothing to write about him other than ‘Harry goes to the shops’ which would also hold interest for about 1 day.

he can live a quiet life. He is actively choosing not to. He has to take some responsibility for the situation he finds himself in.

Do the British public also have to take some responsibility for choosing to continue to have a monarchy and to consume and create news and gossip about them? (I’m including myself in this, since I’m on here). We could live a quiet life and never hear about Harry. We are actively choosing not to.

CantStopMoving · 03/05/2025 10:07

ThatNimblePeer · 03/05/2025 09:30

I don’t agree with this. Harry is Diana’s son, that in itself has made him public property in a way that doesn’t remotely apply to Zara or Peter, or even Princess Margaret. Irrespective of what other choices he makes.

If he does nothing even vaguely interesting then whilst people might have an interest in him, there is nothing to write about him other than ‘Harry goes to the shops’ which would also hold interest for about 1 day.

he can live a quiet life. He is actively choosing not to. He has to take some responsibility for the situation he finds himself in.

Superhansrantowindsor · 03/05/2025 09:50

CantStopMoving · 03/05/2025 09:08

on this we will have to disagree. If he had moved to the US 5 years ago and lived a quiet life off his millions and not done all these court cases and books and his wife had kept herself off the TV and not done any media, do you think anyone would really have any major interest in him? If there is no story people won’t care. No one took any major interest in Princess Margaret in general or even Princess Anne.

I agree with you. Look at Wills and Kate when they lived in Anglesey.
They could have gone quietly and by now would be nothing like the media attention on them.

Lupin4747 · 03/05/2025 09:39

Lovecatsandwater · 03/05/2025 09:34

When Harry makes a full public apology acknowledging the hurt and damage he has done to his family and our nation, and promising his appalling behaviour ends there, then I am absolutely certain his family will show forgiveness. Until then, absolutely not.

Do they not have to do the same?

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