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Disgusted by school’s response to complaint about pervy teacher - Final Update

688 replies

SophEll · 02/05/2025 13:08

Well, well, well. I’ve had a very lengthy and interesting phone call from the Headteacher (HT) handling my complaint.

I now consider the matter resolved, I’m sure you are wondering what was said and I’ve done my best to summarise below:

-My initial complaint WAS wrongly dismissed without investigation - as the comments made related to a school interaction.

-The HT has offered me an unreserved apology on behalf of the school for the handling of my initial complaint which I have gratefully accepted, as long as it’s also offered in writing (which I’m assured it will be).

-I’m told the Chair was most unimpressed to learn of my experience when complaining and an urgent review of their complaints procedure has been ordered. The HT tells me that they’ll ensure appropriate oversight is put in place moving forward and was extremely grateful for me bringing this to their attention.

-As previously noted, they cannot share the outcome of the investigation into my concerns about the interaction I had, which is perfectly understandable. Yes, I know he’ll get a slap on the wrist at best and should be suitably embarrassed, but that should be sufficient to prevent someone else going through what I did.

The term ‘tail between legs’ comes to mind for certain posters on here - I await your apologies with bated breath!

Thanks for those who’ve offered constructive suggestions on how to proceed, this outcome is a victory for anyone who has ever had a complaint wrongly dismissed.

I’ve also thanked my DH, whilst initially sceptical his support in emailing the Chair made all the difference. I have the utmost respect for how the Chair and HT handled this so promptly.

I feel as though I can now put the whole sorry saga behind me and move forward (I’ll probably give that bar a miss in the future mind you!)

I’ve told DH to put the champagne on ice!

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 04/05/2025 22:40

Even someone as thick skinned as @SophEll probably realises she's made a fool of herself and won't be back.

HuffleMyPuffle · 04/05/2025 22:36

Tandora · 04/05/2025 17:52

OP has not said anything of any harm to any “victim”. Literally nothing. She started a thread to discuss her experience of complaining about an innapropriate / aggressive sexual comment made to her , and the school’s response.
If people are projecting a load of their own shit onto that, that’s most definitely not on OP.

These threads have been absolute batshit.

Edited

And you continue to ignore

It's not a good look for you

Liverpool52 · 04/05/2025 21:13

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 20:25

But that's why thread three actually turned out to be so funny. IF it was real someone said for fuck sake get something off to that mad eejit before Bank Holiday or she'll be back again on Tuesday

Op starts thread boasting and crowing about celebrating with champers.... ....resulting in some very funny posts. It didn't go the way she'd hoped.

It was all the "look at the people tantrumming because I got my way" gifs that got me when literally nobody was tantrumming just telling her, again, what a dick she was.

The sudden turn towards actually liking what had been said to her indicated how she was only doing it to be vindictive.

I pity her children.

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 20:38

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 20:25

But that's why thread three actually turned out to be so funny. IF it was real someone said for fuck sake get something off to that mad eejit before Bank Holiday or she'll be back again on Tuesday

Op starts thread boasting and crowing about celebrating with champers.... ....resulting in some very funny posts. It didn't go the way she'd hoped.

… which is why she hasn’t been back.

Fingers crossed 🤞

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 20:25

But that's why thread three actually turned out to be so funny. IF it was real someone said for fuck sake get something off to that mad eejit before Bank Holiday or she'll be back again on Tuesday

Op starts thread boasting and crowing about celebrating with champers.... ....resulting in some very funny posts. It didn't go the way she'd hoped.

Teanbiscuits33 · 04/05/2025 19:44

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 19:36

She started a third thread (the “Well, Well, Well” one) because she was hoping posters here were breathlessly going to ask, “What did the school say to you?”, “What are they going to do to him?”, “How much trouble is he in?” , “How will he be disciplined?”, “What could they tell you?”

Thankfully, 600+ posts later, nobody has asked those questions. Almost all the posts have been about how pathetic and downright odd she is. Not one person asked. Poor @SophEll 😂😂😂

The ‘’Well, Well, Well’’ was definitely her being smug thinking we were going to eat our words at her massive revelation of her ‘’win’’ 🤣. Bloody strange behaviour. Even if it was a troll post, she needs to get a bit more of a life.

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 19:36

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 19:10

Meh

Yeh she was just updating everyone with starting thread 3.
With literally nothing to update🤣

For someone that was so 'offended' by a teacher she met years later in a clubs very off colour remark she had NO issues in calling folk old bags.......she ate him alive, and we were dirty buggers and she was sore yesterday morning🤣 And how she was going to have a bit of roleplay,

I use that terminology myself but find it very strange she was SO offended.

Give me a fecking break that's the batshit bit.

Edited

She started a third thread (the “Well, Well, Well” one) because she was hoping posters here were breathlessly going to ask, “What did the school say to you?”, “What are they going to do to him?”, “How much trouble is he in?” , “How will he be disciplined?”, “What could they tell you?”

Thankfully, 600+ posts later, nobody has asked those questions. Almost all the posts have been about how pathetic and downright odd she is. Not one person asked. Poor @SophEll 😂😂😂

Iceandfire92 · 04/05/2025 19:21

Omg you sound like a right barrel of laughs...Well done you! What they told you was the exact wording of what we and most companies say when we want to get rid of someone who is relentless and particularly annoying. P.S your husband is probably shagging someone else and you will probably become the laughing stock of the playground with the spectacle you've made of yourself.

Clychaugog · 04/05/2025 19:16

Changing the vote after 5 mins = Dick move.

Voted YABU because OPIBU

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 19:15

Tandora · 04/05/2025 17:52

OP has not said anything of any harm to any “victim”. Literally nothing. She started a thread to discuss her experience of complaining about an innapropriate / aggressive sexual comment made to her , and the school’s response.
If people are projecting a load of their own shit onto that, that’s most definitely not on OP.

These threads have been absolute batshit.

Edited

Whooooosh

Clychaugog · 04/05/2025 19:13

<slow hand clap>

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 19:10

Meh

Yeh she was just updating everyone with starting thread 3.
With literally nothing to update🤣

For someone that was so 'offended' by a teacher she met years later in a clubs very off colour remark she had NO issues in calling folk old bags.......she ate him alive, and we were dirty buggers and she was sore yesterday morning🤣 And how she was going to have a bit of roleplay,

I use that terminology myself but find it very strange she was SO offended.

Give me a fecking break that's the batshit bit.

Tandora · 04/05/2025 17:52

HuffleMyPuffle · 04/05/2025 12:46

Wow

Actual victim explains how what had happened has been harmful

But Tandora here knows better

OP has not said anything of any harm to any “victim”. Literally nothing. She started a thread to discuss her experience of complaining about an innapropriate / aggressive sexual comment made to her , and the school’s response.
If people are projecting a load of their own shit onto that, that’s most definitely not on OP.

These threads have been absolute batshit.

MrsMappFlint · 04/05/2025 16:56

SophEll · 02/05/2025 13:08

Well, well, well. I’ve had a very lengthy and interesting phone call from the Headteacher (HT) handling my complaint.

I now consider the matter resolved, I’m sure you are wondering what was said and I’ve done my best to summarise below:

-My initial complaint WAS wrongly dismissed without investigation - as the comments made related to a school interaction.

-The HT has offered me an unreserved apology on behalf of the school for the handling of my initial complaint which I have gratefully accepted, as long as it’s also offered in writing (which I’m assured it will be).

-I’m told the Chair was most unimpressed to learn of my experience when complaining and an urgent review of their complaints procedure has been ordered. The HT tells me that they’ll ensure appropriate oversight is put in place moving forward and was extremely grateful for me bringing this to their attention.

-As previously noted, they cannot share the outcome of the investigation into my concerns about the interaction I had, which is perfectly understandable. Yes, I know he’ll get a slap on the wrist at best and should be suitably embarrassed, but that should be sufficient to prevent someone else going through what I did.

The term ‘tail between legs’ comes to mind for certain posters on here - I await your apologies with bated breath!

Thanks for those who’ve offered constructive suggestions on how to proceed, this outcome is a victory for anyone who has ever had a complaint wrongly dismissed.

I’ve also thanked my DH, whilst initially sceptical his support in emailing the Chair made all the difference. I have the utmost respect for how the Chair and HT handled this so promptly.

I feel as though I can now put the whole sorry saga behind me and move forward (I’ll probably give that bar a miss in the future mind you!)

I’ve told DH to put the champagne on ice!

Jackanory, Jackanory, Jackanory!

Yes, we're all open mouthed gobshites willing to swallow the latest installment.

Sad sack.

Dangermoo · 04/05/2025 16:06

HuffleMyPuffle · 04/05/2025 12:46

Wow

Actual victim explains how what had happened has been harmful

But Tandora here knows better

😆 🤣

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 14:12

cardibach · 04/05/2025 13:50

Not sure why you have tagged me there @iseethembloom . I’ve been saying it was nothing to do with the school and she was being ridiculous since thread 1.

My apologies, @cardibach. I muddled you up. It can get confusing when people are quoting each other.

cardibach · 04/05/2025 13:50

Not sure why you have tagged me there @iseethembloom . I’ve been saying it was nothing to do with the school and she was being ridiculous since thread 1.

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 13:17

@Tandora@cardibach @waterweight

The point is that he wasn’t being a ‘teacher’ when it happened. This didn’t happen at a summer fete or a parents’ evening.

He was not being a ‘teacher’ - he was being ‘a bloke on a night out’

Nor did the @SophEllhave children at the school where he still works.

@op, who presumably has little status or influence in her own life, was delighted that someone of professional standing had paid her a little bit of attention - “woo! A teacher!” (“none of you old bags could hope to be propositioned on a night out” - a post which she swiftly deleted).

Seeing an opportunity to meddle-make and pull focus to herself (she sounds like someone who is overlooked and possibly a bit isolated - hence all the drama and attention seeking on here), she went flying off to the school with her knives sharpened.

Absolutely pitiful.

She would not have done this if he’d been working in a different ‘professional’ sector - an accountant, or a local council worker, say.

She was massively geed up because a teacher (woo!) propositioned her.

If you’ve worked in a school, especially a community school, you quickly learn that the emptier the life of the parent, the more you’ll be hearing from them. Dumb people think schools and teachers are public property and use them as punchbags on which to take out their own inadequacies- as here.

TaupeMember · 04/05/2025 13:10

Victim 😂

What an insult to real victims of harassment and sexual abuse.

Funny how it's one person still going, be that you, op?

HuffleMyPuffle · 04/05/2025 12:46

Tandora · 04/05/2025 12:21

This is all completely absurd . OP was talking about a specific thing that happened to her involving a teacher and innapropriate sexual comments. She made a complaint to the school and was discussing their handling of the complaint:

If people wanted to jump in to discuss graphic personal experiences of abuse, that’s hardly OP’s fault! Her posts had absolutely f’all to do with any of that that.

OP replied in a somewhat spunky manner to people ripping her apart for complaining (to the effect that she had every right to complain and was glad she did so) Totally fair enough and nothing remotely “harmful” about it!

Edited

Wow

Actual victim explains how what had happened has been harmful

But Tandora here knows better

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 12:32

This reply has been withdrawn

Post withdrawn at authors request.

Waterweight · 04/05/2025 12:31

cardibach · 04/05/2025 12:19

hes Vile. It’s not acceptable. Everyone has said that.
However OP was wrong to pursue a complaint the way she has, and there’s no point in the applause anyway because she hast achieved anything except to waste someone’s valuable time in fobbing her off.
As has been said repeatedly on all 3 threads.

Well I missed alot of it to be honest 🫣 just saw the update & do believe he should be held accountable even if its just to the school head

PinkiOcelot · 04/05/2025 12:24

Yawn. 🥱
Both YABU and YANBU are skewed towards you.

iseethembloom · 04/05/2025 12:23

ilovesooty · 04/05/2025 12:19

People didn't say it was fine and acceptable. It was nothing to do with the school and the OP has quite rightly been politely fobbed off.

You deserve to be on the best mumsent username thread 👏

Tandora · 04/05/2025 12:21

WigglywagglyWanda · 04/05/2025 08:54

Ah OK

So she read all the dark stuff. People talking about abuse and experiences
they had, some of then quite graohic, and rather than post on the thread already there, she started a new one with champagne celebrations and so on.

That's on the normal human spectrum for you.

Thankfully not for me.

This is all completely absurd . OP was talking about a specific thing that happened to her involving a teacher and innapropriate sexual comments. She made a complaint to the school and was discussing their handling of the complaint:

If people wanted to jump in to discuss graphic personal experiences of abuse, that’s hardly OP’s fault! Her posts had absolutely f’all to do with any of that that.

OP replied in a somewhat spunky manner to people ripping her apart for complaining (to the effect that she had every right to complain and was glad she did so) Totally fair enough and nothing remotely “harmful” about it!