to ask why would you overfeed your child?

yes, a size 16 is of course overweight!

@CraneBeak

there isn’t poor food literacy, the information is clear, everyone used to get a book from the nhs about babies and toddlers though that information is now online. The problem is that parents (men and women) chose convenience, an easy life, seem to be unable to see the obvious - and it’s not just about money because takeaways and fizzy drinks cost more than homemade food and water!!!

we have more information than ever before if you want to read it, yet yesterday I saw someone tip coke into a toddlers bottle, they were a. too old to be using a bottle and b. Never put fizzy drinks in baby bottles!!!

Or may be she doesn't want her kid around fucking cars, traffic and dangerous drivers. Those who drive their kids endangering everyone around them are the proper thick hard of thinking ones. Social media has definitely rot everyone's brain. No critical thinking around any more.

That was really obvious OP

I assume some parents just give their kids what they eat (and what they eat is shit). If you haven't thought it was important to eat decent food yourself then I guess you wouldn't think it was important for your child either. They probably don't think it's a problem.

Size 16 overweight?

Oh yeah, I find that a bit annoying. It takes me over 20 minutes to walk to the nursery so I will keep using the pushchair for now.

I know a family who have 3 DCs and they are all overweight, the parents are overweight too. The parents clearly love their children but they post pictures of days out etc and the portions the children (in primary school) have are massive, they would be big for an adult let alone a child. Having an extra large Macdonalds meal at age 6 for example or a huge plate of waffles and cream. I just think the parents have lost sight of what is normal for a child and feed them adult portions along with very high fat / sugar foods. I really feel for those children as it must already be impacting their health.

Yes and they get judged by those who drive their kid around everywhere and by doing so deny their children any chance of normal development. Such a child is stationary most of their life, strapped into a car seat and inhaling toxins. Driving is much worse for them than being out in the buggy. They get all the poisons from the pollution. Parents with buggies are a lot less harm to the kids than those that drive their kid everywhere and take them to nursery and school or activities god knows where feeling good about themselves. Nobody taking their kid to nursery by car is fit to judge anyone.

I knew a parent who fed her very fat 9-year-old loads of sweets and junk food, anything he wanted. One day she told me about her upbringing. I went home and cried. Overfeeding can be a reaction to childhood trauma. It's not fair on the child, of course. I don't think many of us are qualified to understand what causes it and what to do about it.

With use of a buggy and overweight at this age I’d suspect Prader-Willi syndrome.

YANBU. It's classed as neglect. Parents have been arrested for it. It's a safeguarding concern. I hope the school take it seriously and escalate.

No, the harsh thing is children being dragged up by parents who don’t possess the understanding of basic child development. Don’t come at me for pointing out some people are less intelligent. It’s a fact of life, not an insult.

I don’t think that you’re wrong but your term ‘biscuit belly’ is just ridiculous OP. Any food in excess will make you gain weight - absolutely nothing wrong with a child having everything (chocolate & biscuits included!) in moderation.

@NewBinBag my DM is the same. She grew up without enough food, and she and her siblings went hungry so their father could have luxuries. There is/was always way too much food in our house growing up - it's a running joke in the family but it's not actually funny! I struggle not to be the same. I have no idea of normal.

I agree that poor diet is a worry but I'm not sure the judgement helps anyone, though. The mother probably isn't going to be shamed into feeding her kid better - that rarely works.

That’s a little harsh isn’t it?

I dont disagree with your basic premise but this is a bit of a silly statement. DS' football team age 10 and 11 was filled with chilren who were not in the slightest bit overweight.... but they were hilariously unfit. It was one of the reasons he stopped playing - he found it endlessly frustrating that on this team, half the boys could barely manage half a game before they were exhausted!

A lot of people are not very intelligent and sadly they get to parent children

Yes, I have a very good friend whose children's weight is a huge issue. How did it happen? It started with a very sick first born child who had significant health issues which may or may not have then led to allergies and intolerances. When the second came along, they were already into this mode of accomodating and so were perhaps too quick to let him become a fussy eater. All three of her children are ND and seem to really struggle with understanding when they are hungry or full and also are seeking the sensory sensation of eating.

She has seen doctors and dieticians, she tries loads of different foods that are healthier and lower calorie. She cooks things from scratch. She is constantly researching and reviewing options. But it is a relentless, never ending task that fails constantly.

I don't judge her. I feel for her.

Fair enough @Ticktockwatchclock but it has to end somewhere??

The parent (father included) needs to actually parent, and that means a proper diet

Obviously it's really bad for a child to be that overweight and yes it is neglectful of parents to let their child get to that point and to do nothing about it.

However... I really don't see the point of this kind of faux-naïve 'But I don't understand why....' thread, which is typical of MN. There are lots of obvious and unfortunate reasons why some parents do this. Do you really honestly need them pointing out to you?

Be prepared for a flaming obviously

But as a previous fat kid (not to the extent of the op, just too much good food) I can say that being obese as a child follows you forever

Its absolutely outrageous.

I have 3 children and the amount of times i have stood at sports day and watched less than half the class children able to run the width ( not length) of the pitches.

I speak to my children about calories and nutrition, about how important a healthy balanced diet is alongside fitness.
They understand chocolate and sweets is absolutely fine but nutritionally they arent going to give them much so really if they are hungry its about making better choices to fuel their bodies.

My children train in competitive sports so are very active, they probably eat more than most children but what they eat is the key and i want to give them the foundations when they are young to hopefully continue these choices as they get older.

I was also overweight in my late teens to 20s and really would have benefited with the knowledge of how important food and fitness is.

I think it’s a shame that there is so much judgement around this without people knowing the full story and only seeing the situation from the outside.
You don’t know if that mum grew up never having enough to eat or her parents withholding food as a discipline. If she has unresolved trauma from when she was young she may not understand what she is inflicting on her child. She may well equate food with showing love and want to give her child what she never had. And why is this always about mothering, when does the responsibility of the father get held up to the spotlight?