to ask friend if she is going to pay my teen for cat sitting

Seems like she thought it would be free because it was your daughter and also you were part of it.

I would just say my daughter assumed it was a paid job but give her time to offer something.

Did you tell her teen there was money when she was cat sitting for you or did you leave the envelope as a surprise? Maybe the friend is unaware you left money and thought it was one favour for another.

I would say 'Dd is very excited to be getting paid for the petsitting as she's saving towards X. I know we didn't discuss a set amount, so how about £100 as she did 20 visits and I had to drive her there?'

She doesn’t want to pay

do let us know what happens! Hopefully she gives you something tomorrow. if not , i would probably just say ‘ we enjoyed it but won’t be doing it again, it did take a lot of our time going backwards and forwards & thought you’d throw a bit of money her way for her efforts !’
Catteries can be between £11-18 pn so really 🤔
As a pet owner kennels & cattery are part of the holiday expense .

Your friend was cheeky, I pay my next door neighbour £10 per day to nip in and feed our cats twice a day when we’re away, cheaper than a cattery, our neighbor likes spending time with them and the cats don’t have to leave their home it’s a win win really.

You and your daughter definitely should’ve clarified payment beforehand but I can see how it would be easy to assume tbh. If you value the friendship I’m not sure I would say anything on this occasion but if there’s a next time I would make it clear that dd will require payment.

Maybe if she brings it up on Friday you could just say actually you had told dd that your friend usually pays other teens to care for the cats so you’d both assumed that she’d be compensated for her time, doesn’t need to be confrontational or anything but perhaps she’s just been abit thoughtless.

Agree. Days of handwringing instead of a quick text: "DD was happy to care for Molly. You can send me her payment and I'll pass it along immediately. Here are my bank details. See you soon."

Bit of a drip feed Op when you suddenly announce that you paid her dd for the same.

Sorry OP, I think you’ve missed the boat on this one. You should have set the T&Cs before hand. There’s no way I’d ask her afterward.

20 visits with no payment is a total cheeky fucker piss take. I’d give her the benefit of the doubt until you see her next time and if no payment is forthcoming, I’d just directly say: could you pay DD for the cat sitting soon please?

This

'Bobby loved your cats! Did you want his bank details?'

Just text or even better call her and say’ just a reminder to say you seem to have forgotten to pay my DD for her cat sitting service so will you bring the cash tomorrow/if you don’t have the amount in cash her bank details are —////—-. Better to call because it’s harder to bullshit you when actually speaking in person.

You nailed it!!

I'd do this too.

Agree.
if you value this friendship I’d drop this.
Bung your dd some money.
I agree with pp - she asked your daughter as she did NOT want to pay the teen on the street who she paid last time.
she was after a freeby - probably thought your dd liked cats or something.
The time be bright and breezy was then.
‘Sure, but she’ll want twenty quid - roll eyes - you know teenagers…,,,are you sure you want to pay that .,,, don’t you know anyone who do it for free? ‘
up to her to squirm then…..

Probably hasn’t occurred to her to pay, I like the comment above saying DD enjoyed earning some cash and loved your cat, perfect.

in future something best to iron out beforehand.

Why not text a breezy

”just btw, [DD name] just asked me to remind you about some cash for the cat-sitting”.

or something like that. Now it’s not you asking, it’s her!!!

Yes or - x couldn’t see the envelope for her cat-sitting wages when she was round, sorry! If you give it to me tmoro I’ll pass it on to her. See you then!

If no mention of payment happened before she left then I don't see why you would be expecting any money.
She asked if she would like to cat sit, your daughter said yes, she never asked if she would be paid, she wasn't offered money, you are good friends so I would presume she was doing it as your friends.

Text and say

“Hi friend, this is a bit awkward, but I had assumed that as my arrangement with your DD was to leave some money for pet sitting, there might be something similar for my DD for watching your cat? Please could you let me know?”

As a cat owner, I couldn’t imagine treating a friend’s kid like this. I’d pay a tenner a day for 2 visits. I pay my cat sitter £12 a day for 2 short in and out visits and £10 per longer visit and I think that’s very fair.

Why would you not check beforehand?

I would find this awkward too and would possibly not raise it if the money was for me, just chalk it down to experience.

But I would feel indignant on my child's behalf if the friend doesn't mention payment, so would feel I had to raise the issue over coffee. It was no small favour really, considering you had to drive your child to her house each visit.

You are also in the wrong here for modelling poor behaviour to your teen. If you are too shy to discuss money for work in advance (and afterwards) then how will your teen grasp how to ? You need to discuss this with teen and explain where you went wrong in making assumptions, not discussing the rate of pay, etc so they don't make the same mistakes and apologise to them for not showing them how to be confident in dealing with these things head on

Message her your teen’s bank details for the payment. Just say he’s the info to make the payment. See you soon