to ask friend if she is going to pay my teen for cat sitting

I pay a professional cat feeder £10/day for two visits. She charges £6 for one visit. So I think your teen did well!

I'm sure small businesses hate being advertised and recommended.

When our neighbours dd was a teen at home we paid her £10/day for 2 visits, either cat while we were away a couple of days or letting dog out for wee when we were out for long evening.
she was very happy with this and she loved our animals

I'm not particularly fond of cats and when a friend told me she'd been let down by a cat sitter I reluctantly agreed to look after her 5 house cats. I took dd3 aged 16 with me to help. I looked after them on another long weekend with dd's help. The next time she asked I said I didn't want to do it but dd3 would for £5 a day (we went 3 times daily). She decided to get someone else for free!

This

I had similar in my early 20s in a low paid starter job and living at home, a very well paid colleague asked me to house and pet sit (think it was for a week). It involved cat feeding and caring for her two horses and it was a 50 mile round trip from there to our office instead of less than 20 from my parents. She got back from hols and she’d bought me a nice eyeshadow about £20. My mum sent me to work with strict instructions to tell my colleague that it had cost me considerable money to house and horse sit for her and ask her for it.

I think I'd be inclined to send her a text saying 'DD asked me to text you with her bank details as you haven't paid her for the cat sitting yet'. Short and to the point.

Worst bit is that cat woman is now in hospital so OP (and teen DD) are obliged to carry on with the twice daily visits until she gets home. Definitely unpaid.

If she didn't offer payment and you didn't ask about it i think its rude and entitled to assume you're getting payment.

If a friend asked for a favour that's what I'd assume it was. It would be nice if she paid your DD but I think all these comments about how she's a scatter brain and you hope she just forgot are an unfair expectation you've put on her. While I think it would be nice to pay her, and I would have, your friend didn't offer a job she asked for a favour and you agreed

I think you’re expecting too much it’s only £7.55 for 16-18 year olds. My DD13 gets paid £6 an hour for her job. I cannot imagine how feeding a cat, opening or closes a curtain and sorting the litter would take any longer than 30mins a time.

Haha, it's not fictional but as I'm using them in a couple of months, I don't want to give the name. I don't care if you think it's fictional. It's not and I don't have enough time on my hands to spend it inventing fictional pet care companies!

They:

Pick up the post and place it the living room.
Water my indoor plants.
Put the bins out on the correct day.
Draw the curtains on the evening visit, reopen them in the morning.
Feed the fish.
Do all cat care and play.

£10.75 a visit. 2 per day = £21.50 per day

True.

If thats what she'd said I dont think they'd be hoping for it, more expecting it.

Why were they hoping for £20-30 each? Is that what she said?

That sounds off of you. She offered the job for pocket money, why didn't you chase it up?

You must live someone fictional. I've done a thorough Google search and I can't find one pet sitting company that advertise feeding and playing with cats, emptying bins, watering plants and turning lights on and off for £10.75 what's the name of the pet sitting company you say offer this, so we can check it out? factoring petrol and travel that wouldn't even be a viable business for that rate. FYI the average cost for pet sitting is £12-18 per visit.

I feel your pain - our (only) neighbour up the lane, asked my boys (12 & 10) if they wanted to earn a bit of pocket money popping in on her dog twice a day before & after school while she was on holiday for 10 days. Her adult son was there overnight but works long hours so the agreement was for my boys to pop in and take the dog for a walk before and after school or play with it in the garden plus feed it in the mornings (her son did the evenings). In reality this meant I also had to go along, unlock and lock up their house and I watered the garden while the boys walked the little dog. They loved doing it, and were eagerly
looking forward to their pocket money (they were only hoping for about £20-30 each). However when she came back, she popped over to say thank you very much and that was it, no money, nothing. The boys were very disappointed, but they had enjoyed looking after the dog (we have our own dog but this one is a little toy breed that can be picked up etc, whereas ours is large and not very playful). I was too awkward to bring up the money, and I expect she just forgot about it. In the end I paid my boys £25 each for a good job done so they didn’t lose out.

Why do you think negotiating on her own behalf is "the opposite of be kind." Do you think there is something unkind about advocating for fair treatment for oneself???

Charging market rate for a valuable service is NOT "squeezing as much cash as possible from a family friend." How utterly absurd and backward.

The idea that she should charge less than the norm because of is so incredibly toxic. Don't train girls to be taken advantage of in the name of being "friends" or "being kind."

@TheHerboriste
I can't be bothered with your "hogwash", read my post again. I didn't suggest the child should be kind or be nice. I just don't think a kid, FEMALE OR MALE should be squeezing as much cash as possible from a family friend. I even said the child should speak up and learn to advocate for herself so she csn negotiate payment herself - the absolute opposite of be kind. Pet sitters don't do it for free but at least you're getting a professional adult providing that service.

£100 is decent money but OP was providing 4 lifts a day to enable it too. I think if teen has had to factor in 4 bus journeys and travel time with that then it'd have looked less appealing.

What utter and complete hogwash.

SO, so fucking tired of women being told to "be nice" and devalue themselves, to allow friends and family to walk all over them and expect their labour for free. What a horrible lesson that would be for this young girl.

The teen was performing a service. Not doing a favour. Why on earth should she be expected to do it for free or for a pittance?

Do commercial pet sitters do it to "be kind"? No. Pet owners need to factor the cost of care into their budget, not expect people to jump through hoops to accommodate them free of charge so that they can come and go as they please.

Telling young women they should offer their time and effort for free is just so counterproductive, obnoxious and toxic. Right when she needs to learn to put a value on herself and her labour instead of being compliant and "nice."

Next time tell the girl to investigate local market rates for this service and charge accordingly, requiring an up-front deposit and prompt payment. Including the cost of commuting.

I agree. My former pet sitter who now visits my house to fill the outdoor bird feeders and check on things when I travel charges £20 per single visit. More if she visits and walks multiple times in a day.

When I had a woman move in to care for my small dogs when I traveled, I paid her £100 per night, plus food, snacks, spa stuff, etc. It amazes me how people try to be so cheap when it comes to the care of their beloved pets.

Gosh yes, read the update, OP challenged her and asked for the money , cat woman threw a hissy, screamed and ranted, tipped over the table, rushed out into the street and was flattened by a trainee bus driver . Best update to a thread ever. Shame you missed it.