To think something is off here?

Yes, it really is best to mind your own business even if she is lying, but especially if she’s not.

When I returned to work after having cancer (but on chemo) colleagues told me all the time how well I looked and they couldn’t believe I’d had it. Not in an accusatory way as a lot of them had visited me in hospital where I was quite clearly very unwell. It wasn’t a brain cancer though, would she not have had her head shaved and some new scars at some point?

It’s a tricky one because some people live years with a GBM although it is rare. The operation, if it goes well, they try to get you home within 48 hours! The chemo doesn’t tend to make you lose hair as it is in tablet form to cross the blood brain barrier and the radiotherapy may or may not but would only affect the areas it hits.

So yeah, it’s unlikely but not impossible. You could ask who her surgeon was or which area of the brain as that would give you more of a clue, I’d say most patients could tell you either of those things immediately and include what that area affects, language/movement etc.

My Dad died from a GBM, one minute fine & then next terminally ill with 18 months to live. Very very few people survive the diagnosis, she would have had major brain surgery affecting her personality, mood & physical appearance as well as ongoing doses of steroids to help the swelling including losing her hair & significant time of work. She is lying!!!

You’ve got to be careful in this sort of situation because accusing someone of lying about cancer when they have cancer is as bad as someone lying about having cancer.

You could be right and maybe your colleague is lying but how could you be sure enough? If you’re wrong it would be catastrophic for you.

@WearyAuldWumman was the case you've described some sort of Munchausen situation?

I worked with a cancer faker. She got caught out when she provided a fake letter from her oncologist. We organised a fundraiser to send her and her children to Disneyland Florida for a final family holiday. She had lots of paid time off work for medical treatment and appointments. There was nothing wrong with her physically. She was fired after being found guilty of fraud and is currently working elsewhere, claiming to have terminal heart disease.

I think you’d have to be to lie about such things. No mentally stable person would pretend they had a terminal illness.

My cousin was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour in 2022 aged 45, after recovering from this previously many moons ago. I'm.not sure on the type, but she has been right as rain, recovering from ops fairly quickly, until this year where she has 2 strokes and God knows how many seizures. She is deteriorating quickly.now so it won't be long until she leaves us.
I hope the lady isn't lying, scum of the earth that kind of behaviour.

I would try minding my own business.

Actually, I’ve just remembered that an ex friend of mine told everyone in school her mum had cancer. I believed it for decades. It wasn’t true.

Then, in 2006, she told me she had cancel cells in her lymph nodes and needed an operation to have them removed. I visited in the hospital. It was a private hospital but she said her work insurance covered it. I thought, weird, her boobs like waaaay smaller and came home saying to my mum that I swear she’d had a breast reduction, not cancer surgery. Turns out, I was right. Nothing up with her at all apart from big boobs and she’s still alive and kicking today. With smaller boobs and one less friend.

Unless it’s actually impacting you in some way, I would just carry on as normal and not say anything to anyone and certainly not to her.. If the business are giving her special dispensation they may have received letters and medical reports and will know the truth.

I would not get involved.

You can think whatever you like, but if you voice those thoughts, influence other peoples thoughts or treat the person poorly because you think they are lying, you could be in for quite the backlash if it turns out to be true and dependent on who you are as a person you may also end up with a lot of guilt.

My brother in law did this (among other faked things.)

It's bizarre but it does happen.

No way to say whether your colleague is doing it, not knowing her etc.

Have you not watched Apple Cider Vinegar? Check out Belle Gibson. She’s one of many.

Was just about to recommend this, there's also a documentary based on the podcast. I hope she hasn't lied but it does sound like a very aggressive type of cancer, where there would be signs. Such an awful way to behave, if it is a lie.

After taking a huge deep dive recently into cancer fakers, she absolutely could be faking the whole thing.

Surely she’d have had time off for surgery and shaved patch on her head?

But, I’m also aware that not every cancer patient looks like they have cancer. My 91 year old Nan just had a hysterectomy for uterine cancer and was recovering at my parents’. I went to see her and she looked better than me. Took her to town last week and couldn’t keep up with her 🤣 buts she’s not had, nor having, chemo.

I’d be doubting this woman too, but I’m cynical.

To add some additional thoughts (I work in a related area):

Brain tumours are graded using a different system from other cancers, so it is not the same as thinking about people with other types of cancer (ie this is not about metastasizing, which you might hear about with other kinds of Grade 4 cancer). A Grade 4 brain tumour is the most aggressive and cancerous type of brain tumour, and GBMs are well known for their extremely poor survival rate (5-10% at 5 years with an average of 12-18 months). Treatment options are limited.

A normal treatment pathway would involve surgery, chemotherapy and radiotherapy, assuming you were fit enough to do so, and lots of regular scans to follow up. You would definitely look to do this if there were residual tumour, otherwise they regrow at a fast pace.

It is also very unlikely you would be back to work after 10 days after a major neurosurgical intervention, regardless of whether a wig could cover anything up. Access to these tumours is a big undertaking for the majority of locations for these tumours. Many people also require treatment with steroids and this often changes how they might look.

Reasons this might not be what happened here - 1. the tumour turned out to be of a non-aggressive or less aggressive type when they looked at the cells after her surgery, unlikely but can happen - thus improving treatment required and her prognosis 2. people do lie about these things, for lots of reasons, some reasons for which you might have more sympathy than others.

From what you have said, it at least sounds like a very unusual situation and I understand why you feel the way you do - but it sounds like it might be hard to challenge directly.

There's a man in our area who's been on TV on the surgeons edge of life series and he has stage 4 glioblastoma, he had the op on TV and although he'll never be cured they debaulked a huge amount and 4 years later he's still here, working, but will eventually die of it. Please tread very very carefully with your suspicions because if u dare say anything and you're wrong you are gonna be the world's biggest c u next Tuesday!

In the nicest possible way, wind your neck in. I have stage 4 cancer, the reason you appear "normal" is that treatment is less aggressive and it's more about quality of life. I am sure that her sick lines are not forged but also non of your business. I would be totally heartbroken to think/hear my colleagues thought I was at it because I felt well/didn't go about hang wringing, htg just don't....

Yeah, I saw that too.
Apart from attention, and perhaps additional support at work, what would she be gaining by lying about it? Has she asked for fundraising etc, for example?

As someone who is a young white female, incurable cancer parent, why on gods green earth would anybody ever fake having cancer.

I guess financial gain, but it honestly makes me so incredibly angry. Have these stupid brainless women never heard of the boy who cried wolf? Is it an attention thing? There seems to be a running theme that it's always cancer, never a stroke or heart attack or another critical illness. Boggles my mind.

She said that she had the operation then 9 days later she was fit as a fiddle and no symptoms as surgery had removed them all (obviously I am paraphrasing here)

This sounds very unlikely and to me, is a huge red flag… having a GBM ‘removed’ would generally involve a stint in ICU then rehab post op.

This. I know someone who died from it and did a tremendous amount to support research in this area.

There is some pioneering treatment but it is in the very early stages. I think the first person to receive it was in the news not long ago.

Her story is odd for this particular type of brain cancer. Other types of tumour, perhaps not but glioblastoma is particularly aggressive.

I was a university tutor to a student terminally ill with cancer. To look at her you would think nothing wrong - though I knew she wasn’t faking due to doctors letters and a charity involved in planning her studies through terminal illness. Other students said they thought she was faking. In fact she was managing her illness so she only presented to others when she appeared fit and well. The treatment did not make her lose her hair, and she remained a similar weight. She died a year or so after graduation. Very sad. A lovely young woman.

There are lots of stories where people fake illness in themselves or their children. It can be an illness in itself. It could also be a scam if she is somehow benefitting from a lie. I don’t blame you for being suspicious.

To save the huge question mark over her integrity driving you mad, I think it’s best to try not to think about it, don’t say anything to anybody else at work and give her the benefit of the doubt. You don’t want to be responsible as the person who blows it all up.