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AIBU?

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AIBU to be annoyed neighbour put spikes on the fence?

364 replies

SunnyLuny · 30/04/2025 17:28

We’ve lived in this house for nearly 5 years. At first neighbour was very welcoming and friendly. She’s an older lady (late 60s?) who lives on her own. She used to be lovely to our children. The past 3 years though shes just completely changed. She stopped talking to us, actively avoids us and blanks us. If we smile and say hello when we see her she looks down and pretends we aren’t speaking to her. It’s so bizarre. The only thing that has changed is we got a cat. He is an outdoor cat and admittedly probably does go into her garden.

Today she’s been hammering spikes into the fence! No warning or conversation. Infact whenever we go outside she runs into her greenhouse to hide until we go back in! I think this is so passive aggressive and I’m actually upset that she seems to think she can’t even approach us. We’ve always been friendly. She’s never spoken to us about the cat bothering her. I probably wouldn’t be bothered about the spikes if she had told us beforehand or said she had an issue with the cat. DP thinks I should go speak to her and just ask what’s going on but my parents think I should just ignore it. Aibu if I say something?

OP posts:
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WhereAreTheWildThingsNow · 30/04/2025 17:42

You are totally in the wrong here. My neighbours cat shits in our cat free garden and kills the birds that my husband loves to watch. I hate it but I love our neighbour of 20+ years so I live with it.

That you identify the issue and am not prepared to do anything about it is obvious. Your neighbour is just trying to protect her space.

SunnyLuny · 30/04/2025 17:41

SunnyLuny · 30/04/2025 17:39

It’s the fact it’s out of nowhere. She’s never mentioned having an issue with the cat - yes if she said something I wouldn’t tried to prevent it by cat proofing or even keeping him indoors. She’s literally not even given us eye contact for 3 years. I think it’s rude to put spikes on my fence with no warning at all. If she had a conversation with me to say the cat is bothering me can we do something about it of course I would have cooperated!

*would have

OP posts:
sugarspiceandeverythingnice12 · 30/04/2025 17:40

I absolutely and utterly DETEST cats shitting in my garden. I understand there is nothing I can do about it. I understand i have to "let them"......but fuck me it really really annoys me

The arrogance. The entitled ness.

If i had the energy I'd put spikes on my fence too

Go neighbour, go!

GeorgianaM · 30/04/2025 17:40

She is protecting her garden from your cat shitting in it.

What's wrong with that?

SunnyLuny · 30/04/2025 17:39

It’s the fact it’s out of nowhere. She’s never mentioned having an issue with the cat - yes if she said something I wouldn’t tried to prevent it by cat proofing or even keeping him indoors. She’s literally not even given us eye contact for 3 years. I think it’s rude to put spikes on my fence with no warning at all. If she had a conversation with me to say the cat is bothering me can we do something about it of course I would have cooperated!

OP posts:
LifeExperience · 30/04/2025 17:36

She has every right to take steps to keep your cat out of her garden. YABU.

rubyslippers · 30/04/2025 17:36

Presumably she is sick of your cat pooing in her garden!

HollidayRanger · 30/04/2025 17:36

Why do you need to ask her waht's going on? It's clear what is going on. Loads and loads of people hate cats shitting in their gardens.

Zimunya · 30/04/2025 17:36

Spirallingdownwards · 30/04/2025 17:33

.... the only thing that has changed is you got a cat, a cat which is presumably crapping in her garden.

She knows there is nothing you can do other than keep your outside cat inside to stop the cat crapping there so she has taken some action at her own cost rather than bothering you or putting you to the expense of preventing your cat from using her garden as it's personal litter tray.

What even is there to say other than sorry our cat was bothering you. Would you like me to reimburse you for those spikes?

Agree with @Spirallingdownwards , and I say this as a cat owner myself. She had no obligation to warn you about the spikes, or discuss them with you. It's clear your cat is going into her garden (I appreciate there's little you can do to stop that) and that is bothering her, so she's taken action. Fair enough.

CaptainFuture · 30/04/2025 17:35

Is the fence hers? Why should she need to consult you? Did you consult her before you got the cat?

sonjadog · 30/04/2025 17:35

What are you going to say? They are obviously because of the cat. You can't tell the cat to stop doing it, so finding a way to stop it happening is the only solution here. Are you thinking that you could offer to pay for the spikes or what?

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 30/04/2025 17:35

If she had approached you and said - Your cat is shitting in my garden, please stop it from doing so - what would you have said and, crucially, done about it?

jeaux90 · 30/04/2025 17:34

It’s the cat. You should cat proof your garden.

Spirallingdownwards · 30/04/2025 17:33

.... the only thing that has changed is you got a cat, a cat which is presumably crapping in her garden.

She knows there is nothing you can do other than keep your outside cat inside to stop the cat crapping there so she has taken some action at her own cost rather than bothering you or putting you to the expense of preventing your cat from using her garden as it's personal litter tray.

What even is there to say other than sorry our cat was bothering you. Would you like me to reimburse you for those spikes?

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