To think money given to your child should be saved for them?

Completely agree with this. It's all about balance. If you haven't everything covered financially then of course you can save the money but there is some merit to the idea that the children would benefit greatly from a lovely experience when they are young.

I grew up without a lot of money and would have really appreciated a day out somewhere special. This amount of money wouldn't have been life changing for me as an adult, especially as I became old enough to earn my own money and had the opportunity to save myself if I wished to.

It goes in the piggy bank. Sometimes there's something specific they're saving for, or sometimes if they see something they like the look of (and it something I'm not prepared to buy!), they'll spend it on that, as and when.

They need to learn about budgeting and value vs cost. To me, if the money is a gift, it's theirs to spend or save as they wish.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with using £10 to buy the child a new toy. Especially if it was given at a birthday for example. It's very clear that spending it on a toy they like is absolutely fine.

It's the same as if someone gave a £10 Amazon voucher. You wouldn't save that up presumably and hand it over at 18?

Unless someone says specifically "this is £20 for the premium bonds" it's okay to use your discretion.

If you were buying a bottle of prosecco or got yourself a new pair of trainers with it, then fair judging. But spending gifted money on a gift that you know your child would like? Zero issues.

The vast majority of examples have nothing to do with "robbing" children. Using money gifted towards a day out, or treating them to something nice with the money is in no way, shape or form robbing them.

Neither is using it to put a roof over their heads or food in their mouths if it's necessary.

Maybe given to your child should be used for your child but that doesn't mean to be put in savings for them unless the person doing the giving has asked for that. You could hit something for them, take them out for the day or spend it in any way yo benefit them. When people gave money to my children they lived to see what we bought with it.

It's not robbing.

If auntie gives £10 at 3, it's not robbing the child to buy them a cuddly toy with it...

not sure why you are concerning yourself with other people's decisions?

It could be the difference between the child actually getting a trip to the zoo or not though. Surely spending on experiences they may not otherwise have had us a good thing

We put it in her savings, but also use it to buy stuff for her that we otherwise might not be able to afford/gift type things, as the money was given usually for birthdays etc.S
So like a new bike or annual passes.

When I've given money to children it's always been for the parents to spend or save as they see fit or need to for their child. If they have plenty of money and it can be saved for them great, spent on day out or toy they actually want great, goes on necessities or pays a bill great. The more it's needed the more glad I am to be able to give it

If I have a chin money for their birthday I want the child to have something nice like a new toy or trip to the zoo I wouldn’t expect the parents to save the money till they are 18! If I took my kids birthday money and didn’t let them spend it or save it for a rainy day they’d be gutted! How are they supposed to save up for things like games or whatever?

Just reflecting that I've no idea what we do with money gifted to the kids because I don't think either of them has ever been given any!

I'd save it but I think spending it on a day out or getting the child something they want is entirely reasonable and judging people for doing so is pretty unreasonable.

The whole point of savings is enriching your child's future so surely something that does that is the same outcome anyway?

It depends OP - my parents would spend any Xmas/birthday money I received as a child on necessities such as bills and food. I don’t begrudge them that.
If the family isn’t struggling it should go towards days out / clothes etc.

You said “if they are being given thousands of pounds, it's evidently an entirely different question” - that’s what I was responding to.

(Also my example was £100 in total for a birthday, same again at Christmas, with possibly a typical gift from one family member being £25 - not a million miles from your £10 example).

YANBU to save the money for your child. YABVU to expect everyone to do what you do.

Nobody is robbing children (although taking candy from babies is for their own benefit, they’re likely to choke), just disagreeing that birthday money shouldn’t be spent on zoo tickets, the example the OP gave. A family trip to London zoo could easily run to £150+ just for tickets, travel and an ice cream, even without some tat from the souvenir shop or buying lunch - that’s a splurge and a treat for quite a lot of families and not something they’d just do willy nilly unless they had some treat money.

I did both, save and spend. Birthday and Christmas money especially, would normally be spent as it was usually given in lieu of a gift. I think about my intentions when I give money to a child - as long as it benefits the child, whether it sits in a bank account until they are older or pays for a trip or a treat or something that they really want. Does it really matter?

I suppose it depends, we opened a bank account for my daughter so relatives who want to pay money into it, can do so. (A few put some in on a semi regular basis) We wouldn't take that money out for no reason.
But a few times we have asked for money for birthdays to go towards an expensive present, so regardless of how that money got to us (directly to us or into our daughters bank account), we would have used it for that purpose.
As others have said, its a luxury to not need that money to go towards nice days out or presents for your child.
I don't think its a bad thing to use the money for your child's benefit now though, if they get access to it at 16 there's a chance it'll be frittered away anyway.
My parents used all money given to us as children for days out and presents and I don't resent them for that, without it, we would have done less fun things as children.

I'm shocked 73% of people think it's ok to rob money given to their children. Savings account till they are old enough to spend it themselves sensibly.

I've had to use it for food shopping or clothes shopping before. I've even had to raid the piggy banks before. It's not ideal but I'm not doing anything frivolous but we struggle financially. Most of out income goes on rent, council tax and household bills. We don't have luxuries. Fuck me I won't eat any strawberries because the kids enjoy them and they are expensive. I eat apples instead. I think it's better for them to have what they need now. Hopefully, things will improve as they get older and I'll be able to save then. In the meantime we do what we have to do to get by.

This sounds bad but hear me out. Kids are older now but when they were babies, had quite a bit from family and friends and we did set it aside. But after awhile we then pooled it with our savings to put towards paying down mortgage. We also have other investments which they will benefit from in the future. Plus we will still obviously help out with usual costs such as driving lessons, uni etc.

I don't have kids but if I did, I'd put the money into a bank account for them when they were too little to understand what money was, and then when they were older I'd let them choose what they wanted to do with it. I remember writing thank you letters where my mum told me to tell the person what I was planning to do with the money - so I'd say what I was going to spend it on or that I was putting it in my savings account or whatever.

I think if the kids are really little, though, it's perfectly acceptable to put it towards a trip to the zoo for them if it would be a stretch to pay for that trip yourself.

I don't think it's remotely acceptable (unless you're in genuine poverty) to simply pocket money that people have given to your child, even if the child is very young. Not only because it's not fair on the kid, but it's also not fair on the people who gave the money.

I used to know someone whose wife, after their child's christening, opened the cards and whenever someone had put money in, laughed and said 'Shoes' and put it straight into her purse. When he questioned that and said 'Aren't you meant to put it in a savings account for him?' his wife said 'Fuck that, this is my reward for giving birth to him' which struck me as really shitty behaviour.

If that money is the difference between a child being fed or not, then of course, the child's main need is to eat.

Also if they need something for school - shoes, a laptop, a winter coat etc - and the parents cannot afford to provide it, then that money would be used for the direct benefit of that child. Obviously as a last resort, after all other avenues have been exhausted.

My family sent ds book vouchers, being aware that ds' Waterstones habit was likely to bankrupt me. 😁

Now ds is 16 and has his own account, I pay it in, and he spends it on whatever he wants.

Firm disagree - £5 from Great Auntie Margaret isn't going to make much difference to my kids savings account, but the kids will get so much joy from going on a trip to choose something to buy with their birthday money from her, and she will get joy from seeing what the kids chose after half an hour of deliberation in the pocket money aisle.