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Original poster

To think people should stop pretending they don’t care?

56 replies

SnugShaker · 29/04/2025 14:42

There’s this trend where people act like they’re completely unbothered - about relationships, friendships, opportunities - like indifference is some kind of power move. But isn’t it just fake?

In the end, if you actually care but keep pretending you don’t, that desperation will show in other ways. Wouldn’t it be better if people were just honest about what they want instead of playing it cool to the point of looking ridiculous? Or is there something to be gained from the act?

OP posts:
Original poster
SnugShaker · 29/04/2025 14:49

driedgrasses · 29/04/2025 14:44

Gotta appear to be cool though innit? 😎

Haha true but sometimes trying too hard to look cool just makes it more obvious you care, doesn’t it?

OP posts:
Ph3 · 29/04/2025 14:49

Not sure where you are getting this feeling - I think it depends on the person. I care about everyone and everything - drives my husband mad. He on the other hand has very little interest in gossip, and things like that. He’s very pragmatic- sort of it is what it is can’t change it you have to work with it so may look like to others that he doesn’t care

JadziaD · 29/04/2025 14:48

I think lots of people dont' care about the things I care about, and vice versa. And I think often on threads people love to come on and tell other posters that because they don't care, the OP shouldnt' either. eg birthday threads - lots of people genuinely do not care about birthdays. So they think everyone should not care about birthdays. So yes, it annoys me when they come on threads where OP is upset by not getting a birthday card and say, "why do you even care? I don't".

But I don't think they're lying about not caring. I think they're just too self absorbed to be able to see that their feelings are not the same as someone else's.

BobbyBiscuits · 29/04/2025 14:46

Who do you think doesn't care, and how do you know whether they do or don't?

Some people are lazy. And self absorbed. They don't think that much about others, only themselves. They genuinely don't care about much other than getting what they feel they want.

They'd care if something awful happened to them though.
So I'd just take it that they'll not be immune to having any emotional response when life goes wrong.

I guess superficially it could be a kind of shield. Lots of people hold in most of their feelings.

StayingAnonForThis · 29/04/2025 14:45

Not really noticed this? In what context???

When I was about 13 and my boyfriend dumped me, I remember saying something "yeah it's fine, I just want to be friends anyway". Although I was absolutely devastated!! But I think that's the last time I noticed anything like this!! I'm 46 now!

Is this what you mean?

Bit confused!

driedgrasses · 29/04/2025 14:44

Gotta appear to be cool though innit? 😎