To not be happy that my new work lanyard has “she/her” on it without me asking?

It’s depressing that so many people on this thread think that preferred pronouns are actually a thing.

They aren’t, and this idea needs to be booted out of workplaces sharpish.

Pronouns don’t belong to individuals to chop and change as they choose. They are a part of language, which is a shared, collective endeavour, belonging to all, and they have clear definition - she for females, he for males.

Forget - I wasn’t asked - this simply should not exist as a concept at all!

It can't be company policy. They may well have a policy that states names and pronouns must be used as preferred, and (until this month in any case) that people may use the facilities they feel most comfortable with.

But it isn't legal to force people to declare pronouns. They can only 'strongly recommend' it.

Thank you, Maya Forstater. 🍹

You should ask it to be changed to "her majesty".

It's acceptable to ask if you want pronouns on there and if so which ones.

It's not acceptable for them to choose the pronouns by which you'll be addressed?

Surely that's kind of the opposite of the point of all this 'self identify as a different sex' business? Their equality officer or whatever needs some fairly basic training. 😂

Quite. I've spent my entire adult life fighting the notion that my sex is in any way relevant to the way that I do my job. I've also been on the receiving end of sexual harrassment and discrimination in the workplace. Why the hell would I deliberately draw attention to my sex? Turkeys and Christmas spring to mind.

My hard line on this is No. No signatures, no rainbow lanyards, no grandiose announcements, no nothing. It's one thing to demand, by dent of organizational policy that could see me fired for a breach, that I address others by the name they prefer, and that I don't use a pronoun they don't prefer (I avoid she/he/they entirely wherever possible).

It's quite another to police the language I use to describe myself, or attempt to lump me into a category (cis) I do not recognise and do not accept.

As they say in Scotland, 'get tae fuck'.

Yes, and also, know your your worth. I have skills my employer really needs. I'm a decent colleague and people like me. If I say "please can you reissue my pass, I didn't ask for this", they're not going to want to antagonise me. Not everyone is in that position, but let's not overestimate the average employer's appetite to piss off their reasonable, valuable employees for the sake of pronouns. I've pushed back on these things before and nobody's ever said "Well if that's how you feel you can take your skills elsewhere".

I would send it make and ask them to change it to "me/I"

Never accept things which fuck women over.

I think people massively underestimate how often we use pronouns about other people in their hearing, or in written communications that they will see. I work with some they/thems, and nobody ever remembers to call them that. I very often hear "he" and "she" about these people, including times when they are present. Hilariously, it's often people who have pronouns in their own signatures who forget. I'm hyper conscious of it because I think it's all bollocks, so when I'm around the they/thems, I'm hyper aware of avoiding pronouns entirely.

And there is a thing about respecting the law. Which companies have to do.

Gender critical beliefs are worthy of respect in a democratic society.

A work ethos that forces ideology on employees and is sexist and regressive to female staff, not so much.

I like pronouns, when included discretely, on an email signature as, like a previous poster said, when you have emails from many other countries it can help to build a picture of the sender more quickly and support the language used when referring to them.

However they seem entirely redundant on a pass and UANBU to complain that they both made an unprofessional assumption and decided it was appropriate to publicise it without your consent.

I think it would be perfectly reasonable to go back, point this out, and ask for a corrected pass.

Yes we do. We use pronouns all the time. It's just in face-to-face conversation it's mostly first and second person - I, me, mine, we, us, our, you, you, your, etc. And if people are speaking directly to me, I do expect them to use "you" without me prompting in, unless I'm teaching an English class to people for whom it's a new language.

I would be rather hacked off it my lanyard had pronouns on, too. I'm in a male-dominated field, and while I expect everyone to know which pronouns to use for me without me telling them, I also don't need to emphasise that I'm different, because it's generally not relevant. What's relevant is whether I have the knowledge for whatp

I have been misgendered at work - I've been called Sir by staff who haven't really been paying attention. They're usually more embarrassed than I am when they realise. But that is less annoying than when I was assumed to be a secretary rather than technical staff because I am a woman.

YANBU

There’s no way I would agree to wearing this.

As an aside, I’ve always wondered why ‘she’ and ‘her’ are both necessary? If you’re a she, surely you’d automatically be a her too?

I’d love to do ‘she/him’ for a laugh. That would confuse them 😂

My first thought too 🤣

Absolutely this.

This is virtue signalling only. If they cared they would be asking people and giving people the option to opt out. I’m even more furious about this than the idea of being asked about my preferred pronouns.

Good on her, she was probably making a point! I'm tempted to do the same at times (I was born female and I think this is clear to observers!)

I reckon this was a 'stealth piss take'

About 18 months ago I was in the Rituals shop in Chelmsford. The shop assistant (who was extremely helpful and knowledgeable) was clearly female, and presenting as female. However she was wearing a badge stating that her preferred pronouns were He/ Him.
To this day I am still wondering if she actually identified as a He/Him or if she was wearing it as a PA illustration as to how bloody ridiculous it all is.
I always hope it's the latter but she was young with bright orange hair so I was completely thrown.

Unless my job depends on it (and I don't think it does ...... ) I would always refuse to state pronouns.

Recently I was asked how I identify. I replied that I don't identify, but I'm a biological female.

Just remove them!! 🤷‍♀️ They cannot make you do it and this would definitely be a hill I’d choose to die on!! Do it today…see what happens…I guarantee that nothing will because they don’t have a leg to stand on.

If including pronouns is a company policy, and you are dead set against it, you are not a good fit for that company and should not have taken a job there. There is a thing about respecting the company ethos.

How convenient for you not to understand the issue, regardless of the fact it has been explained to you multiple times.

You cannot (and must not) force people to recite the catechism for a religion they don’t believe in- at work no less!
Pronoun obedience is a key demand of gender fundamentalists, it is a way of singling out those who are prepared to say they don’t believe it is possible to change sex - for the purposes of harassment. (because of course no one, not even you really believes it is possible to change sex)

Your faux not seeing the problem fools no-one.

And if it were company policy to assume your race, religion, sexuality, or Brexit vote, and add that to your work pass?

The 'big deal' is that it suggests OP supports an ideology that she doesn't believe in. I would point blank refuse to wear a badge with my pronouns on.
Surely if this is about respecting people's preferred pronouns, then it should also be respected when people prefer NOT to use them!?

I have to say that before the pronoun craze it was never somethign that caused any problems. The worst thing I can remember, is starting somewhere and someone was called Lynn who I initially referred to as she - I assumed a female - turns out it's an old fashioned men's name in I think Wales. No biggie, no literal genocide or anything, someone just said 'oh he's a man' and the problem was miraculously solved.