Not to let random parents drive my child on school trip

As a teacher, I have never driven a child home without another DBS-checked adult in the car.

I hear you. We had the same request and I did think.... Hmm...

But I couldn't take the time off and mine went with a mum of 5. I thought she would drive safe as her own is in the car and she wouldn't risk her own 5 kids being without a mum.

She was lovely and my child told me how she helped a child who got their period and they all stopped for an ice-cream at McDonald's....

It was a very small group of kids so only 2 cars so no chances of a bus.

The kids did well so they had about 3 trips ( sports) related so in end I was grateful that mum was able to do it.

But .... I don't think teachers are safer. Many teachers have been caught as paedos so I don't hold much faith in that.

Yes. As would our local vicar who's recently been removed for sexually assaulting a three year old in her car seat when the mother offered him a lift home ( mother got out of the car to get something. He turned around in the front seat and pushed his fingers up the little girls skirt).
There are perverts with DBS checks and perverts without . Opportunity is everything.

Know their name and face. There isn’t a single one I wouldn’t allow my kids to get a ride from. Maybe I’m just lucky to be surrounded by decent people. Maybe I’m naive. But I don’t want my kids to spend their lives missing out on things due to my fear or teach them to be paranoid as a staring point. Because you know what? The less you allow your kid a bit of freedom, the less ready they’ll be to stand on their own two feet when they have to. And that’s when they’ll really get in trouble. With no parent there to help.

Safeguarding red lights all over the place.

As a teacher we were not supposed to give lifts to pupils in our own cars.

If OFSTED were in and heard about this the inspection would likely to be very short (the inspection would not continue) and the school rated as unsatisfactory.

For those saying 'but they are parents too their children are in the car too' This is known tactic of abusers to gain access to children and build trust.
For example, in the podcast series 'the disappearance of Moira Anderson' the woman talks about how her father, Alex Gartshore, would use her as cover to invite other young girls into the car, they felt safer seeing she was there and knowing that he was a Dad and bus driver. Ultimately he was a child abuser, part of peodphole ring and in 2014, the Scottish Crown Office issued a statement that had he still been alive, Alexander Gartshore would have been indicted for the abduction and murder of Moira Anderson.

At my dds school (Scotland), we’re not even allowed to help out on school trips without having a full PVG check done. And even at that, it’s only trips where you’re always in a group including teachers (ie no time alone with a child)

it’s not just a car ride I’d be worried about in your scenario.

Yes, usually these people only have access to their own children, stepchildren or grandchildren. Unless they volunteer to drive other children unrelated to them on a school trip or give them lifts home. I wouldn’t risk it, OP - my child would be missing out on the trip.

So you know OF there people of the hundreds or thousands of people you’ve met in your life. Go on, barricade your doors. How many people do you know who’ve had serious traffic accidents? Likely more than three. Did you stop driving a car for that reason? You can’t stop living life due to a few bad eggs.

Lol exactly. The fearmongering is so sad. We’ve become so alienated from each other and lost any sense
of community. It’s beyond sad. We trust our kids more alone in their bedrooms on devices where, if anything, they’re much more likely to encounter harm, than out in the real world.

Two of those would have been DBS checked.

My youngest sons music teacher is in prison for being a paedophile.
My brothers scout leader was outed a as a kiddy fiddler.
When I was a teen there was a man driving around exposing himself to girls after school.

👏👏👏👏👏 such an amazing parent. Well done. you really can have it all.

id love your definition of “know”.

There’s far more traffic on the roads than there ever was, we live in much more disjoined communities than we ever did and kids are safer because we do things like use car seats ( and wear safety belts as adults) and try to protect them from predators.

We are more risk aware than ever before and that doesn’t make our children risk adverse, it just makes them safer. And who doesn’t want that?

So there you said it. A PARENT. Not someone else’s parent.

Whilst I understand your concern, the cost of a minibus would make the activity prohibitively expensive. I suppose it comes down to whether you want your child to be involved in these

I also work full time. Yet I know all the parents from
parents meetings and school bazaars etc and the parents WhatsApp group.

Most sexual abuse and assault of children is by a parent or stepparent - usually a man but not always.

I've done this quite a few times. The school stopped it when some parents complained, but sometimes there are local events out kids get invited along to but they can't go now.

I wasn't DBS checked, and nobody checked our insurance, and what the school do is send friends with the child, so we rarely took a child who hadn't been over for tea. I thought it was a brilliant idea which saved the school so much money and enabled them to do so much that would have been cost prohibitive otherwise.

The fallout got too much, despite it always being the same parents turning up to help as turn up for everything, (all of us had been in the school volunteering plenty of times) those who couldn't do it we're screaming about us all being child abusers who couldn't be trusted to drive kids around. Because of course if I wanted to kidnap a child I would absolutely make sure I got a car full of them and ensure that the authorities had a list of who was with me.

I’m not sure what fantasy land you live in. As a working parent, I could recognise the face of most of the parents of my child’s class. I knew some by name and I knew some to speak to.

DD’s school don’t provide any transport for sports stuff. The parents have to organise it between themselves and we have to inform them if one of the other parents is transporting. I don’t like other people taking her and try to avoid if at all costs.What your school is doing is definitely a safeguarding issue. I’m surprised they’re doing that

YANBU - absolutely weird on so many levels. If this was our school I'd have emailed also and wouldn't be happy for my kids to go

Today - unrelated to this thread, it occurred to me that more and more were teaching our kids that the world is a dangerous place and that they themselves are fragile and need protection.

instead of insisting on community, humanity and with courage and optimism showing them that the world is wonderful and most people are just fine - of course without being naive - and that we believe they’re resilient and can manage on their own.

and then we wonder why kids have poor mental health.

this thread is a another sad sign of this exact mentality

Nice people with an up to date DBS still drive shite-heap cars with bald tyres.

This just isn’t acceptable on so many levels. You may ‘know’ the other parents but what do you really ‘know’ about them? Do you know if they are reckless, suffer from road rage, have a drug habit, have a safe car … the list goes on and on.

The school needs a proper procedure if they are going to offer this. Sort a mini bus, a checked driver and charge transportation costs. Or maybe this is something the PTA can support.

And if they can’t look after their pupils safely and professionally, they shouldn’t be offering the trips.