To think she’s just lucky her kids aren’t fussy and not to do with parenting

I don't think fussy equals shit though. My nephew is very fussy but his mum scratch cooks really lovely stuff. It's just limited in range and he won't eat the same dish made a different way by someone else

The Kings Fund have some statistics on their website that says in the UK 47% of a toddlers daily calories comes from UPFs and that rises as the child gets older. I think that’s quite shocking - basically half of a 2 year olds diet is ultra processed shite. It is absolutely a parenting issue - whether that’s laziness, ignorance, stupidity or a combination of all three. It’s not okay.

I think she's wrong. It's a you thing rather than a British thing.

It's hard to tell without knowing her, because it is undoubtable that some kids are fussy eaters because they've never been exposed to much in the way of texture and flavour.

But it is also undoubtable that some children are fussy despite their parents doing everything "right", being exposed to lots of different dishes, textures, flavours, eating meals as a family, giving children the same food as the adults, etc.

FWIW, my in-laws are French, and their kids kick up a fuss about eating vegetables, one of them refused to eat any meat until he was about 6, another mostly subsisted on yoghurt and plain boiled potatoes for a long while...
But the French idea of "children's food" is a bit different to ours. So they do have "children's food", but it's things our (British raised) children find weird, like lots of sweet potato, or plain pasta with butter and chopped ham, or a plain burger patty with no bun, no sauce, no salad...

I was also once an au pair for a family in Spain, and every single meal time was like a war zone trying to coax, bribe and blackmail the children into eating a few spoonfuls of veggies. There were often tears and tantrums.

I've got 4 'unfussy' eaters 12 and under. People constantly tell me how 'lucky' I am.
This used to irk me as I have put effort into this aswell as the luck side of things with no sensory issues etc. Now I try to share my 'wisdom' ☺️
I think it all started with weaning for mine and up to about age 6 offering different things and being less restrictive too at parties etc so they could try stuff and not feel any foods were bad as such.

Weaning consisted of:
No baby food
Mini versions of what we ate- adapted for kids ( eg no salt or heavy spice). As working parents we have always tended to eat later, so often just cook extra for the kids to have the next day, or batch cook, which for weeknight teas generally works.

With a big family I have found it more cost effective to cook from scratch. Nothing special, generally pasta, stews, soups, spuds and veg + meat type stuff. We're also pretty strict with the older ones about mealtimes ( no alternatives etc) and all sitting together.

It's often time consuming and I find myself meal prepping when I wish I was watching TV or doing something else in the evenings but it's always been important to me. My mom and Grandmother were the same so I guess it's just been ingrained in me for better or worse.

Where I live you definitely don't serve DC beige food, you'd be judged for that, I have one late teen and teen and they won't touch bland stuff like that.

I’ve got 5 kids, well, they’re adults now (between 17-26) None of them are, or ever have been, fussy. They obviously have likes and dislikes (Brussels sprouts, eggs, bananas, mushrooms are among some of them will not ever touch) but have always been happy to try most things. 2 of them are autistic (as am I) but still eat anything.

We have always sat together for dinner and always eaten the same dinner. And that’s been whether we’ve had home cooked food or stuff you chuck in the oven. They like beige food, they like vegetables and fruit as well.

I could tell you it’s all down to my wonderful parenting and reveal my secrets, but I think it’s just luck.

I think it is largely parenting and culture.
British children often imitate their parents diets which aren't usually as varied as many cultures, and there can be a tendency towards more permissive/lax parenting styles.
Having said that, there are children of all cultures who are fussy, but it's worsened by parenting and parental diet.

SEND and allergies aside, it’s absolutely down to parenting and the shit they feed their children.

I think its a bit of both, however I did read the book "French children don't throw food" and it was an interesting insight into how the French teach their children about food.

I think it’s a bit of both,

DGS is 16mths. He will eat absolutely anything, but I know there’s time for that to change, however he’s never been given a chicken nugget, fish finger or smiley face potato. He was weaned on whatever his parents were eating, and they sit at the table with him for his meals whenever possible.

Read “French Children Don’t Throw Food”. There genuinely are things the French do that we don’t that will help with this.

It's luck.
Both mine treated exactly the same. One was unbelievably fussy, the other ate everything.

Everyone on Mumsnet seems to think this is a unique flaw of the British but I have one cousin - who doesn’t have SEN and has grown up to eat a normal range of food - who was an immensely fussy eater as a kid, despite growing up in Lebanon during the civil war.

(edit: I should note his identically raised sibling was a normal eater)

Sometimes it’s just the child!

I’d say it’s down to parenting

Weaned both my children in the same way, the first ate and continues to eat absolutely anything he is given, the second did so until she was one year old, she's 2.5 and now fussy.

I think there is a bit of luck in not having fussy children (lots of children with asd will have issues with textures and flavours fo instance)

I also think some children described as not fussy are fussier than you think. In that they eat a wide variety of foods made by their parents, but maybe they like them made a certain way or still aren't keen on stuff they haven't come across. So to one prrson the fact they eat spice sounds not fussy, but actually they wouldn't like pickled herrings any more than a fussy child.

Probably both to be honest (from an ex fussy eater with a very fussy eater, one middling fussy eaters and two non fussy eaters at home!!)

I'm another who says both.

As others have said in this country everything fron weaning food up to any "kids food" is often ultraprocessed so we condition our kids to consider it normal. I remember the doctor saying my sons stomach issues were my fault ( he had multiple allergies in the end) because I served him too much "adult " food that his stomach wasn't able to process it. 🙄
But I think luck plays a role mine have the odd thing they don't like but they are generally very good eaters so I don't need to worry if they don't finish their dinner one day.

Also vote for a bit of both. Dd1 was massively fussy when she was very small. I read books on weaning but due to dhs shift work we didn't really sit down as a family for dinner, I just sat next to her in her high chair and handed her finger food or squeezed stuff from a pouch onto a spoon. She hated eating, had a tiny amount of things she would tollerate. She did expand her palette eventually though. Dd2 sat at a table with us all and had her own portion of our food and tried things from our plates. We all chatted and it was social time as well. She ate loads of stuff.

We've just come back from Italy and it is noticeable how the children were so involved in meals.

But also, sometimes it's the child and 'doing all the right things' won't change hw they feel about unfamiliar foods.

I think she’s right. SEND issues aside, an awful lot of parents in the UK eat shite and feed their kids shite.
Those cultures that value food and family eating don’t have the same issues as are common here (and US etc).

My DD eats very well but it’s taken a concerted effort to not fall down the beige route, so many children’s menus only feature rubbish options and we don’t eat together much during the week as she eats at school mostly. But we did try very hard at weaning and her nursery food was varied and very good, so (onions and lasagna aside) she’s not too bad.

Think cultural differences play a huge part actually. Here, a lot of kids get used to eating bland, boring, beige foods and too much sugar.

Food culture plays a part. The idea that babies and children in the UK should eat different food - usually bland, beige and tasteless - to adults is pervasive and I don’t know why. There’s an inverse snobbery about food. If your kids eat fruit, veg, herbs and spices, lentils, brown nice, tofu people are more likely to judge you than if you feed them nuggets and ready meals.

It’s just food, natural, normal, healthy food that’s often cheaper than frozen beige stuff filled with unpronounceable chemicals. There’s an expectation many people have that children won’t enjoy complex flavours and textures and so they don’t offer them and then obviously when their kids come across them they don’t like them.

Blimey there are some different answers are here compared to a similar thread a couple of days ago! I got an ear bashing when I suggested you shouldn’t give beige food to children.

It’s parenting.