Son being targeted

i don't think teaching a toddler violence is a goo idea!!!

indeed. It is normal, but it is not universal...

You do know that biting/ harassing/ punching or even complaining to the parent still makes no difference whatsoever. How on earth does a parent stop their baby from biting in a different environment when they are not present? That's not a rhetorical question, seriously what would you do if your baby bit another baby? You obviously believe you could stop it, so pls tell us how?

My DS was a biter. In his case, it was ultimately linked to SEN - it carried on longer than most kids do, but I would say most kids in his nursery bit at least once. It was horribly while it happened, mostly because as a parent you can't monitor your child at nursery. I couldn't personally do anything to stop it; he did bite at home but for nowhere near as long because we could manage triggers better. It was horribly embarrassing

OP - it actually kind of is the nursery's fault! They should be providing this child with much closer supervision and keeping him away from children he seems to pick to bite. They should also be trying to work out what is triggering this child and trying to avoid this. There are extra funding resources they could apply for if this child needs more support, support they can seek from the local authority, and potentially an EHCP application if the child really does need 1:1. Obviously, you won't know if they are doing this but I think you can say, "I hope you're doing all you can in terms of applying for extra resources to support the biting child," and you'll know a lot if they just look blankly or say "not much we can do."

Lastly, 5:1 is actually not that great a ratio. Legally it was 4:1 for over 2's until recently, and it's still 3:1 for under 2s (I'm assuming the mixed age class allows the higher ratios). The difference between 15 months and 24 months is absolutely massive, and I would want a very clear sense of how the nursery manages the mixed ages.

At your meeting I'd say you see this as a safeguarding issue and if they can't manage the child you will consider reporting to Ofsted. It would need to be a last resort and I think Ofsted would need to see that it happens for an extended period with no resolution to even consider an inspection as it is happening in nursery's up and down the country, but the threat may focus their minds a little more.

Years ago when my son was at nursery - he was bitten twice - the first time I accepted their explanation - the second time I kicked off - no they can't watch all the kids all the time but if this kid was a biter he needed close observation and it was their job to ensure he was not bitten. I spoke to the manager and she arranged to discuss the issue with the parents again but the bottom line was ultimately going to be - if it continued to happen the parents would be told that the child's place would be rescinded. Irrespective of what the reason is and what is being done - you and other parents are not paying to send your children somewhere they cannot prevent them being hurt - repeatedly.

Some of these replies are a bit harsh. One of mine bit kids at school a few times, not even nursery. It was awful and mortifying and I felt terrible. I didn’t “stand for it” we really tried everything. I am sorry your child is experiencing this, I would assume the biters parents feel awful and are trying to fix it.

A nursery can pick and choose children but parents are not able to exclude a child from a nursery.

Actually they do if a child is genuinely unable to cope in the setting & NEEDS 1 on 1 care that can't be provided (like with safety VS 1-5 ratio)

this child may need 1 on 1 care which is what needs to be discussed with their family & it's not OK for the nursery to work with him while other children are being injured

Having worked in a nursery it is near enough impossible to prevent a biter every time. You can be right next to a child and they launch without warning, takes a second. Short of excluding a 1 year old child there is only a limited amount that can be done

No they don't have to exclude a child. And you can't demand it.
They have to work out how all children can be safe in the nursery.

Some day it's your kid or grandkid biting. Remember that. It can happen for all parents.

Biting can be a normal developmental thing yes but it shouldn't be seen as normal for a child to continue to bite and needs to be discouraged. Those bites look horrible and I would be asking nursery what they are doing to protect and safeguard your child, more than just keeping an eye on the other child as it's clearly not enough. Why should your child be getting injured when they're at nursery? That's not okay.

The nursery needs to exclude this child until he's older. It's not ok for him to bite 3 times let alone the same child with a history of biting ?!?!?

I imagine his family is close to a staff member there though for them to be "working" with them to sort it out rather then making it clear he's unhappy/unable to cope there so you may face an uphill battle

I had a biter. It’s embarrassing but fortunately (not not for his brother, Dad or I) he only would bite at home.
But it is about watching them like a hawk in nursery and stopping the bite.

Biting is normal. It’s a sign the biter is frustrated. Could be for a variety of reasons. They need to have a member of staff 1:1 with the biter abs to jump in and redirect/move him the minute the see a bite is about to happen. If they are not willing to do this then you have your answer about their level of commitment to stop the biting.
Just to say it’s unlikely your son is being targeted. They are toddlers and they really don’t operate that way.

They do sometimes. I’m not saying that nursery should not be doing more, but I remember posting about DS biting and no amount of removing him from soft plays or taking toys or time outs worked. I think because in that moment he obviously wasn’t thinking ‘ooh, best not do this as then she’ll take me home.’ Sometimes all you really can do is not to give them a chance.

It isn’t; my DS is quite chilled out now mostly.

For him, his language skills were a bit limited for a while - no delays but just not as developed as some toddlers, and I think that was frustrating for him. It tapered off as his language improved. He was also notably worse if eg he had an ear infection or was starting to become unwell.

I actually had a phone call last week to say there was a ‘biting incident’ - after DS, I was quite relieved my DD was the victim and not the instigator!

My kids have recently started biting. It’s a nightmare. I will say it’s hard to watch them all the time even when I’m home because I look away for a second and someone’s bit someone or is biting me. They are starting to stop now because they know they get in big trouble if they bite, but at the start didn’t seem to matter what I did. I know DS 3 picked it up from DD 5 and she laid off biting him once he figured out to bite back. I know my kids started this when they found out they were getting another sibling, which I think is a different reason to why this child is biting. I would be worried about the obvious physical harm, but also that he may pick up the biting behaviour. Like all the other advice said, speak to the nursery and keep on their ass about what they’re doing everyday. They might move the child if enough fuss is kicked up, but it really depends.

Oh and my biter now has the most points for good behaviour in the class so don't think was a sign of anything too sinister

Always been, but it is quite recent so many young children are looked after outside their home.

You have to work with nursery and you need to be very clear about it's not okay and you expect them to keep your child safe. Complain and demand a meeting with a follow up plan every time your child is bit.

If nursery doesn't see how important it is to keep children safe find another nursery.

So are you saying that it’s your parenting that’s the reason for this? Because it isn’t! I can assure you I’ve never bitten or encouraged either of my little darlings to bite; they just did. Many children do. Have you actually put ‘toddlers biting’ in google as it’s perfectly normal.

An adult approaching another adult and biting them however is completely fucking insane!