To not understand how people fund their lives and feel a bit jealous?

Controversially, I think OP is getting a lot of harshness on this thread.

We have to remember that on a 180k income, the tax and NI contributions will be high so the take home pay will eat in to the 80k. OP will also lose things like tax free childcare and 30h funding which will bring nursery / breakfast and afterschool clubs to full price. Mortgage repayments these days will also be high. Commuting in to the city for the job that pays so well will also eat in to the monthly outgoings as train and tube costs an awful lot. So whilst they are not on the poverty line, and clearly aren’t struggling, 180k really isn’t as much as it appears on paper.

OP didn’t come on here to say ‘I’m really struggling we only have 180k to live on’. She very clearly stated she’s aware of how lucky she is and that she has achieved a lot, but wonders how the people around her have more. Nothing wrong with that surely? It’s not just people on the poverty line that are allowed to wonder how someone else has more.

This entirely!

Unless your mortgage is 5k a month, which I highly doubt, there is absolutely no way you should be living the way you do and feeling like you have to scrimp on everything.

Her other thread is about planning a holiday in the Maldives.

Jesus.

I'd be using the holiday budget to replace my 10 year old car not sitting on a beach.

4x4 s are cheap. Nobody wants them. 100k miles on a range rover is nothing mechanically. If you're daft enough to want less than 20mpg knock yourself out. Ebay has loads.

My very successful adult DC grew up with us earing £42k for nearly a decade. It was hard after earning big bucks but I had to to be a carer.
I think you must have a huge mortgage and you'd be better to change that to a longer term if you are feeling the pinch. However it sounds like you'll inherit so the bank of mum and dad is not dry yet.
You really are tone deaf if you think you're hard up.
Be grateful and stop moaning!

I’d say it’s because somewhere you are living beyond your (quite significant) means and you live in a pricey area.

We are outside the SE commuter belt where you get a bit more for your money. We make significantly less than you (in our 30s, probably £60-100k household income). We managed to save nearly £200k for a house deposit on that over 10 years, combined with a bit of inheritance, and bought a 5 bedroom house with land and outbuildings we’ll convert to a holiday let eventually. We have 3 cars (none on finance), lots of hobbies, I have a horse. We live a very comfortable lifestyle and don’t need to worry about money. Hope to pay the mortgage off early in the next 10 years or so. I’d say our income is about £100k, though Dh is a company director so it fluctuates and it’s less than that now as I’ve been off work due to cancer the last year.

Somewhere you’re spending a lot of money on something that isn’t giving you a good return on your investment. It’s just about figuring out where that is and changing how you live.

I understand what you mean! We were in a similar position, good salaries but always felt broke and felt like everyone else was managing so much better. We went through our bank accounts for the previous three months and listed all that we spent. We were wasting ridiculous amounts of money on stupid things, especially on snacks and meals out, just tapping the phone and forgetting. We cut right back on that. Then, worked out all that we needed for every annual expense: MoneySavingExpert has a good budget sheet and then put away into pots each month so we always have enough to cover the basics of life. That’s changed our lives - we feel much more like every pound is working for us. But it sounds like you’re actually being careful already??

Yes. I think people who are doing private school, have larger houses, new cars, etc etc are probably on more than a dual income of 180k Pa. Or they have a fairly reliable bonus that takes them over this.
Doesn’t mean that what you’re on isn’t a wonderful combined household income - but around where you’re living there will be higher salaries, company directors/ owners borrowing against their business, high bonuses or they will be older and have paid off mortgage.
Hope you can appreciate what you have and try not to think about the others x

Sorry, can’t edit, I’ve just realised you didn’t specify £15K for a holiday yourself.

Taking the piss, making yourself look awful and self-centred.

Good luck surviving on four times the average national household income.

That was my reaction too. I earn 14k a year, I'm speechless.

You shouldn't get a 4x4 even if you can afford one

Maybe they were "lucky" and lost family members young and got inhertiace to reduce their mortage.

Or maybe they are SHAM becuase they can't afford the childcare bill - when I was one I had working mum friend swho got partial family help which reduce their childcare bill and they kept on why couldn't we afford it - I'd get them to do the sums with no family help and they'd be oh I see (ND kids also played a role).

Honestly this does read as a piss take.

First reply nails it as ever 🎻

Start with cheaper holidays if you can't afford to replace clothes? Seems a no-brainer.

Are you gamblers or drinkers?

You list various things in your OP that you could cut out/budget more carefully that would free up more of your substantial income - you must realise that?

I mean if you’re choosing to spend 1200 a month on food, full sky package etc then you can’t really moan about not being able to afford a coffee… that seems obvious.
The running costs of a normal “modest” 3 bed home should be nowhere near a grand a month.

You know what they say. Comparison is the thief of joy.

I’m retired. My annual income (no mortgage) is little more than your budget for one holiday and I still think I have quite a nice life. I go away for a week three times a year and my budget for three week-long holidays is about £3000 altogether. So for a start, look for holidays you don’t have to spend £15K on.

I have very little spare money it really gets me down. Summer coming and nothing to look forward to other than affording the optician and replacing the bathroom fan! Money goes nowhere.

Love it!

£180k and can't afford shoes? 😂 You fucked up somewhere along the line

I was wondering if she qualifies for top up benefits?

We have a decent income but don't have the big lifestyle, money just doesn't go that far for us either. I've made peace with it, and try to enjoy the little things.