To feel that breastfeeding is undermined?

Well this is all very dramatic!

Why do you want to talk about it? We have all fed our babies so we know about it whether it be formula or bf. It isn’t something to be proud about

There is a competitive parenting and martyr vibe to all this. I'm at the toddler phase now and the bad news is no one gives much thought to the formula versus breastfeeding, caesarean versus vaginal delivery etc. Partly as those ships gave long since sailed and it's not that interesting

It’s how you’re sharing that is the problem. It’s because you’re saying you worked hard and it’s something to be proud of. A lot of women worked hard but it didn’t come to fruition. There is an air of smugness in how hard you worked and if everyone just worked as hard as you did, it would have worked.

”That sounds really hard. I had a really hard time establishing breastfeeding with my first but I’m fortunate in that it worked out before my mental health crapped out/I’m fortunate that DH had an extended time at home with me to support me/I’m fortunate in that I could pay for a lactation consultant/I’m fortunate because I live really close to a fantastic La Leche League group because now I really enjoy breastfeeding.”

It recognises it was hard but it also reflects that luck was on your side. If someone asks, you can elaborate how it was hard and how you navigated it. If not, don’t. If someone asks why you are still breastfeeding, just say you are enjoying it and not in any desperate need for them to stop. It’s only the first bit that you struggled with because the truth is if you were still struggling 6 months later you would have stopped. You are still breastfeeding because it works for your family. If someone keeps pressing after that, they’re a dick and stop engaging with them.

@ThatBusyPanda part of the reason bf is pushed so much is because the WHO need to push it for the sake of developing countries. In those countries it’s very unsafe to use formula due to lack of sanitation. Yes it does have huge health benefits but a lot of those benefits are concentrated into the colostrum in the first couple of days.
before anyone flames me I know it does have benefits but fed is best. I’m pregnant now and won’t feel guilty for using formula if breastfeeding doesn’t work out.

@ThatBusyPanda
Please don't let BFing get to you.
You are doing a good job.

Being a new mum is tough, but you need to try and let the BF thing go, please enjoy this very short time in your life with your baby, they'll be running around eating crumbs off the floor before you know it. 😂

Fed is Best 👌

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK537105/

And what about the impact of hypoglycemia upon newborn babies due to insufficient milk supply?

I suspect (without evidence) that this would be a much greater problem for long-term health.

Yep. It’s the Hipp Organic website 😢

No you didn’t want to defend anything( as nobody cares) you said in your op you wanted congratulations and to go on about your “effort and achievement” which most people give in spades regardless of what choice they end up with.

Thank you, this whole thread has sent me into such a spiral this morning. Thanks to all who have shown support xx

I used to work in a hospital and I feel
its the opposite. I breastfed myself and was lucky enough to be able to do it. I’ve seen mothers coming in to the hospital with low supply and low weight gain in their babies. These mothers are so so upset and guilty when breastfeeding didn’t work out for them. I think it’s awful that mothers are made to feel this way. I feel like there is a certain amount of snobbery around breastfeeding as well in my age group, and that women are seen as less than for using formula.
in older age groups it was the opposite my parents for example are a bit uncomfortable about breastfeeding and formula was fashionable at the time when they had me.

You have to tick a box saying it's not as good as breast milk? Wtf?! That's disgusting. I have to combination feeding mine, don't feel guilty and bollox to that box you have to tick

Having exclusively breastfed my middle 2 kids i much prefer it to formula. I had to combination feeding my oldest and youngest. I don't like doing it because I feel I'm overfeeding my youngest but he has a tongue tie which has taken till he's nearly 2 months old to sort out

The effects of smoking and eating UPF are not tiny. The effects of breastfeeding are, even at population level. Vanishingly small.

Read this before making goady posts.
FED is best. And women like this poor poster are being made to feel inferior over actually making sure their kid gets food into its gut, regardless of where it comes from.

Why have we got to the state that women get so upset if they cannot BF? Who believes this is a failure? The baby industry is rife with judgement and self criticism. All mums should tough it out and believe in what they choose. Not go to baby group because you aren’t BF? Why? Most end up not doing it anyway. Mums should do what works for them. And be confident about it. No one else really cares!

Or alternatively, if the other mums actually thought ff was better they'd be less triggered by the OP bf hers for longer than 6 months.

So if you thought breastfeeding was actually better than FF it wouldn't matter what people thought, therefore this shows you wanting people to know your BF more that the benefits (according you you) in the first placr

Well… duh.

But the comment you were responding to is about the effects at a population level.

This post wasn’t meant to “help” the OP. It was a direct response to the “times have changed” comment.

But pretty much all health advice is only observable on a population level. Some people can smoke and never get lung cancer. Some people can eat upf every day and still be thin and healthy. That doesn't change the fact that it's good advice not to smoke and not to eat only ultra processed food.

You have to accept with parenting that there are at least 10 times as many opinions as there are children. It's tricky, I remember well the FF mums seeming a bit judgy, best thing is to just shut down conversation ("works for us, oh look a squirrel" etc) and only discuss BF with BF mums. One of DD classmates poured out all her BF journey to me just a few months ago, and her son is 7 now, but she had ended up with mainly FF mums around her. It's the same with many things; if your kid is high achieving then only talk with similarly high achieving mums about it, friends who have a child with SEN clearly prefer discussion with other families who also have SEN etc etc. Everyone is busy and tired, try not to expect more of people than they can manage.