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AIBU?

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You are given the power to make three things illegal. What would you choose?

705 replies

SpringSunshineanddaffodils · 27/04/2025 08:40

I know people will post silly things that irritate them but think seriously. What three things would you make completely illegal right now?
Here's mine:

  1. The right to buy your council house
  2. Owning more than one property.
  3. Not keeping your cat contained in your own home. With hefty fines if it is caught killing any wildlife.
OP posts:
TwoSwannits · 27/04/2025 10:14

We should be more like Switzerland and Germany where there are laws around the social contract to stop people behaving anti-socially. I might draw the line at times of day to hang your washing out, and not being able to mow your lawn on sundays or whatever, but some of them absolutely should be introduced here.

It should be illegal for people to stink up the streets and residential areas with weed smoke. It's so common now and so poorly policed that it may as well be legalised but people should not be able to smoke it anywhere but in registered cannabis cafes (like licensed pubs) or INSIDE their own homes with the windows closed. The rest of us shouldn't have to tolerate it wafting into our own homes from neighbouring gardens and getting a gobful of it from someone passing on the street. I work in a public facing role and the amount of people who come in STINKING strongly of weed is mad. It lingers for 20 minutes after they've left. Sometimes it wafts in through our ventilation shafts because someone on the street outside is smoking it nearby. Hideous.

It should be illegal for people to play music or videos or have phone calls on loud speaker in enclosed public spaces without headphones. Restaurants, trains, planes, cinemas, waiting rooms etc. I find it incredibly rude, selfish and and intrusive. Sadly it's so common and I think it's indicative of a change in attitudes generally these days. Everyone is so entitled and focused on their own 'rights' rather than their civic responsibility to others.

Fast food restaurants should be made to pay a litter tax, rising proportionately to the size of their establishment, to fund dedicated council clean up teams. This is because of all the lazy, filthy fuckers who chuck their McDonalds cartons out of their car windows, or leave piles of chewed chicken bones and kebab remains in lying on the beach or in the park.

Aprilweather · 27/04/2025 10:14

People to usually turn their car engines off when stationary

Actuality idling is already fineable in some areas. Shame it's not enforced really. Had some twats numerous times in front of the house idling for 15+ min. Mate, just turn it off.

Kardamyli2 · 27/04/2025 10:14

DogsandFlowers · 27/04/2025 10:11

Dogs are brilliant and help lots of people ☺️

Pet dogs are a complete PITA

Cherrytree86 · 27/04/2025 10:13

Everyone saying chewing gum?? Why?? So long ask it doesn’t end up on the pavements what’s wrong with it? Better than having stinky breath and it’s good for your teeth!

Teenagequeenwithaloadedgun · 27/04/2025 10:13

Poor driving or parking vans inconsiderately in residential areas would result in a driving ban. Anyone who repeatedly drove at 55mph in the middle lane of a motorway would be banned from driving permanently.

Crap jobs like Instagram influencer would be illegal.

Facebook would be amended to prevent people from checking in at hospitals and posting pictures of people who are sick or injured.

LinkedIn for work posts only, no karma farming using made up scenarios to look good.

Cherrytree86 · 27/04/2025 10:12
  • spitting
  • dogs in restaurants, pubs, shops etc etc (assurance dogs excluded)
  • people letting their dogs shit on pavements etc and not picking it up, this may already be illegal so if so waaaaaay harsher penalties are needed cos there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of deterrent at the moment.
DogsandFlowers · 27/04/2025 10:11

HelpMeGetThrough · 27/04/2025 10:07

  1. Dogs as pets
  2. Dogs as pets
  3. Dogs as pets

Dogs are brilliant and help lots of people ☺️

MaRhodes · 27/04/2025 10:10

What's wrong with buying your council house?

DogsandFlowers · 27/04/2025 10:10

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 27/04/2025 08:46

Dogs without both lead and muzzle in public places.

Why all dogs?

Dahliasrule · 27/04/2025 10:09

JulyJourney · 27/04/2025 09:31

I think that the OP is right and cats will eventually have to be kept inside. We're learning more about ecosystems all the time. 15 years ago nobody would have predicted that we'd have no mow May.
Mine things that should be illegal are:

  1. Vapes
  2. Owning a huge vehicle without a need for one
  3. Sheep grazing on higher ground.

i’m interested in number 3. Can you explain why this is bad? Genuine question.

cadburyegg · 27/04/2025 10:08

myfitbitisfucked · 27/04/2025 09:46

@cadburyegg very good point about child maintenance. The system is a disgrace and seems to be engineered to facilitate anything but child maintenance.

the three things I would make illegal are:

  • allowing abusive men to use the family court to carry on terrorising women and children.
  • being able to buy second and more homes and turning them into hmos
  • electric cycles and scooters hurtling around housing estates, parks, children’s play areas, shopping precincts. Absolutely lethal vehicles quite capable of wiping out a child or other individual.

Thank you!

and I also agree about electric scooters. Absolute menace. They have recently come to my area and they are left blocking pavements including the ones on the way to school. Gives me the rage.

HelpMeGetThrough · 27/04/2025 10:07
  1. Dogs as pets
  2. Dogs as pets
  3. Dogs as pets
ImWearingPantaloons · 27/04/2025 10:05

Dithering.

angsty · 27/04/2025 10:04

Standing still on the moving walkway in the airport. Immediate removal to the firing squad area.

Ellmau · 27/04/2025 10:03

Also, rough sleepers pooing etc in the street. Just gross.

Drunks who are sick in the street, ditto.

Littering.

Cismyfatarse · 27/04/2025 10:03

Caravans and mobile homes being towed on country roads / single track road or at any time when roads might conceivably have traffic. If people must own them they should only be moved between 2-4am.
Chewing gum.
Parking on pavements, near junctions or anywhere that makes driving or walking harder for others.

Cherrysoup · 27/04/2025 10:02
  1. Smoking
  2. Feeding any animal that isn’t yours, so many people treat horses etc as though they’re public entertainment or their garden backs onto a field containing animals and they think tipping their grass cuttings in there is ‘kind’. It can kill.
  3. Utility companies not passing on their insane profits to the customer and charging stupid amounts.
  4. Donald Trump
Ellmau · 27/04/2025 10:02

Cycling/being on a scooter.
The last one is a joke. Kinda.
They're always in the way! When you're on the pavement - nearly get mowed down by cyclists

Cycling on the pavement is already illegal; it's just not enforced.

Actually, where I am it's still not back to the appalling levels pre-Covid.

My choice:

Rats - just exterminate the lot.

Snakes can go too.

Introduce licences for cyclists, and ENFORCE EXISTING LAWS.

Chemenger · 27/04/2025 10:00
  1. chewing gum
  2. not walking on the pavement in a small fishing village (where I live) because you are on holiday so nobody else needs to drive along the road that you, your small children and your dog are ambling along eating ice cream. May be niche.
  3. parking over two spaces because you drive a BMW and someone who doesn’t have one might park beside you or even look at your precious car without permission. Particularly in small tourist trap fishing villages in high season. Some day an angry fisherman with a forklift is going to deposit a shiny car in the harbour to the cheers of locals, if he can manoeuvre round the “parking for fishermen only sign”. Again, possibly niche.
Kardamyli2 · 27/04/2025 10:00

meevee · 27/04/2025 09:55

I would focus on adequate punishment for stuff that is already legal tbh.

You want to punish stuff that's legal? 😲

sleepwouldbenice · 27/04/2025 09:59

This thread makes me feel very sorry for MPs, councillors and others who have to put up with the public every day. I hope you’ve looked at the voting % OP.

Mine are

  1. NRP paying for and supporting their kids. I have no clue why this isn’t dealt with now
  2. banning social media for kids
  3. banning all smoking.How stupid were we to allow the growth of vapes after managing to reduce smoking. And I am bloody sick of smelling weed everywhere
TwoSwannits · 27/04/2025 09:59

The cats one is daft and impractical but I am with him on the council houses.

Kardamyli2 · 27/04/2025 09:58

ScarlettOYara · 27/04/2025 09:49

Ed Milliband should be illegal? That's a bit strong.

OK. I'll change that to Ed Milliband's nutty net zero/climate change policies. I'd still like him to be illegal though.

PandoraSocks · 27/04/2025 09:58

Benefit bashing on social media

Companies hiking up costs mid-contract (looking at you Sky).

Electric scooters, unless they have a mechanism that makes them self destruct if used on public land

Hadjab · 27/04/2025 09:58

Why would you want to stop cats being cats? It’s the nature of predatory creatures.

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