Friends husband running the marathon tomorrow but she’s not going to watch him

Do you run? Because thinking anyone gets anywhere near the finish line in most races sounds like you don’t. No one gets to watch their loved one ‘cross the finish line’ for any big marathons IRL.

I run. DH stays at home and looked after DD when she was younger. THAT is amazing support.

If it was a one off I’d go. If it was a regular thing he did I wouldn’t.

Don't find it odd she’s not though. It’s very busy.

Surely this is between them. Is he devastated or indifferent?

People run marathons for their own gratification. You don’t share it with your family. He’s probably been out of the house for more hours anyone can count. In fact he’s probably obsessive. I’d let my DH get on with it. It’s just another day he’s doing exactly what he wants.

My friend didn't watch her husband. She said her support was in not throttling him when he was moaning his feet hurt for the next week.

I think that's fair enough.

If it’s his very first marathon I may judge her a little. Otherwise - not at all.
i doubt it matters to him either way.

As you’re so keen to be in her business why don’t you go @ML5 ? It might give you more to occupy your time with than being a shit friend.

It's incredibly difficult to spot someone in a big city marathon, even if you have tag tracking. I've done it twice and it was incredibly boring, and stressful because it feels so important to see them and for then to know you have, yet there's a sea of people all wearing similar clothing and it's close to impossible to find them.

My friend wrote a red cap to make it easier. I still nearly missed him, despite staring and scanning the field intently for half an hour. .

So mind your own business. She probably knows what it entails, and recognises that it's simply not worth it.

Wow there are a lot of killjoys on this thread. I totally get not going if he runs loads of distance events but it's different if it's a first. I've only run one marathon (London) and I saw my husband in 5 different locations (we planned it meticulously and he was ruthless on public transport). It meant the world to me and actually kept me going during my death spiral at the Isle Of Dogs. I also saw all the friends who came to watch (but don't begrudge them staying in one place 😅).

Although I do also completely get that everyone is different and allowed to choose for themselves what they do. I'm not against OP's friend's decision. More just the doom and gloom on the thread of it being a pointless activity. It's an amazing atmosphere on marathon day! (I've also cheered on a friend in a previous London marathon so I can speak from the other perspective as well)

I'm running GNR later in the year. DH has no interest at all, either do DC.
I'm.going with friends. He's doing me a huge favour for want of a better word. Keeping DC at home and entertained.

I feel the same way, I’m proud of my DH for his achievements when he runs marathons but he does several a year, as well as other races, am I supposed to traipse up and down the country? I go to the odd one but I think some enthusiasm and telling him I’m proud of him is plenty!

Actually, are you actually his mother? This is the kind of thing my MIL would feel about me not cheering for her son.

Does she even live in London? I didn’t watch my husband as we were 200 miles away in Leeds and my DS was quite little then.

I feel that a lot of these 'charity' events are largely for the participant's benefit.

Personally l wouldn't bother watching a charity parachute jump, even by President Trump...

...unless, perhaps, President Zelensky had packed the parachute. 😱

We went to watch my dad run the London marathon in the 80s and my little brother got lost in the crowds. It’s was stressful!

there’s a tracker given to every applicant and you can track via the app. We usually go for a few hrs when DB has ran it, but this year with a 3yr old nephew in tow we are just going to St James Park to watch SIL finish.

Do you have a little crush on the husband OP?

Haha, my husband does marathons, half marathons and 10ks as his hobby. I don’t expect him to watch me read (my hobby) so I dont watch him.

I wouldn’t go either. Cold and boring standing on your feet for hours. If it was a first I’d watch him start, put a tracker on him (think Strava/Garmin has live tracking that can be shared), go off and do my own thing and meet him at the end.

DH is doing it tomorrow and we’re going, but to be fair, he’s run several this year and wouldn’t care less if we didn’t go. We’re mostly going to experience the crowds and buzz of a big city marathon, his last one was a trail marathon along a deserted beach in February, so very beautiful but absolutely very different vibe…

That's exactly what I thought! As my mother used to say, OP, your knickers are showing.

you can track them so will see them. My SIL is running, we are all going to support

My husband and I are marathon runners. We either ran the same races, or supported each other…before kids. These days we enter our own and might go together, might not. Running is a different past time for us than it used to be. I love that we still have a shared passion but also the freedom to do what we want.

It’s simply none of your business.

Nothing more boring than watching DH run. I support him by taking the day off (I work weekends and we have young DC), making sure he eats well in the days before, and help him recover afterwards. He appreciates this more. DC and I have been at the finishing line a couple of times, but it’s not something I would go out of my way to do.