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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think it was not an overreaction to call the police?

589 replies

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:12

We were out today at a family event. We were parked up in the car park of the venue and were getting in our cars to travel home. There was a man parked next to us in the (relatively narrow) bays, window down, chatting to his girlfriend. He was there when we came out and approached our car.

DD age 8 was getting into the back passenger side of our car, so on the same side as his car. I was on the other/driver’s side. As I was getting in, I heard DD start to scream. Basically the man next to us had started to move his car forward and his back wheel had run over the back of her ankle/foot.

I immediately ran round the back of the car, picked her up, helped her into the back seat and took her shoe and sock off to have a look. The top layer of skin had come off and it looked bruised so I went round to his car, said sorry, I think you have hurt her so I am going to need your details.

He and his girlfriend then said ‘Why? I haven’t done anything wrong’. I asked if he was refusing and he said he ‘didn’t even know what happened’ and started mouthing off.

So, I called 999 and of course the second he heard I was on the phone to the police, he started offering his details.

Two police cars then attended. DH is furious with me and says I completely overreacted as DD’s injury was minor (scrapes and bruises) and I ‘see the worst in everyone’. I am very upset about his lack of support when our child was hurt and upset.

FWIW I would never move my own car when a child was down the side and if I had ever done anything like this I certainly wouldn’t be mouthing off at the parent of the injured child!

So, was it an overreaction to call the police?

OP posts:
EternalSunshine19 · 26/04/2025 17:42

Wowzel · 26/04/2025 17:18

No, because he had no intention of providing his details

Different if he'd apologised, shown any remorse...

I agree with this.

Original poster
hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:41

He did definitely run over her foot and ankle. She is missing a patch of skin about 5cm by 2cm and bruising around that. She is very, very lucky it wasn’t worse.

I told the dispatcher immediately that she didn’t need an ambulance but was injured and the other driver wouldn’t provide details. The dispatcher could hear DH insisting it wasn’t a police matter so she kept saying it was a police matter and that she was sending someone immediately.

I didn’t put this in the original post as I was just trying to give the situation as it was when I called to see what other people thought. And actually plenty think it didn’t need 999 which I take on board!

OP posts:
gamerchick · 26/04/2025 17:41

He ran over your child. Fucking hell man. There isn't a person here who wouldn't have panicked a bit. Despite what they're saying.

Hope the bairns alright.

BundleBoogie · 26/04/2025 17:41

And tbf at that point you didn’t know what the full extent of dds injury was - it could have damaged bone or tendons.

LittleGreenDragons · 26/04/2025 17:40

YourSnugHazelTraybake · 26/04/2025 17:26

So he was driving without due care and attention, tried to leave the scene of an accident without supplying his details, then got aggressive when you asked for his details? I can certainly see why you felt 999 was appropriate.obviously the call handler also felt it was appropriate as you got an almost immediate response, it would have been given a much lower priority if they hadn't judged it appropriate.

Although I personally wouldn't have called 999 I can see why you did based on this pp analysis.

Was alcohol being served at the event as well, because that might change my answer.

BundleBoogie · 26/04/2025 17:40
  • move 🙄
Applepe · 26/04/2025 17:39

It’s not an overreaction. You did absolutely the right thing by dialling 999, that’s what it’s there for. He ran over your child’s foot, refused to give his details and became abusive.

BundleBoogie · 26/04/2025 17:39

It sounds like your DH didn’t make any more to involve himself and tell this guy to give you his details ‘man to man’ so to speak so I don’t blame you for calling the police.

If you were on your own with dd you probably would have done the same and DH wasn’t backing you up so you effectively were on your own. The police would have been quick enough to tell you it wasn’t a police matter if that was the case.

Thisshirtisonfire · 26/04/2025 17:39

I would have reported it to the police on 101. And taken a picture of the guys car and licence plate, and of him.
999 does seem a bit extreme.
But it's also a crime and needs reporting. He shouldn't be so careless driving.. what if he'd crushed her foot? You should be looking around properly before you back out of a carpark space

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:39

Also, why did the police bother to attend if he gave you his details the second he heard you were on the phone to them?

It doesn't make sense.

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 26/04/2025 17:39

Why are people saying he didn't run over her foot? OP was there, and said he did. It's entirely possible!

I had a boyfriend in my teens that ran over my younger brother's foot - I was standing next to him and saw the wheel go right over it, nothing was broken, just sore and bruised.

Helen1625 · 26/04/2025 17:38

I think I am right in saying that, given his attitude, his refusal to pass on his details and mouthing off denying he'd done anything wrong, you thought there was every chance he would have just taken off into the distance. I think calling 999 was your panicked reaction to the situation. No criticism here. Hope your daughter is feeling better. The least he could have done is get out of the car, apologise and check she was OK. What a pig.

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:37

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:27

This is all very interesting and food for thought! The dispatcher said it was very much a police matter and they were there in minutes. I’m not sure what calling a non emergency would achieve where I had an injured child and the other driver refusing to provide details?

Probably because you'd told the dispatcher he'd actually run over your child's foot.

It was definitely a police matter, but not one that needed an emergency response there and then.

IdaGlossop · 26/04/2025 17:36

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:27

This is all very interesting and food for thought! The dispatcher said it was very much a police matter and they were there in minutes. I’m not sure what calling a non emergency would achieve where I had an injured child and the other driver refusing to provide details?

Had you told us in your original post that the dispatcher said it was very much a police matter, the responses would have been different. Does your DH know the dispatcher said this? If so, the issue becomes one about your husband's stubbornness.

UpUpUpU · 26/04/2025 17:35

Personally, if the cars were that close together that she apparently had her foot run over, why was there not an adult with her to help her with the door?

I hope she is OK OP, but it all seems a bit dramatic calling 999. If he was being a dick I'd have taken his number plate and called the non emergency number.

Where was the CTV from and what did the police do?

Advent0range · 26/04/2025 17:35

How is your DD now?

2chocolateoranges · 26/04/2025 17:33

I agree with your husband, you over reacted. Personally when in a car park I would always go to the side my children were getting in the car so I could hold the door in case they bumped someone else’s car or in case someone went to move their car. A small child isn’t as noticeable as an adult.

you’ve said it was scrapes and bruises not an emergency , the police are stretched at the best of time.

Hoardasurass · 26/04/2025 17:33

ExtraOnions · 26/04/2025 17:30

What did The Police do ? Or what did they suggest?

Was it a criminal offence? I’m not sure it’s a Civil one

Yes its a criminal offence he ran over a child's foot and refused to give his details and that's hit and run

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:32

He couldn't possibly have actually run over her foot without breaking it.

It sounds as though the wheel scuffed her foot.

Painful but I'm not sure 999 was necessary. I would've just taken his car reg and given it to 101.

I hope your DD is feeling better.

DUsername · 26/04/2025 17:31

If it wasn't a 999 matter then they wouldn't have attended, let alone so quickly surely?

I can't believe your DH was furious anyway. Even if he felt police weren't necessary, he's surely furious with the wrong person? It's entirely fucked up that he's angry with you not the idiot who hurt his child!!

TheMumEdit · 26/04/2025 17:31

I would have reported it not but on the non emergency line. That was an over reaction.

ExtraOnions · 26/04/2025 17:30

What did The Police do ? Or what did they suggest?

Was it a criminal offence? I’m not sure it’s a Civil one

ScrewedByFunding · 26/04/2025 17:28

He wasn't going to stop at the scene of an accident, absolutely right to call 999. We had similar when a car clipped my son on the pavement by our house. They drove off so we called 999 and DH is a police officer who made the call!

Original poster
hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:27

This is all very interesting and food for thought! The dispatcher said it was very much a police matter and they were there in minutes. I’m not sure what calling a non emergency would achieve where I had an injured child and the other driver refusing to provide details?

OP posts:
YourSnugHazelTraybake · 26/04/2025 17:26

So he was driving without due care and attention, tried to leave the scene of an accident without supplying his details, then got aggressive when you asked for his details? I can certainly see why you felt 999 was appropriate.obviously the call handler also felt it was appropriate as you got an almost immediate response, it would have been given a much lower priority if they hadn't judged it appropriate.