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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think it was not an overreaction to call the police?

589 replies

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:12

We were out today at a family event. We were parked up in the car park of the venue and were getting in our cars to travel home. There was a man parked next to us in the (relatively narrow) bays, window down, chatting to his girlfriend. He was there when we came out and approached our car.

DD age 8 was getting into the back passenger side of our car, so on the same side as his car. I was on the other/driver’s side. As I was getting in, I heard DD start to scream. Basically the man next to us had started to move his car forward and his back wheel had run over the back of her ankle/foot.

I immediately ran round the back of the car, picked her up, helped her into the back seat and took her shoe and sock off to have a look. The top layer of skin had come off and it looked bruised so I went round to his car, said sorry, I think you have hurt her so I am going to need your details.

He and his girlfriend then said ‘Why? I haven’t done anything wrong’. I asked if he was refusing and he said he ‘didn’t even know what happened’ and started mouthing off.

So, I called 999 and of course the second he heard I was on the phone to the police, he started offering his details.

Two police cars then attended. DH is furious with me and says I completely overreacted as DD’s injury was minor (scrapes and bruises) and I ‘see the worst in everyone’. I am very upset about his lack of support when our child was hurt and upset.

FWIW I would never move my own car when a child was down the side and if I had ever done anything like this I certainly wouldn’t be mouthing off at the parent of the injured child!

So, was it an overreaction to call the police?

OP posts:
Silsatrip · 26/04/2025 17:49

AmusedGoose · 26/04/2025 17:46

I would always supervise young children getting into the car, even if it's just to ensure they don't catch the car next door. I think you over reacted but we're just scared. The other driver was probably upset too tbf. The lesson here is to supervise your children a little more, especially in risky situations such as car parks or crowded areas. Your DH was possibly worried the other driver was going to square up to him or even use a weapon. You do need to remember we live in a society where these alterations can escalate very quickly. Also, get a dash cam.

I disagree, it's on the driver to make sure it is safe to drive before doing so. You often have to enter a car when someone is parked beside you - how is the child at fault for doing that?

ToBeOrNotToBee · 26/04/2025 17:49

No you're fine.
He was driving without due care and attention, caused harm to a person and attempted to leave without providing details.
Very much a police matter. And for what it's worth, 999 is for crimes that are happening. Non emergency is for crimes that have happened and doesn't need an immediate response. This very much did need an immediate response.

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:49

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:48

Yeah, realistically though there wasn’t enough time for that and I had already said my daughter had been injured by a car in a car park so they would either have called me back or traced the call which would have been a greater waste of their time

Edited
Show quote history

But surely you would've said, "Oh actually it's ok. The driver is now giving me his details"?

megacat · 26/04/2025 17:49

You should really assist a child getting in and out of the car when parked next to another. Apart from anything else it infuriates me when parents hop in and let the child just swing the door open with no consideration to bumping the car next to it.

DwarfPalmetto · 26/04/2025 17:49

Your DH is wrong, it was not an overreaction. The police themselves thought it was a police matter and responded accordingly. It could be that an offence was committed like causing injury by careless driving.

I hope your dd recovers well

PuppyMonkey · 26/04/2025 17:48

So, you’ve got the guy’s details? Or did he still not give them because the police showed up? How was it left? What are you going to do with his details? So many questions!

2024riot · 26/04/2025 17:48

IdaGlossop · 26/04/2025 17:24

At a time when we know that public services are run down, I think we all have a duty to think carefully about how we use them. 999 is a number for emergencies. This wasn't an emergency. You are also sending an odd message to your DD that the response to her being hurt and upset is to call the police. Why not an zmbulance?

Why on earth an ambulance ?

Original poster
hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:48

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:44

I would've told the police there was no need to attend as he was giving me his details the second he knew I was ringing them.

And then obviously taken my child straight to A&E for an X-Ray.

Show quote history

Yeah, realistically though there wasn’t enough time for that and I had already said my daughter had been injured by a car in a car park so they would either have called me back or traced the call which would have been a greater waste of their time

OP posts:
Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 26/04/2025 17:47

The police turned up quickly therefore they clearly thought it was appropriate.

2024riot · 26/04/2025 17:47

The thing is the dispatcher actually decides where police should go or not, they heard the information from the OP and sent an officer if they had more pressing calls they would have diverted to that

DiamondEyes976 · 26/04/2025 17:47

ExtraOnions · 26/04/2025 17:30

What did The Police do ? Or what did they suggest?

Was it a criminal offence? I’m not sure it’s a Civil one

You don’t think it’s a criminal offence to harm a child with a vehicle and try and drive off? What planet do you live on?

AmusedGoose · 26/04/2025 17:46

I would always supervise young children getting into the car, even if it's just to ensure they don't catch the car next door. I think you over reacted but we're just scared. The other driver was probably upset too tbf. The lesson here is to supervise your children a little more, especially in risky situations such as car parks or crowded areas. Your DH was possibly worried the other driver was going to square up to him or even use a weapon. You do need to remember we live in a society where these alterations can escalate very quickly. Also, get a dash cam.

Silsatrip · 26/04/2025 17:46

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:27

This is all very interesting and food for thought! The dispatcher said it was very much a police matter and they were there in minutes. I’m not sure what calling a non emergency would achieve where I had an injured child and the other driver refusing to provide details?

I'll go with the dispatcher as the most qualified to judge what you should call 999 for.

And why is your dh angry with you and not angry with the driver who injured your children and tried to drive off??

I'm impressed you were able to react so fast.

Enthusiasticcarrotgrower · 26/04/2025 17:46

YourSnugHazelTraybake · 26/04/2025 17:26

So he was driving without due care and attention, tried to leave the scene of an accident without supplying his details, then got aggressive when you asked for his details? I can certainly see why you felt 999 was appropriate.obviously the call handler also felt it was appropriate as you got an almost immediate response, it would have been given a much lower priority if they hadn't judged it appropriate.

I agree with this. He didn’t respond appropriately and that escalated it to a police matter.

Anewdawnanewname · 26/04/2025 17:46

So if you left, have the police not offered you an update or checked on her?

Original poster
hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:45

Also, I wasn’t on her side as I had no idea he was suddenly going to move, he was sitting there for ages, engine off. He would definitely have both seen and heard her as she was talking and his window was down, he was less than two feet away from her. Definitely a learning point for me

OP posts:
kierenthecommunity · 26/04/2025 17:45

Some rubbish being spouted on here. S170 Road Traffic Act, if you cause an injury accident you have to stop and report it. Getting a photo of his VRM may not helped, it may not have even been his car.

The police wouldn’t have arrived so quickly if they didn’t agree it was an emergency, they’d have politely said that they didn’t need to attend

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:44

YourFunnyTiger · 26/04/2025 17:43

For those saying op over reacted. What would you have done if it was your child/dog/cherished object?

You did nothing wrong OP, I would have been furious with the guy. Hope your dd is well.

I would've told the police there was no need to attend as he was giving me his details the second he knew I was ringing them.

And then obviously taken my child straight to A&E for an X-Ray.

ChoccieCornflake · 26/04/2025 17:44

Cross posted with your last post. I think I'd get her ankle seen by a GP or walk in centre in case the injury is more extensive under the surface.

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 26/04/2025 17:44

And actually plenty think it didn’t need 999 which I take on board!

But the police did think it was a police matter OP, and that's the opinion that matters.

MabelBayleylivesinWigan · 26/04/2025 17:44

YADNBU at all! Ignore the others who think you overreacted. The guy was refusing to give his details, and he was going to leave and was being mouthy. I do not agree with others who say it was ‘dramatic’ to call 999.
Serves the guy right for being a total dick. Maybe he’ll be a lot more careful next time (I doubt it) but you advocated very well for your daughter. And kudos to the police for attending. It could have been a lot more serious, and I really hope your daughter is on the mend. She’ll be upset for a while. Glad you did what you did.

Leafy3 · 26/04/2025 17:43

Absolutely not an overreaction. It would have been a hit & run.

YourFunnyTiger · 26/04/2025 17:43

For those saying op over reacted. What would you have done if it was your child/dog/cherished object?

You did nothing wrong OP, I would have been furious with the guy. Hope your dd is well.

ChoccieCornflake · 26/04/2025 17:42

I would keep a close eye on her injury too, and don't hesitate to seek medical advice if at all worried.

ShortyShorts · 26/04/2025 17:42

Applepe · 26/04/2025 17:39

It’s not an overreaction. You did absolutely the right thing by dialling 999, that’s what it’s there for. He ran over your child’s foot, refused to give his details and became abusive.

The OP hasn't said he became abusive?

"He was mouthing off by saying he hadn’t done anything, when he had clearly run over her foot."

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