To wish people wouldn't judge/grill people who don't drive

Yep. Sometimes I get annoyed at a cyclist's antics but wouldnt say I hate bicycles.

And also relates to other forms of road transport, such as buses, lorries, taxis, van drivers, etc., where idiotic drivers are still problematic!

Pollution fair enough but the rest of what you say relates to the humans driving the cars.

I've tried for years to learn, spent so much money and time but just can't seem to get it for some reason! when i have enough money i will try again but at 42 it seems like it just isn't happening for me. I don't think people judge me although we live in an area where driving is the only reliable way to get anywhere.

Greenfields asked me what it is I don't like about cars. Well, first pollution, Even electric cars have an effect on the environment, the Lithium used in batteries is mined by children in very poor living conditions. Secondly, I like to walk on a pavement, not have to walk around a car on the road, especially if I need my sticks. When my son was little, I had to manouvre the buggy around large cars blocking the pavement. I pulled the buggy behind me so that if anyone was hit it would be me and pretended it was a game so he wouldn't be frightened. I don't like traffic jams, arguments in Supermarket parking bays, people refusing to stop at a pedestrian crossing or shouting at me because I am walking too slowly, drivers shouting at me to get off the road when I am crossing when there is no pedestrian crossing, drivers backing their car into me because they didn't look in their mirrors, drivers revving their engines because I (can only)walk slowly. Tooting horns, revving engines, road rage, fisticuffs at petrol stations.....What is there to like?

Same. I’m in Oxfordshire and the town isn’t rundown and has great commuter links. There are many walking paths and you see people often walking, cycling, and some in wheelchairs and mobility scooters getting around.

I think what is often overlooked is that anyone could find themselves not being able to drive whether that is due to age, disability, finances, injury, illness, etc and I rather be somewhere where a car is an option and know that if my DH, I, or both of us became that way, we could/would still manage without a car.

100% I've lived in towns and smaller cities and never felt I could rely on the buses and trains for my needs, compared to driving. I do get a bit annoyed that the average Joe is made to feel bad for driving (climate change) when so many places dont seem to have adequate public transport.

YANBU. Driving is generally environmentally unfriendly compared to public transport, often more expensive by the time you include lessons, insurance, initial car purchase costs, car maintenance, petrol, parking etc and not regularly needed if you live in a major town or city.

You would only be unreasonable for your own ease of life if you lived rurally (as public transport can be so irregular in small towns or villages that cars are necessary for most) or are asking other people for lifts for some reason rather than taking an uber/taxi when needed.

Exactly. For some "the sensible" option is learning to drive. For others it's choosing to live somewhere with good public transport.

There's no one size fits all. Plus I actually love where I live!

Well that's the other thing then isnt it- what will make you happier- having easy access to buses etc but maybe having to live in a run down area with high crime, or living somewhere nicer but with less buses and trains available. What's the sensible option!

I'm the same as you and I have choices due to various reasons. But unfortunately it's not so easy for plenty of other people. And large parts of the UK do not have good enough public transport options.

I live somewhere with brilliant public transport. I often see people on MN claiming it's the worst place ever to live and they wouldn't live here if they were paid too. OK, slight exaggeration, but it's definitely not "desirable"

I wasn’t lucky. I made a sensible plan, worked hard to make it happen and did well out of it. My life didn’t fall out of the sky into my lap.

Yep, it’s a real privilege to be disabled and not legally allowed to drive. And then having to plan where you live to accommodate your disability. Not being able to drive is the worst thing about my disability but yes, I’m privileged. Ok then.

@dummydimmer what is it you dont like about cars?

Like you say it's a choice. No one has to drive if they dont like it. I like driving and all the upsides to it. Tax and insurance are just once a year. I can actually get to certain places cheaper than on the train. Parking is only a problem if you arent prepared to walk a bit and road rage sometimes happens but you dont have to let if effect you.

Very eloquently put!

Well lots of people cant just pick and choose where they live. So I would never say- oh yes I chose to live somewhere with great public transport- I made a sensible decision. You were lucky that you could move to wherever you wanted. I'm lucky that I can afford to drive and own a car, that I dont have health reasons for not being able to drive and that I have the ability to drive.

I don't drive,never learnt for various reasons. The only place I feel negatively judged about it is on Mumsnet! People assume that I must always be scrounging lifts off friends and family. I don't,the only time I get a lift anywhere is with my daughter when she and her DH take me to do a big food shop occasionally,but they are going shopping themselves anyway. I have a disabled Freedom Pass which I use on buses and trains and it gets me more or less anywhere I need to go. Besides which, due to my financial situation now (living on disability benefits) I doubt I would be able to afford to run a car!

There's no law that says people have to drive. If everyone drove a car, the environment would suffer. I won't drive.It's not an illness and I don't apologise. I hate driving and actually don't like cars. I don't ask for lifts, I use public transport and walk. Taxis late at night. People well meaning feel sorry for me, I just tell them that I don't need to worry about road tax, insurance, petrol prices, finding a parking spot and all the agro of road rage. Not to mention polluting the planet. I'm a fully functioning adult, I just don't drive!

YANBU

I don’t like driving, get car sick just being in the car due to the windy roads, and I’m only in the car maybe 10 times a year. I can go months without being in a car. I live in a commuter town with buses going to Cambridge, Oxford, and Milton Keynes. Trains going to London, Oxford, and Birmingham which then connect to other cities. I have four food shops within 15 minutes walking distance. I have a bus stop into town and one to Oxford less than three blocks away from our home. The kids’ school is is a 7 minute walk and there’s two daycares across the street from the school. The surgery is less than a 15 minute walk. Even in the winter time, it’s faster for me to walk our son to school than DH driving him because DH has to warm the car up and defrost the windows and in the time it takes him to do all that, find a spot, and walk him to school, it is more than me walking him there. It would be silly for me to get in the car to drive when I can walk and not take up a parking spot for someone else nor do I think we need more cars on the road.

One of my son’s school helpers mentioned she saw me walking to Aldi’s with two of my children and said I should drive. It’s only 1.4 miles away and it is a lovely walk (all pavement) where I can stop part of the way through a park and let the kids play. I’d take the bus to work and parking was a ball ache for those who drove.

I don’t ask for rides, DH offers but I rather walk. The weather is rarely horrendous enough that I can’t, get fresh air and some exercise that I wouldn’t get if I just drove everywhere.

Apart from the points I made earlier about family and jobs, somewhere with great bus services, trains, trams, tubes etc will be a more desirable place to live. Some people might not be able to afford to move there. It's not that they made a bad decision.

I don’t agree with this. A lot of very affluent areas aren’t well served for public transport at all, because the assumption is the demand isn’t there as everyone can afford cars. (I grew up in an area just like this.) It’s often areas that might be considered less desirable that are well served, as car ownership is lower.

I could say I made the most sensible decision by learning to drive and owning a car as it means I can live anywhere- countryside, village, town or city. I can use public transport if I want or use my own transport. But I wouldn't describe it as the sensible decision as that's smug and condescending.

There’s “a sensible decision” and “the sensible decision”. Your decision made sense - but that doesn’t make it the only sensible option. What I am saying, and I don’t know how to make it any clearer if you simply refuse to get it, is that it would be a sensible decision to pick an area well served by public transport if you can’t drive and don’t intend to learn. It’s not “lucky” or a “privilege”.

Apart from the points I made earlier about family and jobs, somewhere with great bus services, trains, trams, tubes etc will be a more desirable place to live. Some people might not be able to afford to move there. It's not that they made a bad decision.

I could say I made the most sensible decision by learning to drive and owning a car as it means I can live anywhere- countryside, village, town or city. I can use public transport if I want or use my own transport. But I wouldn't describe it as the sensible decision as that's smug and condescending.

But they did make a decision. Why are you trying to pretend this isn’t the case?

Yes but only because it was an option available to you. If someone doesnt live somewhere where there are great buses, trains etc it's not necessarily because they made a stupid decision.

But it WAS a sensible decision. Certain posters have been trying to suggest that it’s sheer dumb luck if you end up in an area where there’s good public transport. It isn’t. I planned it.