Would you do this to ensure your dc could go to a good private school?

Isn’t a class of 6-8 just as likely in a state school for physics A level? 😂

In what way are you seeing them as bad schools? Is it mainly from looking at SATs results or Ofsted etc? The reason I ask is I worked for about 15 years as a primary school teacher and have worked in many different schools and often the ones with poor SATs etc are some of the loveliest schools I've been to and vice versa. Have you visited the schools when children are in to see how they feel?

Personally I sent DC to state primary (it was a good used to be outstanding one) then on to a secondary private. I think in the teen years peers are very important and with DD especially I didn't want her becoming introverted and not confident because of the mixed sex environment. For us it has been worth no holidays and an old car and using savings/inheritance but we are lucky that we inherited a house so have no mortgage. I do think paying off the mortgage is key to being more relaxed about it, especially with the VAT rises on top of the usual rises per year.

State Primary is fine as long as the schools aren't really awful and then you can go for Private from Y7 if necessary
We did this and I think that State primary actually did them a lot of good and certainly no harm when transitioning to Private Secondary.

If you are reasonable educated yourself I think private primary is a terrible waste of time.

I'd pay off my mortgage and channel the extra money into lots of lovely activities with plenty of books and crafts. Develop her love of learning.

I personally think years 7-11 is the best time to go private.

Does she need private at primary? Why not just go private for secondary? Use the difference to pay towards the house

The money is there ready and waiting. If you are confident in the school then stick with the plan.

Where is this £150k savings held? If you convert your mortgage to an offset, using these savings, but keep paying into your mortgage as much as you do already (or more if possible) then the section of your savings that are earmarked to not be needed for 3-14 years will do wonders for paying off your mortgage early. You get to have your cake and eat it too.

I'm a single mum but my ds aged 10, decided he wanted to try for a scholarship at a local independent. He won it, so I have scrimped and saved for the last 6 years to allow him to attend.

It has been worth every penny. Like you, our local state school was failing and had all sorts of issues. Even Ofsted said it wasn't safe.

Instead, ds has spent 6 years in a calm, supportive environment with small class sizes and good facilities. he has 10 good GCSEs and is in a tiny class taking STEM a'levels. He is confident, cheerful and enjoying himself. I'll spend money on me once he's got his A'levels.

Perhaps you could look at a compromise. Try for a scholarship place at a later age, and split the funds between schooling and mortgage. £150k for one child and that's just your half, sounds like you have money to spare.

When you are in a private school class of 6-8 pupils taking a-level physics, it makes a massive difference.

it is way easier to supplement state primary to get the student into high sets at private secondary than it is to supplement a-levels to the equivalent of the tiny classes

DS has just started at a private school after being in a good state primary until Year 5. He was ahead in some subjects, needed to catch up in others...save your money for secondary as that's when the difference between state and indie is really noticeable.

The saving you've done to enable this for your DD is amazing, don't junk it all now to pay off the mortgage...put some towards that so you can go part-time maybe, but definitely don't waste the lovely fund you have built up.

What would your family say if you used the £80k they gifted you for her education to pay your mortgage off?

I’d save some money and not send her until secondary school tbh.

Private schools at primary level are not worth the cost. I'd pay off you mortgage and make sure she gets all the extra curricular she wants. People think that schooling makes the difference, when it's parents who really do.

Why would you run out of money though? If you have saved 70k in like 4 years surely half the fees each year from your salary would be a non issue? Particularly the first half at primary.

But the schools are bad. Not even ok.

Have you looked at out of school provision in the state schools? Our (state) primary is not great in terms of hours and booking but I'm just moving my youngest to private and the provision is so much better, more flexible and free which may be another factor to consider.

This is what I would suggest, keep working because you will need money.

And go state school primary and let that money grow, along with her Dad's contributions, perhaps, whilst he is still on board because he might change his mind, get his cash and yours put into some sort of trust fund that neither of you can spend on anything else, and let it build up for secondary.

Mortgages, even the higher rate, are still quite low borrowing fees.

38 in a state primary is very unusual. Round here the numbers are dropping for primary admissions.

id start her in state until at least 8 - save a fortune

I would continue saving and do state until eight and move her then

I think the accepted wisdom that state for primary and private for secondary is debatable. Turn that on its head and your child gets arguably a better education and probably smaller class sizes, more individual attention etc in their early, formative years. The theory goes that when they then go on to state secondary they are well set up to go straight into the top sets. You will probably then have some spare cash for enrichment/tutoring when those things really make a difference (eg to GCSE results or future direction). I hear what you're saying about wanting to pay off the mortgage and take a step down, though. Remember that your happiness impacts your child's happiness hugely, as well as being important in its own right. Being present and happy, with your child at a state school is vastly preferable to being strung out and over busy but having your child in a private school.

You have plenty of time to pay off your mortgage.

And - presumably the ‘family help’ is for her education, not to allow you to be mortgage free at 39 so you can have a slightly more relaxed life?

Edit: is she only 4? If so, how have you saved up £150k in four years? That sounds like you can probably just afford the education or to pay off your mortgage quickly anyway.

So if your child hasn’t started school yet why can’t you pay off your mortgage and pay private school as you go? If you’ve saved 150k in just a handful of years and the child’s father would pay have the fees I don’t understand how it’s one or the other.

I went to an ‘awful’ secondary school and loved it! Even the ‘worst’ schools cater for hard working, committed pupils. I was in top set, joined all clubs / activities, played instruments etc this was because my parents brought me up properly and I valued school. The worst parts of the school just didn’t touch me. Instil a good work ethic in your DD, pay for tutoring if you need to. But don’t be too worried about ‘bad’ schools.

Start with state and keep hold of the money in case it doesn’t work out. You’ll need at least double your current savings to take her all the way through to 18 in private. “State ‘till 8” is a very popular option round here, you could try that?