What is fair re:money to grandchildren

Yes, it's just so potentially fraught if you can't be absolutely positively definite that no more GC could ever be born - that's assuming that you want all of your eventual GC to benefit equally.

In an extreme example, US President John Tyler, who was born in 1790 and died in 1862, probably would never have expected to have a grandson who is still alive in 2025!

My Sdad told me that he has left myself and my brother the same (small) amount fo money in his will for us to give to our DC. He has done that despite my brother having 3 DC and me having 2.
I don't expect anything but its very nice of him and I wouldn't care if he had done it by child even though as a family we would have got less.
Entirely up to him

I'm one of 3 cousins are 4, and each family got the same, that was fair enough too, but either by family or by child the same.

Hmm, this is interesting. I know my parents have set up savings accounts for all their grandchildren, and regularly pay into them - no idea how much, might be £10 every week or £10 just on birthdays. I do wonder how the accounts compare, as my eldest brother’s kids are almost adults and mine are the youngest by several years, so I assume that DD (3) has by far the smallest amount in her account, and don’t expect my parents to top hers up to match her 17yo cousin. I’m not sure they could afford to even if they wanted to!

I’d assume the only way you could look after unborn grandchildren would be a trust. Other than that an estate has to be distributed at a point in time.

Very good point.

Im sure there are lots of situations where it would make more sense to give money directly to GC.

Money left to the grandchildren will always be theirs. The downside of leaving everything to the next generation is that if they get divorced, their partner can walk away with half the money that you left to your child.

Which is why I personally am in favour of only leaving to your own children.

That way, all grandchildren will eventually inherit whatever is left from their GPs via their parents, with none left out.

I know that it's absurd to expect it to work leaving money to potentially as-yet-unborn GC; but I doubt that most GPs would deliberately want to exclude any of their GC - because they are their GC - even if they don't live long enough to ever meet them.

I’m not sure what ROI girls bring that boys don’t. I didn’t realise raising kids was an investment TBH

Grandchildren born after the death of a grandchild can’t inherit, that’s madness.

Grandchildren born after the will has been made - easy, include a provision for “all of my grandchildren, including but not necessarily limited to the following…”

But people who didn’t even exist at the point someone dies? Don’t be daft. The estate cannot be sitting in limbo until everyone is through menopause or has had a vasectomy, for goodness sake. The parents can make things “fair” through their share if they feel it needs doing.

I know exactly how I will leave money to all my grandkids and I assure you that it would be equal and fair - same amount to all because I love them as equally.

Someone I know left money to be put in a trust for the benefit of her grandchildren. She died young, and at the time of her death, there was only one grandchild.

I don't know if the will was badly written, or the trust fund wasn't set up properly, but all the money went to the first grandchild and the 3 GCs her younger 2 children subsequently had got nothing. It was invested well, too, and by the time that first grandchild was 21, it was enough for him to buy a house in Brighton with only a 25% mortgage.

Her husband is still alive, and very comfortably off, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if his will did something to try and redress the balance, especially as the first grandchild's mother is absolutely loaded and has a life-limiting illness.

To this this is the most logical way of approaching it. GC are not a limb of their parents, they are people in their own right. So if you have 4/5 GC it doesn’t matter whose kids they are, you simply have 4/5 GC.

I have one of each, should I start neglecting the boy one as there is no ROI apparently?!

The grandchildren should be treated equally, I think your take on it is a little odd. You and your brother should also receive the same inheritance.

WTAF.

It’s not the fault of the GC that they have siblings. They should all get the same.

I actually think he needs to reduce the amount being given to the older dc. He may need to do that significantly, or top up the pot of the younger children with lump sums as and when he can.

Otherwise, eventually the oldest will have substantially more just for being older.

Ideally when he dies or on turning 18, his grandchildren should have very similar savings pots.

They grow up into men 😂

Theres no ROI on them compared to girls.

I treat all my GC equally. They are all people in their own right, with their own relationships with me, that exist aside from my relationships with their parents. I can't imagine a situation where I would divide what I gave three ways because I have three children meaning those GC with siblings got less. That to me would be grossly unfair.

WTF? What’s wrong with boys?

They’re keen for a boy? Yack, they must be out of their minds!

Don't be daft. All GC get the same if he can't afford it then all GC get it reduced or stopped

I find it interesting that in these type of threads people often treat gifts to GC as akin to gifts to the children.

IMO that confuses things and isn’t correct.

Each GC is a person, and each is a relation of their grandparent in their own right.

So OP you are essentially asking should my brother & I be treated the same when it comes to gifts. Therefore my child gets 50% and other kids get 50% spilt. While I completely see the logic, I think the slightly better logic is that your dad gives all his GC the same.

Gifts to you and your brother directly I would hope save for valid reason would be equal.

Do you think your grief at not having more children has been triggered by your brother having 3 and talking of more and the impact it has on daughters gift?

I think your emotions are very understandable .

I agree with this. Inheritance and savings are totally different. Inheritance is to the children
Savings are specifically to gc.

My mothers Will says her inheritance is split equally between her 4 children. If they predecease her each child's share gets split between that child's children.

So if my sibling with 1 child dies before dm that child gets 1 quarter of her estate.

If my sibling with 2 children dies first his children only get a half of a quarter each.

But if my mother set up savings funds fir all gc they would each get the same.

Ever grandchild should get the same amount, whether that’s £1 each or £10,000 each etc.

It’s absolutely nothing to do with how many children you and your DB have, and no, your DD should not get more than her cousins.

Think yourself lucky you’ve got such a generous DF.