Weird and offensive or I am overreacting?

Exactly, there was a massive drip feed mid thread so it's not surprising people are reacting to the initial OP

That's how I would take it too!

Tbf the OP’s posts since the initial one have totally changed the dynamic imo.

texts from the car, messages all day long. Honestly I think I am at work paid to do a job and I would like to get on with it. If I suggest I am busy he gets offended.

Ugh, see this is a bit of a drip feed!
YANBU here, that would be annoying and controlling.
I'd be worried he was going to send a barber shops quartet to your workplace or bring a picnic.
Which is never ok, unless maybe you're a park ranger.

I was going to say YANBU and reply "Who d'is??" 😂

On reading the messages though and with context it just seems like a clumsily worded attempt at a bit of humour, as he's packed you a lunch up to take with you.
Trouble with texting is that it's not always easy to convey tone and can be taken the wrong way.

If I got that message from my partner I'd just send a jokey message in response, or at the very most 'What does that mean? 😂' and then get on with my day. I wouldn't get all pissy and start analysing it for hours at a time.

Honestly, you sound a bit exhausting.

No she did not.

Her senses are heightened, because I'll guess, he has form for being a total nightmare. This I will almost certainly say,is part of a long standing pattern of communication style from him.

I thought it was really weird and your follow up posts confirm it.

Everyone thought I was nuts, he was such a lovely man etc. It was dragging me down and that wasn't lovely.

No she didn't
If you check her subsequent posts her H is controlling and jealous in general

I think all of this is weird.

You totally over reacted

I have every sympathy, sounds like my ex. He was paranoid as I gained qualifications and promotions and got more and more clingy but also digs and eventually accusations.

One example was when I was studying for a professional qualification and got a fantastic result on a piece of work, I was so pleased as someone who left school at 15 with no qualifications and his putdown was "Did you have to sleep with him to get that?" I pointed out that it was a she not a he and he shrugged and said he didn't realise I was into women.

A few months later we had a massive row and he left me. I think he thought I'd beg him to come back but I didn't, then he said he was coming back and I said no, I was going to leave you when the kids left school but you've already put them through the upheaval so there's no going back. It was a good decision.

Good luck, think carefully about what you want.

I bet he is allowed have a teams call with female work colleagues without interruption.

You should have responded "remember you ve got a wife" 😆😆😆🕍

Who happen to be male.

He wouldn't care if it was Sally from accounting. But Sam is a different matter

There’s a difference in my husband makes my lunch for me daily because he knows I don’t have time/can’t be bothered and I don’t like the canteen. Or my husband makes me lunch I don’t want just to stop me spending time with my work colleagues.

Dear god!

Wake up!

I am right with the 'controlling' assessment.

Argh, OP NOOOOO.

I implore you to ignore these ridiculous posts saying you're over reacting etc.

The message is incredibly, blindingly Passive Aggressive. It is appalling to me when people say so much yet say nothing to clarify. And then tell you you're being sensitive or over reacting.

OP, I assure you this is not ok.

Why can't he simply communicate with you how he feels? Why can't he tell you what he needs? Why that.

If you feel in your senses he's doing this regularly - I assure you, you are correct.

So you have to ask him. In person. What's going on husband? What's this about?

If he dares go down the you're over reacting/ what are you talking about line - you're in trouble with this guy.

“Remember you have a husband” is condescending and makes it sound that you don’t appreciate him or that you might sleep with someone else by accident 🙄 at the bare minimum it’s passive aggressive as he’s saying you should appreciate me more and doing something nice for someone should be it’s own reward. Quite honestly he sounds exhausting.

Well, if anyone sounds 'controlling' it's not @RememberThatGuy...

I voted yabu just from your first post. However reading your follow ups I change my mind. Only you know him and know his intentions. Trust your gut. And tell him to stop making lunch!! Or dump it and go to the canteen.

No thats not why he thinks you overreact.

He is passive aggressive and when you openly challenge him he tries to backtrack and make our you're the one being unreasonable or sensitive.

It is very destabilising trying to deal with someone who is PA. They never say what they mean and you're left with a constant underlying anxiety.

You need to start taking him at his literal word, don't appear to second guess at any alternative meanings and force him to be more direct.

It's either a struggle for him to communicate directly or an intentional tactic to make you feel anxious.