Page 12 | Cheap chocolate and presents from MIL

nottheplan · 2025-04-23T15:15:27+00:00

Mil and dhs family always buy rubbish presents and easter chocolate for our dcs. We're talking rotten own brand chocolate that nobody likes. It just gets chucked in the bin. Also cheap plastic toys from b&m in the 2 for £20 offer for birthdays and Christmas. Always break into pieces and get chucked in the bin. They are most definitely not poor. Wibu to ask them not to buy anymore for our dcs? If I phrase it that they have too much already and were trying to cut down on toys and treats?

ItGhoul · 23/04/2025 17:05

My god, you and your kids sound like an ungrateful, spoilt bunch.

Whattodo1610 · 23/04/2025 17:04

Allseeingallknowing · 23/04/2025 17:02

Agree - Aldi and Lidl chocolate is better!

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You might prefer it .. but if her dc don’t eat it then it’s clearly not preferable to them.

Oneearringlost · 23/04/2025 17:04

I think that would be a very, very hurtful thing for you to do, OP.

DramaQueenlady · 23/04/2025 17:03

Some b&m toys are perfectly fine. Hashy children will break even the most expensive toys

LovelyCupOfTeaThankYou · 23/04/2025 17:02

This is not your decision. These gifts have been bought for your children from their grandparents. Therefore, it should be up to your children whether these toys are binned or not.

Telling your children that you are binning gifts from their grandparents is just mean, controlling and interfering. Telling your in-laws their gifts are not good enough is just really mean.

Allseeingallknowing · 23/04/2025 17:02

Oldmothershrubboard · 23/04/2025 16:52

You are being massively unreasonable to complain about receiving chocolate. The cheap stuff is often actually better than Cadbury etc.

If you don't want plastic tat then rather than telling people not to buy it, say the DC really want a specific book series.

Agree - Aldi and Lidl chocolate is better!

1stTimeDad · 23/04/2025 16:59

I think people are being a bit mean here to the OP. Only the OP knows her in laws. I think this is more of a question around her in-laws being perceived as unnecessarily tight. Not a lack of appreciation of the thought in general.

Some people do treat kids as second class and gift them things they wouldn’t buy for themselves. If it is the a case that they wouldn’t buy supermarket chocolate for themselves selves, then yes they are being mean but there is little you can say about it. You either graciously receive it and then give it away. Or say no thank in advance of further gifts.

PinkyFlamingo · 23/04/2025 16:59

nottheplan · 23/04/2025 16:42

I'm not saying it's inedible. The kids try it, don't like it and it gets left there. What's wrong with a Cadburys or Nestlé eggs? They are always eaten.

Edited

Exactly what "cheap chocolate" are you talking g about? Even the Molly's brand from Tesco is actually nice

saveforthat · 23/04/2025 16:56

CurlewKate · 23/04/2025 16:50

Just tell them you don’t want cheap things. They’re in-laws, it’s not as though they are real people with feelings that might be hurt or anything.

Yeah and there is another thread running now dedicated to inlaw bashing. Why not post on there and everyone will agree with you.

AliasGrape · 23/04/2025 16:56

I don’t think all the b&m 2 for 20 toys break within weeks do they? DD has a b&m dolls pushchair that’s still going strong after 2 and half years (and it’s been well used!), plus a little plastic kitchen in a carry case that is still one of her favourite things, and likewise a £5 plastic teaset which came from wilko on her first birthday and has been one of the best things we ever got her.

Can you give more specific suggestions for what they would like? Stuff like animal or dinosaur figures for example should be pretty umbreakable, the plastic play food is fairly open ended, or steer them towards craft stuff and things that get used up and you don’t have to keep indefinitely?

Otherwise you can still donate toys or offer on your local Facebook thrift page?

Nc500again · 23/04/2025 16:54

Well my DM does stuff like this, and it’s something we love about her - I don’t think it looks like crap to her it looks like good enough fun. We have a good natured family joke about what my mum will give them this time. Why would you accept your kids feeling unloved over some cheap chocolates? Bizarre.

get them to do an eco project and ask granny to ban plastic toys but this is a tiny deal.

Oldmothershrubboard · 23/04/2025 16:54

nottheplan · 23/04/2025 16:51

Yes thank you. There's no thought put in compared to what my parents buy. Mil especially likes nice things like restaurant or hotel vouchers so I can't understand her reasoning!

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What child wants hotel vouchers?

Oldmothershrubboard · 23/04/2025 16:52

You are being massively unreasonable to complain about receiving chocolate. The cheap stuff is often actually better than Cadbury etc.

If you don't want plastic tat then rather than telling people not to buy it, say the DC really want a specific book series.

Original poster

nottheplan · 23/04/2025 16:51

Whattodo1610 · 23/04/2025 16:48

We always had the same with our IL’s. It was annoying but I just accepted graciously binned it when appropriate. The sad thing though was when the kids realised it was just cheap shite and felt kind of unloved. I just kept being positive outwardly until they were old enough for me to agree yeh it’s shit 🤷‍♀️

Yes thank you. There's no thought put in compared to what my parents buy. Mil especially likes nice things like restaurant or hotel vouchers so I can't understand her reasoning!

OP posts:

CurlewKate · 23/04/2025 16:50

Just tell them you don’t want cheap things. They’re in-laws, it’s not as though they are real people with feelings that might be hurt or anything.

OMGitsnotgood · 23/04/2025 16:49

WeHaveTheRabbit · 23/04/2025 16:46

No, you absolutely cannot tell your MIL you've disposed of her gifts. It would be mean-spirited in the extreme.

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The ‘then tell her’ comment was tongue in cheek. But the OP has already shown themselves to be mean spirited so not sure that makes much difference.

Eggsinthewhoopsiebasketalready · 23/04/2025 16:49

Next visit to ils take the tat and leave it there so dc have something to do next visit....

LovingLurker · 23/04/2025 16:48

Some children have no toys or food and would highly appreciate that stuff you want to bin , even if you see it as cheap. Throwing it away is incredibly wasteful.

Whattodo1610 · 23/04/2025 16:48

We always had the same with our IL’s. It was annoying but I just accepted graciously binned it when appropriate. The sad thing though was when the kids realised it was just cheap shite and felt kind of unloved. I just kept being positive outwardly until they were old enough for me to agree yeh it’s shit 🤷‍♀️

phoenixrosehere · 23/04/2025 16:47

You could tell them not to, whether they listen or not, is something else entirely.

MIL asked if we wanted ours to have any chocolate and we’ve said no and we have been listened to. Other families members did gift them some chocolate but we put it in the treat tin at MIL where it will be eaten by nieces and nephews.

Our oldest rarely eats chocolate, middle prefers gummies, youngest is too young, DH likes the occasional wisps , and I’m not keen on chocolate.

WeHaveTheRabbit · 23/04/2025 16:46

OMGitsnotgood · 23/04/2025 16:43

Chocolate to a food bank, toys to a charity shop. Then tell MIL what you’ve done with them and hopefully she will get the message.

No, you absolutely cannot tell your MIL you've disposed of her gifts. It would be mean-spirited in the extreme.

wowwhataday · 23/04/2025 16:45

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Breadcat24 · 23/04/2025 16:45

Some supermarket chocolate does not contain palm oil- cadburys and nestle do. Maybe consider the ethics?

takealettermsjones · 23/04/2025 16:44

ComtesseDeSpair · 23/04/2025 16:43

Honestly, your children sound equally unappreciative and unable to see the value of their things if they constantly break their toys within hours of receiving them. Unless they’re toddlers who don’t know any better, even “cheap” toys can withstand normal play.

This. Teach them to be careful!

ComtesseDeSpair · 23/04/2025 16:43

Honestly, your children sound equally unappreciative and unable to see the value of their things if they constantly break their toys within hours of receiving them. Unless they’re toddlers who don’t know any better, even “cheap” toys can withstand normal play.