To think my friend overreacted? Air BNB situation

She paid her money the same as you so fully entitled to use ALL facilities.
Did you always use the upstairs toilet ? Probably not.
If I was your friend I’d be pissed of with you as welll, monitoring were I pee. It’s like being back at school having to justify to the teacher why you need to be let out of class to the toilet.

Your friend paid half the fee to sleep on a sofa bed while you get your on bedroom. You dictated to your friend what toilet dhe shoild use before leaving. What kind of a friend are you?

You sound controlling and no doubt used your health condition to ensure you got the bedroom. Your friend shoild not have paid half for having to sleep on a sofa bed in a communal area.

You should have booked a 2 bedroom Air BNB.

The least you can do is apologise to your friend for your behaviour and how you treated her. It was her night away too and you made it all about you.

YABU.

Also, I bet if she tried to do the same thing to you you'd hate it. What makes you better than her?

I don't understand why anyone uses air bnbs any more with all of these ridiculous stipulations! Fuck having to waste precious holiday time doing a deep clean as you are terrified that the host may rate you down. Air bnb's are mostly the same price as hotels these days, why on earth would you bother yourself with the extra stress?

I had a friend like you once. Had. She still thinks I'm unreasonable and has zero awareness of how much she was trying to dictate my actions all the time. Are you her?

Yes YABU, you were rude and insulting. It is a social norm that you would use a bathroom, whether at an Air BNB, a hotel, a friend’s house, wherever, and leave it looking like you haven’t even been in there. You have blatantly told your friend that you think she is unaware of and/or doesn’t follow social norms.

As for the cost of the accommodation, she didn’t ask if she could pay less than half because you got the bedroom, because it would have been rude of her to say that. It would have been polite of you to offer to pay more than half.

Sorry you are acting so unreasonably. You have answers for everything people are trying to say. You clearly think you are in the right. You say right here that you get disability benefits so need the (let's face it) better setup yet you don't offer to pay any more. This is all before you made your friend leave the place spotless and then dictate which toilets she is allowed to use. I'm surprised she has been on more than one trip with you and can't believe she still wants to be friends. You are not being a nice person let alone a friend.

Your friend was understanding about your need for your own bedroom and a bathroom. She took the sofa bed - always a gamble in terms of comfort.

You were not only not understanding but positively rude and controlling in return about her need for a bathroom.

If she was paying half then she had equal rights to use the facilities without your “permission”.
I suspect your request for the sole use of the better sleeping and bathroom facilities was tolerated but the denial of being able to use the upstairs bathroom at the end was the final straw.

Super weird & controlling. She’s a adult, not a kid and you’ve just treated her like she’s a toddler.

This.

Also you were just being controlling as both toilets would reflect on your account surely.
The cleaner coming in to make the beds doesn’t know who used which bathroom anyway.

YABU. That was mean, treating her as if she were going to make the bathroom unclean. I’d have been pissed off.

What has that got to do with your childsplaning your friend?

YABVU.

You don't get to tell any adult where to use the loo in rented accommodation that you're just about to leave.

Nothing about what you requested in this interaction was normal.

TBH I have toilets /bathroom that I prefer when I am on my period. I prefer a bathroom as I have slightly more space to put stuff down on clean surfaces etc.

If you were that paranoid that she couldn't use a loo properly after she used it all you needed to say was
'I've just cleaned it, please could you squirt some bleach down there after you've used it'

I think you're lucky to have a friend who is willing to come with you on breaks.
I wouldn't.

I thought this must be a reverse but from your replies seems not. Your not going to concede on this, even though it's unaminois. Prepare to lose a friend.

YBU

The cleaning fee is quite high on air bnbs. I leave the place tidy but no way would I clean it.

1. You pay a cleaning fee to air BnB, they will be cleaning that toilet before the next guest checks in. Even if you leave it tidy and free of shit stains, you don't need to clean it.
2. She would be checking and/ or cleaning any toilet she used, whether it was upstairs or downstairs, either one being left in a state may affect your rating- Airbnb wouldn't care if you said my friend used the mucky one.
3. Even though you agreed you would split, you haven't paid for sole use of upstairs
4. You think your friend has very low standards

Yes you were rude and intrusive about the toilet thing. Also theres no need to clean Airbnb places, you pay an extra fee for cleaning. Just throw away any rubbish and leave tidy.

Yes

Sadly, your rating and comfort seems to have been prioritised over your friend’s needs.

I rather think this is a thread that will run for pges and pages, each telling the OP she is rather selfish, and ridiculously obsessed with lavatory cleaning to the extent she dictates the lavatory usage of friends, yet the responses from OP will ne 'no I'm not', or will stop at page 3...

@userfriendly55

Am I reading it correctly - that you had a bedroom and bathroom, and your friend had a sofa bed and just a toilet?
Did she get to use the upstairs bathroom at all - for getting ready/brushing teeth etc?
I think the way to resolve this is to apologise and to recognise that your friend didn’t get £120’s worth - and to gift/offer to compensate.

People quite often ‘agree’ because they are being polite, kind or don’t want to cause a scene. The final straw for her must have been being told she couldn’t use a bathroom in case she left it dirty.

Sorry, wrong post.