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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think on a scale of 1-10 - how ‘Mumsnet’ is this?

33 replies

Corditer · 22/04/2025 10:32

rough council estate upbringing
rough school - full of violence
no education qualifications to speak of

completely uneducated likely illiterate parents

no education qualifications between the 6 siblings

Fathers fav pastime is local pub

Parents wear obviously working class clothing - father wears chunky cygnet ring etc

Strong regional accent and incorrect grammar - double negatives etc

This was my DP’s upbringing. However his niece was so different - private school - first class Degree from uni etc.

So it just goes to show what can change in a single generation!!

I love the fact my DP is old school working class! But also like the broader horizons middle class life often brings - his niece being a young graduate has had an interesting career thus far…

But what was the reckoning on massive salads appearing in my DP’s childhood?! 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Corditer · 22/04/2025 10:57

HelenaWaiting · 22/04/2025 10:40

I am also proper working class, but went to Cambridge. It doesn't stop me loving my family or being proud of my roots. It does stop me stereotyping the working-class. You sound a bit snobby, tbf, OP.

Thing is what I’ve stated about my DPs upbringing are facts about his family not stereotypes.

I’d rather spend time with him than the middle class people from my neighbourhood any day who were very narrow minded, boring, etc etc

OP posts:
Original poster
Corditer · 22/04/2025 10:53

SchnizelVonKrumm · 22/04/2025 10:47

Not quite sure what you mean, but if you are talking about competitive one-upmanship about who has come the furthest from the most WC background (à la 3 Yorkshiremen) this is very Mumsnet.

No .. to be honest no competition here - just a bit of light heartedness and relaxed observation

OP posts:
SchnizelVonKrumm · 22/04/2025 10:47

Not quite sure what you mean, but if you are talking about competitive one-upmanship about who has come the furthest from the most WC background (à la 3 Yorkshiremen) this is very Mumsnet.

Original poster
Corditer · 22/04/2025 10:45

Pentimenti · 22/04/2025 10:37

I’m not sure what you’re asking — your niece has had a good education, unlike at least one of her parents. That doesn’t necessarily mean she’s magically middle-class.

I’m WC, my dad is a retired bin man, my mother a retired cleaner, both from very poor backgrounds, neither stayed in school past the age of 13, and struggled with basic literacy. My siblings and my upbringing was very impoverished. I went to Oxford. I’m still WC, just educated WC. DS is having a very different childhood and will have more opportunities.

My Dad went to Cambridge from a WC background.

He married my mum who was a Doctor.

My Mum used to whisk me off on package holidays that were full of WC kids from uneducated backgrounds. To cut a long story short - I felt much more at home with these WC kids than the MC kids I went to school with - the latter I just felt were irritating and precious while the WC kids accepted me for who I was, I felt.

Class is a funny old thing, and not necessarily as cut and dried as we’d like to think

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 22/04/2025 10:42

One of the things I find fascinating on Who Do You Think You Are is how completely a family’s status/finances/class can change in just a couple of generactions - in both directions.

Smallmercies · 22/04/2025 10:42

Love the cygnet ring - bet they swan around showing it off!

ducks

HelenaWaiting · 22/04/2025 10:40

I am also proper working class, but went to Cambridge. It doesn't stop me loving my family or being proud of my roots. It does stop me stereotyping the working-class. You sound a bit snobby, tbf, OP.

Pentimenti · 22/04/2025 10:37

I’m not sure what you’re asking — your niece has had a good education, unlike at least one of her parents. That doesn’t necessarily mean she’s magically middle-class.

I’m WC, my dad is a retired bin man, my mother a retired cleaner, both from very poor backgrounds, neither stayed in school past the age of 13, and struggled with basic literacy. My siblings and my upbringing was very impoverished. I went to Oxford. I’m still WC, just educated WC. DS is having a very different childhood and will have more opportunities.

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