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Original poster

To cancel our summer holiday because of snoring

82 replies

Toastedpickle · 21/04/2025 21:56

Just been away with DH and kids. His snoring meant that I have come back exhausted. I booked a three bedroom place so that I could sleep in a different room but, due to the layout of the house and the excessive noise he makes, I could still hear every snort despite ear plugs.

We are due to go on holiday again the summer for a week but I just can’t do it. I get so anxious about going away nowadays purely for this, worrying that where we stay will have thin walls or that it will keep the kids awake. It costs more having to get the extra room. I also hate sleeping on my own in a strange house. We don’t share a bed at home anymore and it’s so lonely. I’m on a pull up bed in the spare room which isn’t ideal.

yabu - get over it / don’t cancel holiday
yanbu - snoring is hell / cancel holiday

OP posts:
CosyLemur · 22/04/2025 13:24

My partner snores! There's absolutely nothing he can do about it, we've had sleep tests etc endless medical appointments. It's just how his body flops when he's asleep - theres no way on earth I'd punish him by cancelling a holiday because his body works differently to mine!
And yes we've tried the mouth things they made him louder!

melsid · 22/04/2025 13:10

Use wax ear plugs. I do and have for years. My husbands snoring is horrendous. Bearable with wax plugs

Ponoka7 · 22/04/2025 13:07

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 22:19

You have no idea it’s sleep apnoea.

Show quote history

Neither dies the OP, which is why they need an appointment. That level of snoring isn't within the usual level.

BuildbyNumbere · 22/04/2025 13:06

He needs to see his doctor, snoring means he is not breathing properly while asleep.

MiniPumpkin · 21/04/2025 23:45

Don’t cancel yet, think it over. You will be sleep deprived right now.
i totally sympathise with you. My dh has always been a loud snorer. I recently took myself into the spare room and I do t think I moved all night. I couldn’t believe it. Tried another few nights in with dh and woke up about 10 times so I’m back to my spare room.
dh doesn’t have sleep apnoea but possibly weight increases snoring. My situation isn’t as bad as yours. I hope you find a solution x

BombayBicycleclub · 21/04/2025 23:42

Try playing brown noise with deep base over the top of the ear plugs via headphones. I can’t hear DH when I do this. He is skinny but has a deviated septum so snores
like a train

BruFord · 21/04/2025 23:36

Darkclothes · 21/04/2025 23:08

No- Not everyone that snores has obstructive sleep apnoea. Other causes can be the anatomical shape of the nose/soft palate/throat etc Some can be treated via ENT, not all, but many. Someone that only started snoring later in life and potentially after gaining weight (not always) should always be checked for sleep apnoea!

Show quote history

@Darkclothes Yes, it was definitely worth getting tested to rule it out.

I wish I could work out why I’ve started snoring, I haven’t gained weight, for example, it just started out of nowhere and it's embarrassing! At least side sleeping stops it right now.

SundayFundayz · 21/04/2025 23:26

I was the snorer in our relationship, and it took trying out a few but I eventually found a mouthguard that stopped it completely. I got mine from vitalsleep but there are lots out there. I would ask him to try and get used to something like that now, to make the holiday bearable!
side note… I’ve now lost 3 stone and stopped snoring totally. That’s not always the cause but it appears to have been in my situation!

Pyjamatimenow · 21/04/2025 23:11

Full sympathy here

Darkclothes · 21/04/2025 23:08

soupyspoon · 21/04/2025 22:50

These threads always go the same way, with people diagnosing sleep apnea with such certainty, OH snores badly at times , it's not sleep apnea, I used to snore horrifically but it wasn't sleep apnea.

No- Not everyone that snores has obstructive sleep apnoea. Other causes can be the anatomical shape of the nose/soft palate/throat etc Some can be treated via ENT, not all, but many. Someone that only started snoring later in life and potentially after gaining weight (not always) should always be checked for sleep apnoea!

BruFord · 21/04/2025 23:01

I suddenly started snoring a couple of years ago and have been tested for sleep apnea. I haven’t got it, but I’ve discovered that I don’t snore when sleeping on my side.

So I’ve got a big pillow to keep me on my side instead of rolling onto my back. He needs to see what he can do about it, it’s not fair to keep you up with his noise.

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 23:01

SheridansPortSalut · 21/04/2025 22:56

He's punishing her by not seeking treatment for his medical condition.

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The OP never said this.

He very possibly hasn’t sought treatment but we can’t ascertain that from the first post.

InfoSecInTheCity · 21/04/2025 22:59

I bought these pillows in the hopes they would fix my stiff sore neck, they didn’t, but they did miraculously stop my snoring from the first night and my husband and DH report that they haven’t heard me snore since. https://www.argos.co.uk/product/2729884

i offer no guarantees but it might be worth a try for £13.00

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 22:59

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/04/2025 22:55

@CorbyTrouserPress I’m sure op wouldn’t be sleeping in a camp bed and considering cancelling their holiday if she knew that a solution / vast improvement was on the horizon.

You think he can and should get help. How?

The OP has not said if he has or has not been to the GP. What if he has and there is no solution?

SheridansPortSalut · 21/04/2025 22:56

Jonismorf · 21/04/2025 22:43

Don't punish the poor man because he has a medical condition. Help and support him!

He's punishing her by not seeking treatment for his medical condition.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/04/2025 22:55

@CorbyTrouserPress I’m sure op wouldn’t be sleeping in a camp bed and considering cancelling their holiday if she knew that a solution / vast improvement was on the horizon.

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 22:55

Gardenbumblebee · 21/04/2025 22:54

Are men unable to make their own gp appointments?

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Where did the OP say he hadn’t been to the GP?

Lascivious · 21/04/2025 22:55

I could not sleep with a snorer. Why are you inconvenienced because of him?

He needs to get help or move well away from you. It’s intensely selfish.

Gardenbumblebee · 21/04/2025 22:54

Jonismorf · 21/04/2025 22:43

Don't punish the poor man because he has a medical condition. Help and support him!

Are men unable to make their own gp appointments?

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 22:53

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/04/2025 22:48

He can and should get the help he needs without pushing his wife this far. Expecting others to sleep on a camp bed because he can’t be bothered to seek appropriate help shows a complete lack of respect.

Show quote history

Where did the OP say he can’t be bothered to seek appropriate help?

CorbyTrouserPress · 21/04/2025 22:52

soupyspoon · 21/04/2025 22:50

These threads always go the same way, with people diagnosing sleep apnea with such certainty, OH snores badly at times , it's not sleep apnea, I used to snore horrifically but it wasn't sleep apnea.

Exactly!

soupyspoon · 21/04/2025 22:50

These threads always go the same way, with people diagnosing sleep apnea with such certainty, OH snores badly at times , it's not sleep apnea, I used to snore horrifically but it wasn't sleep apnea.

Willyoushutthefrontdoor · 21/04/2025 22:49

Crazycat53 · 21/04/2025 22:04

I tottally sympathise with you. My dh's snoring was awful. I got him to go to the GP. He got a hospital referral & was sent a machine to check on his sleep. Turns out he has sleep apnea. He has a cpap machine which is a million times quieter than his snoring.

Same i have put up with it for years wearing earplugs till my ears bleed. I snapped last year. He now has a machine due to sleep apnoea and he was stopping breathing up.to 30 times a night! Night time is now much much quieter ...

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/04/2025 22:48

Jonismorf · 21/04/2025 22:43

Don't punish the poor man because he has a medical condition. Help and support him!

He can and should get the help he needs without pushing his wife this far. Expecting others to sleep on a camp bed because he can’t be bothered to seek appropriate help shows a complete lack of respect.

JackieDaytonaLuckyBrews · 21/04/2025 22:46

Jonismorf · 21/04/2025 22:43

Don't punish the poor man because he has a medical condition. Help and support him!

In what way is he being punished?