Is leaving baby acceptable

Not necessarily.

Some can, some can’t.

That’s why if you reread my post you’ll see I said ‘some’.

I would encourage anyone to leave their kids with their own dads as much as possible. It helps your baby bond with their dad, helps dad understand that he is also a parent and is capable of looking after his own kids and it retains your sanity.

I didn’t get to do this much because of COVID but DH has always taken DD out when she was little by himself and they have a lovely relationship.

For me it is entirely dependant on how you feel about it!

My Dsis lived 2 doors down from my parents when my nephew was born, and he stayed overnight with my mum here and there from a few weeks old, and they would babysit for a couple of hours during the day if Dsis asked them to.
Me? I lived really far away from practical help and I didn’t leave mine for a long time because I simply wasn’t comfortable with it. I didn’t have a night out with my friends until DC1 was over a year old. I didn’t leave my eldest and middle ones overnight with my parents until they were 2 & 3 years old.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with leaving your baby with a trusted family member or friend if you are 100% comfortable with that! I have to admit, I am a little bit jealous that my DSis had help so close by! If I’d have lived as close as she did and my parents were a constant in my DCs lives most days like they were for my nephew, I’d probably have felt differently about leaving my DCs occasionally!

Of course it's fine. You don't stop having a life when you have a baby.

I started leaving mine here and there at days old, sleepovers from 6 weeks old.

Its a personal choice and depends on your comfort levels. If you are happy and baby is settled it's fine. If it stresses you out too much and you can't enjoy it, it's okay not to. I was pressured that it wasn't normal to always be with my baby when my first was a newborn, which I don't think was fair, but it also isn't fair to make a Mum feel guilty for taking some time out when baby is safe with another caregiver.

Of course it is. I was back at work and DH and grandparents were more than happy to take over.

If you’re comfortable go for it.

Best thing we ever did was book a shit load of theatre tickets, concerts and a weekend away when we lost our first baby, we got pg quicker than I expected so we had a lot booked in from 7 weeks old.

Scariest night of my life leaving DD but she was more than fine and it’s made life so much easier as she’s got bigger.

you can, and should, leave baby with the dad or you’re creating a rod for your own back

My 5 week old grandson and older sibling stayed with me for about 6 hrs a few days ago !! My daughter had a few hours of having a bath ,relaxing ,napping etc
What is wrong with that ? Daughter so appreciative.

Whatever works for you is fine. One person might not feel comfortable for a year, another might feel fine doing it in a week. What does it matter as long as you're ok with it?

My daughter was breastfed and refused a bottle so I wouldn't have attempted a night out at that age (and had no desire to do so). A trip to the shops if she was settled and recently fed I would have been ok with. It's very individual and depends on your particular circumstances.

Hour here and there - of course fine! Dad is the other parent!

also fine to do fortnightly - only thing is that if you are breastfeeding your breasts might be uncomfortable if you don’t pump - and of course baby needs to be able to take a bottle. I couldn’t pump easily and baby hated the bottle so I did struggle with my first for a while because of this - still went out but wasn’t ideal.

but nothing to do with mum guilt - just logistics and what works for you.

No, its good to have a break when baby is so young and needs so much of your time and attention.
I was going to the gym for an hour here and there, or food shopping and grandma and grandad would happily watch him for a little while.
You can get more things done in less time on your own in those early days and its good for your sanity when most of your days and nights are taken up by baby. It was a really big help to me.
My own mum was pretty rubbish with helping out but MIL was great and had him a lot and it was really appreciated back then.

I enjoyed getting out without DD from weeks 1-12, an hour every 3rd week for a nail apt and the occasional dinner with friends. Left her to spend 1-1 time with my husband. Didn’t get the impression from anyone that this was at all frowned upon. However, from week 12 onwards I found DD much more unwilling to be left. She was BF and started bottle refusal from this point.

You’ve to do whatever works best for you and your family.

I agree with everyone saying it's fine. It really is.

I do get why you might have doubts because I have met people who do NOT seem to think it is fine. Obviously every mum should do what she is comfortable with but wow, some are so judgemental. Unfortunately I think putting up with this and learning to ignore or challenge it without letting it get to you and make you doubt yourself seems to be part and parcel of motherhood (grrrr).

I wouldn't, no. It's very young to be regularly separated from the main caregiver. An hour to the shops here and there fine, but not fortnightly nights out.

Baby might suffer distress being separated from Mum. If nights out were very important to Mum, then consider it from around 6-12mths old.

My baby was in the neonatal unit for 12 weeks so I left him every single night. We survived! (He's now 8 and I still haven't left him more than 2 days now, unless I'm in hospital).

You can pump

Have you had your baby yet?

Of course it’s fine. Why would it not be?

You’ll get different answers on the stuff over an hour depending on how people feed.

Boob fed for some isn’t compatible with leaving for more than a short period.

It’s completely fine. My three kids were breastfed and I was still able to leave them after 4 weeks or so. By 6 months or so I was going away for a night.

I think DD was about 5 days old when I first left her home with her dad while I went to a coffee shop for an hour. She was with her dad who loves her and is perfectly capable and willing to care for her. Someone probably would have had an opinion on it that differed from mine and DH’s but you can’t agree with everyone and their opinions really didn’t matter in this scenario.

I happily left all of my babies with their grandparents for a few hours from about 8 weeks old. It was so nice to go get a haircut, or see the dental hygienist, have lunch with workmates, that kind of thing. If people didn't like it or looked askance I never knew, too oblivious.