to worry my DD might be a narcissist?

Its not normal for a parent to think their young child is a narcissist. Do you have mental health problems?

I guess it depends on where you live, how often you go out for walks in the countryside and if you have pets. You have to nurture young minds.

I am not for one minute thinking she's a future psychopath, OP started it, lol.

A Narcissist is obsessed with themselves.
I think you meant to say a Sociopath? Who lacks empathy.
And that’s hard to judge from one incident at such a young age…

And also empathy for people and possibly pets is a thing. Empathy for a rodent isn't, especially since a pet cat that brings in live mice is more of a problem and as an adult empathy would be the last thing on the adults mind.

As regards it being 'funny', that is a slightly different response to the average adult but I don't think it signifies much at that age

She's 4. She probably doesn't even fully understand death.

I'm more interested in what you said to her about the initial reaction?
Hopefully, 'no, it's not funny, all life is sacred etc etc'.
I suppose it all depends on how much of nature she's seen. If it's not a lot, then maybe she's too young to process it.
It's up to you to teach her, educate her.

I was obsessed with death and dead things at that age (my mother still talks about it). I once tried to bring a dead bird into the house because I wanted to keep it. Once I overheard someone saying there was a dead snake at the end of the street so I went down to go poke it with a stick. I wasn’t in the least bit sad or upset even though I genuinely did love animals.

Happily, I don’t think I’ve grown up to be a narcissist (at least I hope not), and am definitely not a sociopath or psychopath (again, I think my mother did worry that my
obsession might one day turn into killing or torturing animals - it never did though, I was just a bit of an odd child).

I also laughed hysterically when my grandfather died and didn’t cry for several weeks. I still don’t fully understand why I did as I loved him deeply. I think kids can just be weird sometimes.

You can easily change your vote.
.

💯

Narcissism?? How the fuck do you make that leap? Maybe she has dementia. Or maybe she is just 4.

OP, do you have narcissistic tendencies yourself?

An "over-sensitive animal lover" maybe?

Helpful

No she is 4 and you aren’t

She doesn’t really understand what death is

This is high level overthinking from you OP

My 5 year old is very into death at the moment - I think it’s partly because of Easter. He popped up on a video call with my DM earlier to ask if her father (DS’ great grandfather) was dead yet. He is very much not.

I think a narcissist would make the finding of dead mouse all about her, eg how she was particularly sensitive. A psycopath might laugh.

If you're an over-sensitive animal lover, why do you keep a mouse-killer as a pet? Aren't you being a bit hypocritical? Your cat kills birds too. And quite possibly frogs. I think your tears over the baby mouse are 🐊 ones.

She’s 4.5. Her reaction doesn’t mean she’s a narcissist at all.

her reaction is fine and normal. She might just not have the emotional intelligence at her age to completely understand it and that’s ok.

I think the most strange thing is you have taken one seemingly small single episode and completely allowed it to define how you see your daughter. Bizarre.

I remember being her age and finding cute tiny mice & shrews my cat had killed and genuinely feeling sad for them also you remember almost nothing of your thoughts at 4.5.

She's 4.5.

Projecting your fears onto her and throwing around very serious terms is both ridiculous and potentially harmful.

Stop it, just parent sensibly and see a GP for any genuine concerns.

I was like your daughter, I didn't really feel sadness around death until after puberty and when I was young, I laughed at lots of inappropriate things (e.g. when my dad told me my auntie had died when I was about 5), although this was through awkwardness not genuinely finding it funny. After puberty I developed empathy and emotions appropriate to situations e.g. I still get a lump in my throat recalling scenes from Schindler's List, I cry from emotion at funerals etc.

I did love animals as a kid and enjoyed caring for them (I had two much loved pet rats) but when they died I never felt anything! By comparison, aged 24 I cried at my pet mouse dying.

I do suspect I have some sort of high functioning ASD or at least strong traits (only mentioning as a PP said ASD), but I think your daughter is probably fine!

Yes, but not because a child doesn't show the exact expression of empathy the mother considers desireable!

Not just bold, absolutely ridiculous and completely bonkers!

To be fair, my DD was diagnosed at 4. This is after spending 2 years on the waiting list after a year spent at all the other appointments prior to joining the waiting list. ASD can be detected from around 18 months. In some cases even earlier than that.