Husband unhappy about doing anything

or she could get a paying job and get savings and do her business as a side hustle until it’s viable and then move into it?

Absolutely because if she was leaving then they would no longer be a team, she wouldn’t be entirely reliant on him financially for absolutely everything in her and her childrens life. They would then be two separate parents, both with childcare and financial responsibilities.

Or selling slogan t-shirts, cheap jewellery and those bags with 'fun' straps. The market's saturated. Maybe her husband can see it's unlikely to be a winner, but will take up a lot of time.

I don’t understand all the posters who think it’s fine that the husband funds everything,works all week and then is expected to spend one of his days at the weekend doing chores and childcare? If OPs children are at school then she has time everyday to devote to her business? Like normal working people do?

I agree. I'm shocked at the replies. If OP was talking about leaving her DH I'm sure the replies would be full of how she is entitled to half the money as she supported his career with childcare and how he should be doing his fair share of childcare and paying maintenance.

But it isn’t 50/50 at weekends. He is running the household 100% on those days.

His income is already supporting an entire household, I’d suggest if more help is needed as a result of OP’s hobby then she can find a way to earn and pay for it!

If his income is sufficient he can hire a part time nanny or housekeeper.

This makes it sound like some sort of MLM. If it’s anything MLM or MLM-adjacent then you are definitely being unreasonable.

Should be be an involved parent? Yes.

Should he support your business? Depends on what it is.

I have to be honest that I wouldn’t be happy if my DH started a business that took him
out of the house refused on weekends.

If it’s some kind of crafting/MLM business etc I’d definitely not be supportive.

The things is the business isn’t making money now so it’s really a hobby. I get his point

One thing OP hasn’t said is how much time in the week is taken up with him having to do stuff - I am very sympathetic as we built a business from scratch but were earning £6k a month within 6 weeks of starting it ( 3 months prep pre starting it) how long is this likely to be before turning a profit OP- I do ask this because in the interests of fairness we have women full time working and some are the only bread winner posting on here about partners and husbands not earning for a year or two but building businesses and yet they themselves despite full time work and partner not earning are doing an awful lot of the domestic work as well - so in the interest of balance I think that has to be thought about - what’s the timeframe?? - I do however think he owes you time to make a go of something and step up

Sounds more like a hobby. When will you turn a profit? I'd find it hard to be supportive of a business that was losing money while I continued to pay for everything and did extra work at home.

He's being asked to do household duties and childcare mainly on the weekend, which he should have been doing anyway? Being a SAHM shouldn't be a 24/4, 365 day a year job, it's childcare for when her DH is working - he still should be pulling his weight when he's home.

YANBU OP and I fully agree with you - don't give it up!

Why is he so mad about it, exactly? Did you never get any “me time” before?

God come on, if you have school age children then of course you have plenty of free time during the week. Between the hours of 9 & 3 your time is entirely your own, and that is absolutely your downtime.

When is her time, is it whilst they’re in school? Her DH seems to think that time is also for domestic labour, given he wants to do 0, so her only time is the scraps left after she’s met everyone else’s needs which is ridiculous.

Her FT job is stay at home mum (50-60 hours max) and everything else is their joint responsibility including weekends, etc. If she wants to use some of her free time on the weekend for her business or she can’t meet everyone’s needs within 50 hours, he needs to step up.

Most people don't say they were fortunate to be able to do something if they didn't want to do it and then further justify doing.

So that.

But would he happily fund the household so I could do hobbies?

Luckily for me, when I was a SAHM for 10 years, my husband funded the household AND my hobbies which eventually allowed me to open a not for profit business teaching kids martial arts.

I expect because my husband isn't an arse and wanted me to be happy. I'm sorry that your husband wouldn't be the same..

Why do you think she was a SAHM “because she wanted to”

Where have you read that? As opposed to a decision made by the couple for the benefit of their household at the time?

He wouldn’t have been able to outsource anything. He would still need to share in cooking or manage the household on the odd weekend.. Few people outsource all of that.

This is ridiculous - as a SAHM you are responsible for kids/house while the husband is working, but at weekends all of that should be split 50:50. He should be doing it anyway, regardless of if she is bringing money in.

Look at it as percentages.

While she’s a SAHM I’d call that 50/50, one picks up the finances, one picks up the practical. At the point OP is doing a hobby, bringing in £0, and requiring him to also do the practical bit those scales have tipped. Now it’s 70/30, and without his agreement, that’s not fair.

Hence my saying if it’s earning money, it’s still fair. It’s 50/50, she’s doing less but she’s also bringing in financially.

The business has yet to turn a profit but it’s still early days

This is the crux.

I have some sympathy with him. You have a hobby job that's costing the family time and money and he's having to do more to make it happen.

If the business is on the cusp of making serious money then YANBU. If it's a hobby job selling tat at craft shows that's never going to be worth the effort then YABU.

I suspect the latter, and I don't blame DH.