Why do some women not like their husbands?

Yeah…that’s really nice for you, OP. I don’t like spending time with my husband because he is no fun, no company and no help. He is anxious, depressed and obsessed with himself. He is his only topic of conversation. He wasn’t always this bad but it has gradually become worse over the years. I’ve been with him for 16 years and we have a 12 year old DC. I say “we” but I’m solely responsible for her and for everything else. I couldn’t leave him because then she’d be obliged to spend time with him and I wouldn’t do that to her. But so nice to hear that you married your best friend.

I read your thread last week and I'm so sorry you're going through this! Hope you and the children had the best Easter you could, you've got this!!

Can I arrange him a blind date with my ex wife, it sounds like a perfect combination?

Yes this. Mine became an absolute arsehole after marriage and made my life a misery. He certainly didn't start off that way or I wouldn't have married him.

My oldest son is now 24

DW & I have a 15 & 16 year old

Its great, we have someone who can be the 'Responsible Adult' on the hairy dangerous things like the bloody enormous zip wire at Blaenau Ffestiniog - in the rain while we sit in the cafe..........

today is Easter Sunday and I couldn’t fathom not being with my husband and children

When I was married Easter Sunday was no more, or less, important than any other day. We may have spent it together or not, but that had no bearing whatsoever on the state of our relationship.

And when I was on day trips with the kids they had most enjoyment when their friends were there ie the children of my friends. So we went with them mostly. If my husband was desperate to visit the zoo, or playground, or National Trust house with cafe and playground, he was obviously welcome to come too. But he bonded with them doing other things. And my friend/s also enjoyed doing these things with their children. So we went together.

I find it very strange and judgemental of you to judge the state of your friends relationships like this.

When it comes to relationships I was always told it was -

Dont put all your eggs in one bastard

Not everybody gets a fairytale life and a happy ever after. If your husband is your best friend you are very lucky, but not everybody will meet somebody to marry who is also their best friend. Some women will settle for a man who just ticks enough boxes over taking the risk of waiting for the perfect soulmate but potentially staying single and missing the opportunity to have children if they wait too much longer. There’s no guarantee that everybody will be able to find a partner who is also their best friend, not everybody will get that kind of relationship even if they want it and even if they search for it. Surely that’s not hard to understand?

I agree.

Oh my God. That’s desperate I’m sorry.

i was just wanting to say that some husbands do not want to spend time doing ‘family things’ and their wives just have to make the best of it.
Thats why.

I’m sure most wives would love to be spending fun times with their husbands and families but that’s not how it ended up.

If most people did this marriage rates, heck even relationship rates would plummet.

Your friends sound like they are in unhappy marriages. It’s even possible they are abusive marriages.

I don’t know why you need to be so faux doe eyed innocent about this.

Its surely not a big surprise that not everyone has a good marriage like yours

@mydogisthebest

Totally disagree. Of course your husband/wife should be your best friend. They should be the person you most want to spend time with, the person you get on best with etc.

Until they stop being your best friend....

Cynicism aside, I don't disagree that your spouse should be your best friend. But anyone who assumes that this means they don't need anyone else in their life is an idiot. Firstly because there are no guarantees they will always be around. Secondly because in a long partnership there will always be peaks and troughs. But probably more importantly because everyone needs more than one close person in their lives.

I couldn’t fathom

You're clearly not very deep.

GET IT?!??! I love a good pun.

My now ex husband was an abusive cunt. HTH @whatsausername

Totally disagree. Of course your husband/wife should be your best friend. They should be the person you most want to spend time with, the person you get on best with etc.

I would not have bothered marrying DH if he had not been my best friend and, 45 years later, he still is

I am. I have. I’d still pick my husband. It can work.

Although I can also understand it’s not the same for everyone.

My husband was my best friend till he went out and sex with a man he found online.

He told me a week ago BTW, it's been a shite Easter for me and the kids

Well my ex didn't want to spend time with his children or me so we had to go out with friends/family. HTH.

I can quite imagine many women with their friends and kids wanting to celebrate the fun aspects of Easter together as many husbands would rather watch the racing or paint the skirting boards in the spare room.
Sadly, no matter how fun and sexy your husband once was, he will turn into a whinging dad who thinks every activity (apart from the pub) is a rip off and constantly goes on about lights being left on 😬

I have been married 45 years (no children which helps) and we are still very happy.

I think lots (far too many) women are so desperate for children they marry without giving it enough thought. So no wonder so many marriages don't work out

Obviously but most don’t marry immediately after dating. If you marry at 28 usually youve been with someone since your early 20s… in my case since I was a teen and married before 28. I definitely grew up with my husband and that shared history is very, very important to see you through the tough times in life.

I think it deoends on the couple and also how they are as individuals, I've never been able to have the kind of relationship where you live in each other's pockets as I really value(/need) independence. Plus since COVID me and my DH both WFH so I see him all the bloody time 😂 and then he's a homebody and I like going out and about, so often I will take the kids out with a friend and their kids(s) while he does stuff at home, and it's fine. It doesn't mean we don't like spending time together, just we do what works for us and keeps everyone happy/sane 😅

You are very lucky to be the perfect wife to your perfect husband and you can’t get enough of each other.

You must be really grateful and appreciative because it is unusual.

Could you genuinely not have worked this answer out for yourself?

"Thinking is difficult, that's why most people judge" - Carl Jung