Why do some women not like their husbands?

My H is my best friend. Like friends we sometimes disagree. At the moment we’re doing significant home improvements, quite stressful, so have been bickering a bit. 🤷🏻‍♀️ it happens…. We make a real effort (and it is a real effort when you’re pissed off and feeling like you’re doing the lions share of work) to communicate openly and honestly. Couples grow and evolve through a relationship and sometimes they don’t grow together, so they grow apart instead and what seemed like a small issue once is now a great big fissure and that breeds resentment. It happens.

Or couples realise they shouldn’t be together but because of young kids, mortgages, sunk cost fallacy, they decide to stick at a failing relationship and end up not really liking each other.

My husband can annoy the bejesus out of me and we have never shared a bathroom or an office (we work together) but he is my absolute base point. We have been together over 20 years now and the reality is anyone else has their own life but we are entwined 100%.

Saying that my daughter has declared (at the age of 14) that she will never have a partner beyond a boyfriend and certainly no children cos that will absolutely get in her way of her career choices, My response was absolutely 100%, you don't need to be attached to anyone and you must not be financially reliant. I am responsible for all investment decisions in our family (including the kids) and she is already learning from me now. Saying that though, there is an element of security she has just knowing that our priority is just the nuclear family.

I have been married 20 years with 2 kids and I still love my DH as much as I did when I met him. He is my best friend and I love spending time with him. 😏

Or they don't want to be single

Some women end up with men who are not interested in their own children and don't hide it. Don't want to go on family outings, don't care about making Christmas or Easter feel special, don't want to do birthday parties or any of the stuff of parenthood. My Dad was like this and now I'm watching one of my friends go through the same thing. She shops, eats, holidays etc alone or just with the baby, DH lives in his own world. Some women can't leave easily because they are trapped financially or the kids are too young and whatever. It's grim.

But then he's your ex after that

You've basically reposted the same thing!

People change, relationships change.

I too once thought my husband was wonderful.

Until I found out he was a lying cheat (huge understatement and has committed fraud).

What you gonna do?

Maybe there is stuff you don't know. Maybe their husbands aren't as wonderful as yours?!

Trust me, a lot of men don’t like their wives either! They stay for the kids or financial reasons

I’d have said that after 5 years too love.

I think you're getting a hard time on this thread OP, quite unfairly. I understand what you were asking - it's a legit question.

I also feel sad for the amount of people who think it's impossible to still enjoy spending time with your husband after 10+ years.

I have been married for 42 years and still live my DH to bits, he is my best friend. But I also have 3 friends I have known as long, who have been there for me through good times and the worst, whom I would trust with my life. We laugh, affirm each other and can say anything to each other without being misunderstood. If anything happens to me or DH or my children they will be there for me. Women need other women as well as their husbands, I believe it's always been so. If I get the chance I'm off to lunch with them.

Can I blow your mind OP? Today my DH went out with HIS friends with our/their respective kids for the day whilst I thoroughly enjoyed myself having a bath, doing some hobbies, pottering around the house etc. Now what does that say about the state of our relationship to you?

Women (and men) who don’t value or maintain their friendships and wider family relations when in a romantic relationship seem like sad-sacks to me but each to their own.

Your life seems very small tbh.

I enjoy the company of my DH, it doesn't mean I will always choose spending time with him over and above spending time with my friends. I need both to make my glass full.

Not spending time with him just makes those times I do spend with him even more special.

And women definitely do NOT change at ALL.
Cool.

Give it time, people change, life changes us. Stress, loss be that jobs, money or the loss of bereavements, illness, be it physical or mental can take its toll on any relationship. Some weather the storms of life, some don't. My marriage did not withstand the upheaval of out baby's arrival and me being physically ill and also suffering from PND. Similar thing happened to a friend of mine. In fact out of all the couples I know from this time only 2 out of the 10 are still together

I am like you and find it super weird too . I think people just have different ways to live or different values and also plenty of marriages are simply a farce with love long gone

Because they have friends

That’s two entirely different things
Someone who wants to have family says together
and those who are in very unhappy relationships

they're not synonymous…..yes I adore my husband and he’s my no 1 fan but yes he can also irritate me to high heaven…does t mean I don’t love him and hate being in his company…..

I love my husband, but he isn't the same as a best friend. I wouldn't want him to be my bestie tbh. I'm happy with a bit of mystery there and I think he is too.

Errrrr

i mean I love my husband and I’m incredibly happily married and I love spending time with him

however, I can and do spend time with other people with also…..

it doesn’t mean I don’t love my husband and want to ravish him constantly. It means I am a level headed human being.

Do you have children OP?

PEOPLE CHANGE

And sometimes those people are stuck and try to make the best of it.

Oh come on! Cushions are fantastic!

For lots of people Sundays and bank holidays are the only time they get to do some of their hobbies- stuff that takes a whole half day or longer. If I do an art workshop, or my OH goes sailing, the other of us is alone, so might well invite a friend to do something together.

Maybe the parents are having a day each to themselves over the bank holiday weekend. Maybe one works shifts and is working today, so the other is hanging out with a friend instead.

Why does it have to be that they don’t like each other? Every relationship is different.