"Ipad Kid" ??

Agreed. The "is it just me" posts are so yawnsome.

“Safe and nourished” is quite literally the bare minimum

Oh I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it whatsoever. I just meant that we find it easier and the children more settled if we provide no ‘entertainment’ while eating out.

I’m in a similar position, with my eldest she sat nicely etc and i would sit pretty smugly (to my now eternal shame) then I had ds who has brain damage and is most likely autistic (he’s still quite little) and yes an iPad is often the only way to get through an activity out of his routine, he’s laid under the trolley at the supermarket, howled his head off getting in the car seat etc. should I not leave the house? Should I shout and scream back at him til he obeys? Or should I help him stay calm and access this other activities wit his iPad and then remove it as he becomes more comfortable

"I cannot stand anyone being on iPads or iPhones during meals at home or out in restaurants."

How is it bothering you if the sound is off. Surely you wouldn't notice if you were concentrating on the people you were with.

YANBU OP.

I cannot stand anyone being on iPads or iPhones during meals at home or out in restaurants. It is incredibly bad mannered, both to the people you are with and others around you. I noticed recently a man blaring music from his phone sitting outside a pub restaurant- a good song actually 😂 but I did wonder why he couldn’t use headphones?

I take my own children, who are 3 and 6, out to cafes/restaurants regularly, and I have never allowed this. I didn’t allow any iPad use at all even at home until my son was asked to use some Maths apps for homework in Year 1.

How on earth do my children cope without them in restaurants? 😂 Like I did- they have a colouring book and actually talk to their family. I have taught them questions to ask others to show interest, and they understand recent news to share, things they’ve been doing, etc.

This is not being judgmental, this is having high standards of your behaviour, and children will certainly rise to this.

The world has gone to shit. It really has.

I have no problem with a child on screen in a restaurant. Rather that than them running up and down the place like a lot of kids do.
I do think sounds should be turned down though.

I dread to think what the world's going to be like in 10 years when we are flooded with adults who have never been taught to regulate boredom.

Saw on another thread a parent blaming her son's bad behaviour at school on some of his teachers not being interesting enough. It's not going to go down well when he has an actual job if he starts acting up whenever he isn't enjoying himself!

No excuses for it. Stop with the exhausted parents rubbish. News flash - we’re all exhausted parents. Deal with it! Baring any severe SEN needs (mum of child with SEN), there is no excuse. You wanted kids, raise them. You sit and chat and engage with your children. It’s how they learn to grow and develop social skills.

We’ve had to move tables before now because a large group of adults allowed their young kids free rein to watch Peppa Pig at the table (must have been 8pm too). There were at least six of them and the parents had just pushed them to one end (next to us) so they could enjoy their evening.

Another time, in a lovely restaurant. Out for a romantic meal and we had three kids sat practically on our feet for watching their iPad while their parents sat the other end of the table.

I’ve taken to littering my conversation with swearing. It’s great for kids to expand their vocabulary 😬 parents quickly pop on headphone or actually take them home!

I think it's unreasonable to judge the use of screen - you don't know the circumstances and that's only a snapshot of their day/life.

It's NOT unreasonable however to ask for the sound down. That's such a nuisance! We used headphones or sound off.

It’s really sad. Colouring in costs just paper and crayons but I’ve not seen kids doing this for years. I saw a kid on his dad’s shoulders out for a walk watching a cartoon on an iPad. I thought poor kid missing out. It’s the same for iPads in cars, trains etc for travel there’s a disconnection to the experience and to drawing, reading, conversation - even for toddlers.

Reasonable request, headphones or even low volume. I doubt the phone call was to make arrangements or had to be at the time it was.

Unfortunately with low margins in many parts of hospitality, the option of not serving such parents is not realistic.

And do you offer to pay the bill for all the people whose meal you ruined by allowing your child to disrupt the atmosphere with their noisy screen for that hour?

My eldest is autistic and my youngest has ADHD. We have never used screens at a restaurant but I get there is different spectrums and parenting. However my eldest gets totally overstimulated when he can hear the tinny noise coming from a nearby device constantly. Doesn't matter if it is quiet or loud. He gets really distressed. Happens all the time in restaurants and public transport. People just don't care though. As long as their child is fine it doesn't matter what they put other people through and ruining their experience.

To be fair it isn't just children. The other day I was out with my sister who has down syndrome, my eldest who is autistic and my toddler nephew on a long train journey. They all has a device to keep them occupied. I ensured all had sound off/headphones and there were two people near us, someone in late teens/early 20s and another in their 40s with their phones on loud watching what I assume were tik toks with swearing in. Just no respect for anyone else.

Usually we don’t use screens either at home or out while eating, but it’s nice to occasionally have an extra option of something for the children to do, if it were needed. You never know, the parents might have been up since 5am playing non stop with the toddler and just need a few minutes! (Headphones always though imo)

I knew someone would say this, first reply no less!

If this is serious, the answer is that you don't take him to restaurants.

It has never escalated to screens for us. What’s wrong with a bit of colouring in whilst waiting for dinner…!? It’s not the same as at home - it’s a much longer wait to order, wait for food, wait for dessert etc where mine can eventually get a bit antsy so we bring colouring for them to do whilst they’re waiting (and chatting to us!)

It’s absolutely not unreasonable to expect a child to behave and have manners. We have be taking our daughter out for meals since she was a toddler and we have always expected her to behave. She is 10 now and ofcourse knows to behave in a restaurant but even at 3-4 she knew not to run around, make noise and disturb others as we made our expectations very clear. Other dinners want to relax too and not be disturbed and we always felt it was our responsibility to ensure our daughter did not disturb others enjoyment of their meal.

As much as I don't agree with the IPad situation especially when you can hear the sound. I would much rather that than a entitled dog owner with a dribble dog under the table. Toddlers are humans and annoying habits from them/ the parents is at least part of human behaviour!

If the only way they can go to normal things as a family is to use electronic devices with the sound on and ruin things for everyone else, they can't go to normal things as a family.

We were on holiday a few weeks ago and went to a restaurant. A family near us all had their faces stuck in their phone the whole dinner. (Except the granny)

The dad was literally hunched over his soup and had his face in the phone the whole time. The two kids had their faces kn their phone couldnt see the mum. But the granny was just sitting there with nobody talking to her. Couldnt believe they would invite her on holiday and just ignore her. I could never ignore my two grannys like that when they were alive.

Not high season so only a few tables so highly noticable that we were the only ones talking at the table.

And across the way were a couple with their little baby. Baby had ipad and both parents heads in phone.

Sad state of affairs.

How on earth did we all manage to sit around a table and eat before screens were invented? Those of you who use tech to parent your children - what would you do if screens didn't exist? The whole 'my child needs it to regulate/be entertained' nonsense wouldn't apply if you hadn't ever given them screens in the first place.

Now, with the kids at age 3 and 2 we can go out for a meal without having to resort to a screen but we absolutely used them when they were younger and all else failed (on silent). Sometimes, it was the only way to finish the meal without a 1 year old screaming the restaurant down. It’s got easier the older and chattier they’ve got and I don’t regret it because they are generally really good kids in a restaurant these days.