I am being made to feel bad for working part time with young kids

It’s all well and good her having that attitude until divorce and she needs to head out to work standing on her own two feet. However due to a long career break, she is not skilled for employment nor has she built up a substantial pension to live off in old age. In this day and age of high divorce rates, I would be uncomfortable relying on a man to provide the income for the rest of my life

I’d pop that view in the box alongside non-parents judgement of parents choices in food, screen time etc.

@Chocstrawberry1

This post OP.

You do You. Childcare costs are temporary and Pension contributions are worth more the earlier they are put in.

She on the other hand can stop working if she likes. Life is long and unpredictable.

Nod, ignore and please don't let it get to you - It's a marathon not a sprint.

Tell her to bore off.

Shes not even got children so how the fuck would she know how she would feel.

Appalling behaviour from your sister, who seems to lack the ability to climb out of her own Jimmy Choos into the Clark's of others. My DD went to nursery three days a week from seven months and thrived. At a family dinner, my high earning DB with a stay-at-home wife made the following pompous pronouncement: 'I wasn't having any child of mine being a nursery child.' I gave him a gob-full (no swear words) on the spot. Please do the same for your unsisterly sister 😡

Remind her that this is the 21st century and suggest to her that she would be setting a really bad example to her children if she were to go trad wife.

Or tell her to mind her own fucking business and keep.her (poor) opinions of your husband and your choices to herself.

Tbf sometimes it doesn't make sense to work because you pay all in chilcare.

Your sister is a total bitch

Tell her you would never make yourself entirely financially dependent on a man.

I think it's fine to have that preference for yourself and your own family but that's not an excuse to judge others for a different decision. I'd ask her to keep her opinions on this to herself.

I think both parents working creates positive role models for the DC regardless of financial situation. Your DC need to grow up understanding relationships are equal partnerships and that it's important for women to have financial independence.

Your sister might have a different perspective but she's putting herself (and potentially her children) in a vulnerable situation if her marriage breaks down or her partner can no longer work.

Tell her it’s important to you to remain financially independent and not be reliant on a man for your income.

Alternatively, just tell her to bore off and that she’s being offensive and unpleasant.

Yes.

She needs a reminder that words have impact.

You may want to gently point out that some people might judge her husbands employment to be unethical, that mothers who don’t work set a poor role model to their children, that some can’t afford to work and need to for their health and well being. And crucially, that all circumstances are different but being judged and made to feel guilty doesn’t do anyone any good. And maybe have a think on the example she sets her nieces/ nephews on that front.

You aren't being made to feel bad unless you're prepared to give her ridiculous comments headspace.

Tell her that the 1970's want her opinions back and then how sad it is that she's prepared to sponge off her husband whilst showing a complete lack of ambition and setting back her chance of a decent career (and the money/pension that goes with it). I'd be ashamed to think like her.

I personally wouldn't be talking to her at all after she's been so nasty about you and your H.