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AIBU?

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Original poster

Aibu about these photos?

93 replies

Isitbedtimeyet101 · 19/04/2025 17:21

Mil keeps giving us photos in frames presumably to put up in our house.

The photos are of dh when he was a baby. Dh winning a trophy when he was about 12. Dh at a festival when he was about 18 before I knew him. Sil (dh’s sister) wedding photos.

Aibu to think this is very weird and not want to put these photos up in our house? I only want phones of my own children, me and dh. Dh wants to put his baby photos up.

Another thing, dh mum gave him a box of his old baby/childhood stuff and there is an old child’s character blanket from when he was a kid. He wants to put it on our bed instead of the throw.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 15:08

Ihopeyouhavent · 20/04/2025 14:43

I have photos of myself as a small child in frames in our house. I dont understand why people find it strange?

To be fair I think most people have said it’s not strange. I do take this on board.

I love old photos but I don’t want to look at photos of my husband as a baby in a nappy or in the bath with his sister on my mantlepiece, or have his baby blanket on our bed.

It gives me the complete and utter ick.

But I do accept I am in the minority.

OP posts:
Ihopeyouhavent · 20/04/2025 14:43

I have photos of myself as a small child in frames in our house. I dont understand why people find it strange?

Barrenfieldoffucks · 20/04/2025 14:25

We have some photos of us as kids around the house, why wouldn't we? The kids like seeing them too, it's where they came from. History, heritage etc etc.

Blanket I would take and put in a memory box type thing.

faerietales · 20/04/2025 14:22

Clearly I'm a right weirdo judging by this thread, but I honestly can't see any issue with having photos of yourself as a child around the house? I have a couple of me with my grandparents in our bedroom and I'd honestly be really upset if DH said he didn't want them around.

I also still have my baby blanket and often use it on the sofa as it's soft and cosy.

When I visit my parents they have all sorts of photos up - pictures of them as children, of me as a child, of them with their parents/my grandparents, wedding photos of me and DH, even some photos of my dog Grin

harriethoyle · 20/04/2025 14:06

PLEASE do this @Isitbedtimeyet101 🤣

Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 13:27

harriethoyle · 20/04/2025 12:29

I’m so sorry @Isitbedtimeyet101 but the thought of your face on Christmas morning made me laugh 🤣🙈 Definitely stick them behind things (your primary school photo blown up to A2?) and as for the Thomas the Tank Engine sex blanket…. NOPE!!

Show quote history

The best of it is mil doesn’t even have her own children's baby photos up in her own house.

She has literally got sils wedding photo and a couple of her and fil.

Her own house is very minimalist, my ds bought her a small house plant once and she turned her nose up at it.

Perhaps I’ll start giving her some framed photos of me as a baby for Christmas 🤣

OP posts:
CoastalCalm · 20/04/2025 12:58

She’s maybe starting to do her version of death cleaning and passing on things now that she has found precious - I think it would do no harm at to have some of the pictures on display , it’s his home too

EJ2 · 20/04/2025 12:56

SwedishEdith · 20/04/2025 12:54

I think she's offloading stuff. I have all sorts of my kids' stuff I don't really need. I can't wait until they have settled homes so I can carefully take it round so it can go in their lofts rather than mine.

My parents have been doing this with glee for many years. I don’t even know where they find the things they bring round.

SwedishEdith · 20/04/2025 12:54

I think she's offloading stuff. I have all sorts of my kids' stuff I don't really need. I can't wait until they have settled homes so I can carefully take it round so it can go in their lofts rather than mine.

nokidshere · 20/04/2025 12:48

Make them into a photo book so they can be looked at but not on display. You are definitely being unreasonable though in saying your DH cant choose what pics he has in his own house.

Tbrh · 20/04/2025 12:46

YANBU but it is quite sweet of MIL, not sure about the blanket though! My DH has one (in the cupboard) that I can't get rid of 😆

Fibrous · 20/04/2025 12:45

I don’t like any photos up in the house, unless they’re really arty ones, I find them cringey. Dh’s sister is always giving him photos of the two of them, he’s allowed to put them up in his office or on the stairs wall leading up to his office (which is the loft).

I am not a very sentimental person.

Totallytoti · 20/04/2025 12:43

It is his photos and home as well if he wants to display. What’s your issue with that? Also if he wants the blanket on the bed why can’t he have It? Why are you the boss of everything in the home?
surely a blanket that is sentimental has far more relevance than a generic throw ?

EJ2 · 20/04/2025 12:38

I love the idea of a small shrine type display in a spare room. Is your DH partly trying to wind you up when he says he wants a houseful of his baby photos on display?

SwanOfThoseThings · 20/04/2025 12:32

I love seeing my MIL's photos of when my DH was tiny.

harriethoyle · 20/04/2025 12:29

Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 07:47

She’s only in her early 60s.

I don’t think she was having a clear out, she gives me these as presents.

So for Christmas I get a framed photo of dh and his sister in the bath. Just what I wanted.

Show quote history

I’m so sorry @Isitbedtimeyet101 but the thought of your face on Christmas morning made me laugh 🤣🙈 Definitely stick them behind things (your primary school photo blown up to A2?) and as for the Thomas the Tank Engine sex blanket…. NOPE!!

Needspaceforlego · 20/04/2025 11:53

Well if she gives them to you, they are yours to do what you want with.
If the frames are decent reuse the frames. If they are 1970s numbers ditch!

Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 10:40

Needspaceforlego · 20/04/2025 09:40

@Isitbedtimeyet101 does his sister know you have a photo of her in her birthday suit in the bath?

I didn't realise Mil was presenting these as actual gifts, I thought it was more of a clear out. Handing them over randomly.

It's almost like a subtle message, he is mine or was mine before he was yours, something weird going on there.

Ask her does she want an up to date bath shot (carefully taken obviously) 😂

Yes sorry I have read my op and I didn’t say that they were gifts. I just said that she was giving us photos.

But yes for gifts I’ve been given. My sils wedding photos, my dhs baby photos (including ones with sil).

She doesn’t even give them to dh she gives them to me.

OP posts:
Wackadaywideawake · 20/04/2025 10:22

Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 07:47

She’s only in her early 60s.

I don’t think she was having a clear out, she gives me these as presents.

So for Christmas I get a framed photo of dh and his sister in the bath. Just what I wanted.

Show quote history

Oh dear! Happy birthday 😂

Needspaceforlego · 20/04/2025 09:40

@Isitbedtimeyet101 does his sister know you have a photo of her in her birthday suit in the bath?

I didn't realise Mil was presenting these as actual gifts, I thought it was more of a clear out. Handing them over randomly.

It's almost like a subtle message, he is mine or was mine before he was yours, something weird going on there.

Ask her does she want an up to date bath shot (carefully taken obviously) 😂

whatsappdoc · 20/04/2025 09:10

We have lots of random vintage family photos on one wall of the office. So not necessarily for visitors' eyes. My favourites are a line of small shots of FIL, DF, MIL, DM, me, DP, DD1, DD2 and DD3 all at age 2/3. I love looking at similarities etc. They are in birth order, just waiting for GC to be added now💕

Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 07:54

I take on board that people DO put their baby photos up. TBH I thought that was a bit odd. I’ve never personally been in anyone’s house where they’ve got their own childhood photos on display. It’s usually their own children, maybe a couple of parents/grandparents.

We haven’t got photos on the wall though or a gallery wall or anything like that. We’ve literally got about 5 photos dotted about and they are all of dh and the kids on holiday or on a walk. So dh has stuck a photo of himself in a nappy right on the mantlepiece. I really just don’t want to look at it tbh.

But I definitely take it on board that it’s not as odd as I thought. Perhaps I’ll suggest if it means a lot to him he could make a gallery wall.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 07:47

Wackadaywideawake · 20/04/2025 06:25

How old is your MIL, OP?

Perhaps she is consciously, or unconsciously, increasingly aware of her own mortality. This is her not wanting her memories to disappear and to live on when she is gone, hence she is giving them to you both for gentle safe-keeping. I hope that makes some sense.

She’s only in her early 60s.

I don’t think she was having a clear out, she gives me these as presents.

So for Christmas I get a framed photo of dh and his sister in the bath. Just what I wanted.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitbedtimeyet101 · 20/04/2025 07:44

ioveelephants · 20/04/2025 06:18

take note ladies! All these photos you take of your children are meaningless and some day a wife won’t even want to see them around her house 😂

They’re not meaningless though are they?

Would you give your future dil framed pictures of your sons baby photos as presents though?

OP posts: