To regret moving DP in to my house

Hmmm. Have you heard of weaponised incompetence?

This can’t be real - no one could possibly genuinely read over 1000 posts telling you he’s a sea of red flags and still think he’s a good catch. I hope it’s actually fake because no one really can be this blinded by cock surely?

See you in a couple of years OP when you’re left holding the baby and Prince cocklodger wants half the house so he can live the life of Riley.

Don’t say you weren’t warned

he answered before I could and basically said ‘great, I think shes just about gotten use to living with a man’.

Oh dear god Jadey. Just how many red flags does he have to wave for you to realise he is actually horrible? It's not banter. It's misogynistic and sexist claptrap to get you to question yourself and your standards.

Look up the boiled frog syndrome. You ARE the boiled frog right now, so please wake up before you are well and truly cooked.

Oh doing a bit to shut you up then.🙄

God help you OP, you clearly haven't a scrap of respect for yourself, so why would he?
Ah well, learn the hard way if you must.🤷🏻‍♀️

If you’ve actually been the one to point it out to him how inappropriate his remarks are and after the recent events he’s made a further comment today STILL then it’s not “in all fairness” to him. Nothings sinking in, he’s doesn’t think he’s wrong. He thinks you’re moaning, you’re being typical overreacting difficult nagging girlfriend. He’s done nothing to show you he’s respectful of you, he’s just nodding like “yes sweetie of course I’ll stop”… internally rolling his eyes at you but how many examples are you going to give of him repeatedly making these kind of comments.

If his friends don’t seem to act like this, and your friends don’t speak like this, then maybe just accept he’s the problem and it’s no one’s fault, and no one’s forcing him to have these views, and belittle you in front of your friends.

‘great, I think shes just about gotten use to living with a man‘

Between this and the blow job comment and the “women cleaning”, what a foul little
misogynist he is. He will be saying far worse when you’re not in earshot.

He’s being performative today - you’ll get back to a shitshow and I’d expect he blames it on you “being away” or makes it about you seeing family. The abusers playbook. Making it your fault, making you feel guilty for seeing family. Next it’ll be reminding you what happened last time you went to see family.

Other than his age is wrong, I’d be asking if you’re dating the same arsehole I did in my late 20s. I finally got the memo when he smashed my face into a wall because I wasn’t there to make his dinner.

He suddenly knew how to clean then? I'll bet my bottom dollar he won't be able to keep up this act, he's just doing it because he thinks it'll help his chance of getting his mitts on your house.

I'm not surprised he's never had a serious relationship before. He sounds like an absolute pig.

Relying on you or his mummy to clean up after him is pathetic for an adult. But even without that, even if he is on his best behaviour for a few days/weeks and does a bit of housework, his appalling sexist attitudes should be enough for you to show him the door permanently.

In fairness to OP, she imagined being able to move him out but continue the relationship if cohabiting didn't work out. She's now realised that the whole relationship would probably not survive that step and hasn't come to terms with that possibility just yet. I'm sure over the next few weeks as they navigate the more boring aspects of living together, some of the reservations expressed on here will reverberate with her.

Progress, but still quite a sexist comment. A one-off comment, fair enough (‘banter’) but coupled with the other comments and you can see a pattern emerging.

‘great, I think shes just about gotten use to living with a man’.
😩😩😩

As they say….love is blind!

Ok, I've lost so sympathy for you. Whatever comes next, we all told you so.

The fact that this is a point of discussion in a group of friends who have been adults more than a decade…

Have you actually taken in the unanimous posters responses?
Frankly I despair Full stop

I have my head in my hands.
The way he speaks about you in front of your friends is appalling.
He’s not far off 30.
He’s not 13.

Agree.
I know of several sisters of friends that wouldn't be told by their families that they were being used and then were all poor me looking for sympathy when it eventually registered with them.

Similarly I know of friends who had other friends who ended up with user men.
They made one bad decision after another.
After a while their friends had enough of listening to their endless whinging about selfish lazy men who showed exactly who they were early on. They insisted on having children with them and marrying them and being stuck with them, working hard in successful careers, doing all the parenting while carrying loser lazy men.

Its one thing to make poor decisions because you don't know any better, but it really is hard to feel huge sympathy for those who are hell bent on going ahead with losers despite every indication that they are total wasters.

I can well understand why friends and family choose to step away, tired of listening to it.

she is totally included. In his mind, the housework is all for her, so the blowjobs are something for him too. I wish the op could realise this is how he thinks. That cleaning his own shit off the toilet will be him doing her job as a generous gift to her.

If he was equality minded his "blow job rota" would have been an "oral sex rota" so that you were included.

Another cock before common sense, thread. 👏

Oh dear, just get him out

You have made a rota !!!! Ffs

Just tell him, "Last week and every week before that I cleaned the whole house top to bottom. This week it's your turn , do it and do it well, otherwise pack your bags and leave, which I know for sure you can do. No negotiations"