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AIBU?

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To not be impressed ?

40 replies

arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 20:57

One of my long time friends has lost a lot of weight with Mounjaro. I have told her I think it's great because she was quite overweight so is now much healthier (can walk without having to stop etc).
But.. she expects everyone (me included) to be impressed with her weight loss and tell her how strong she is. I mean she's taking an appetite supressant so she's not feeling hungry and therefore eats less. She hasn't changed her eating habits but just how much she eats (because she's not hungry).
So am I a mean bitch if I think that she hasn't done anything spectacular ? If I know a friend has been following a healthy diet and worked out to lose weight I will say "well done" because there is an effort involved. I have to force myself not to finish all chocolate in the cupboard so I know there is an effort in restraining yourself from overeating but with injections it's really effortless. Nothing against people on them, I think it's great they exist- but don't talk about the efforts you make while being on it because there is no effort when you're not hungry.

OP posts:
myplace · 17/04/2025 21:30

She’s probably really anxious about maintaining it, and is seeking reassurance. It’s a huge deal, and she needs encouragement.

Frankly, we’re all a bit boring at times. If you like her, then put a bit of effort into it.

curlywurlymum · 17/04/2025 21:28

Fgs, it is effortless. What are we all talking about here? It’s been described as ‘magic’. There is really no effort involved, so the OP is right - glad it’s working blah blah, but you can’t genuinely praise her for any hard work. (I’ve been on it myself and I know people who took it as well).

tryingtobesogood · 17/04/2025 21:27

To be fair, that is a different point to the one you originally made. It is boring to listen to someone go on about the same thing, but you did say her loss had less value because she used injections.

the injections make it easier but there is still a lot of work to do, managing what you eat, exercising more and the side effects can be really unpleasant.

maybe move the conversation on to something else if she’s talking about it again.

arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 21:27

5128gap · 17/04/2025 21:12

I'm sure she doesn't expect you to 'keep saying' she's strong and impressive. Probably more likely she thought that as a friend you might share in her happiness, and is a little hurt that you seem to have adopted such a dismissive stance. Surely if this is your friend, it wouldn't kill you to be a bit positive about it?

She hasn't seen me adopting a dismissive stance. My thoughts are well hidden.
And also, if she had made some change in diet (like trying to eat healthier) or excercise (she still hates to walk anywhere and will take the car) I think it would be easier for me to praise her..

OP posts:
Idontjetwashthefucker · 17/04/2025 21:26

You still have to watch what you eat, if she's lost a lot of weight it sounds like she's making sensible choices on what to eat...if she carried on eating junk, she'd know about it.

Good for her, you sound jealous and unpleasant...worried she'll no longer be the fat one?

arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 21:24

tryingtobesogood · 17/04/2025 21:15

Should weight loss only count if it’s torturous and miserable?

Ofcourse not. It's great that she has lost weight but I can't say well done a million times.

OP posts:
2024onwardsandup · 17/04/2025 21:23

arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 20:57

One of my long time friends has lost a lot of weight with Mounjaro. I have told her I think it's great because she was quite overweight so is now much healthier (can walk without having to stop etc).
But.. she expects everyone (me included) to be impressed with her weight loss and tell her how strong she is. I mean she's taking an appetite supressant so she's not feeling hungry and therefore eats less. She hasn't changed her eating habits but just how much she eats (because she's not hungry).
So am I a mean bitch if I think that she hasn't done anything spectacular ? If I know a friend has been following a healthy diet and worked out to lose weight I will say "well done" because there is an effort involved. I have to force myself not to finish all chocolate in the cupboard so I know there is an effort in restraining yourself from overeating but with injections it's really effortless. Nothing against people on them, I think it's great they exist- but don't talk about the efforts you make while being on it because there is no effort when you're not hungry.

It’s till not effortless. Far from
it.

arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 21:22

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Thanks. You sound lovely.

OP posts:
arcticpandas · 17/04/2025 21:20

To clarify ; I have been very supportive of her and I'm very happy that she's healthier. I have told her this several times. But when she keeps on wanting praise for losing weight all the time it's tiring. I understand this is a big change for her but it would be nice to have a conversation that didn't evolve around how much she's lost since last time.

OP posts:
BumbleBeegu · 17/04/2025 21:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

tryingtobesogood · 17/04/2025 21:15

Should weight loss only count if it’s torturous and miserable?

5128gap · 17/04/2025 21:12

I'm sure she doesn't expect you to 'keep saying' she's strong and impressive. Probably more likely she thought that as a friend you might share in her happiness, and is a little hurt that you seem to have adopted such a dismissive stance. Surely if this is your friend, it wouldn't kill you to be a bit positive about it?

LadyKenya · 17/04/2025 21:10

Your post in general seem quite unpleasant tbh. Maybe reflect on that. It is not hard to be kind, or should not be.

JLou08 · 17/04/2025 21:05

You sound quite bitter about it. Is someone that quits a heroin addiction with methadone not putting effort in? Or someone who quits smoking with nicotine replacement therapy?
Be happy for your friend and proud of her. Wouldn't do you any harm would it.

MidnightPatrol · 17/04/2025 20:58

YABU and not a very nice friend TBH.

It’s probably been a very long journey for her to get to this point, and she is proud of herself and feeling good about it.