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Original poster

How to stop being annoyed all the time?

31 replies

TomatoTrousers · 17/04/2025 19:07

How do I change my attitude? My kids are young and demanding. I try hard to be a good mum but by the end of the day I’m tired and get snappy and end up shouting. It annoys me so much when they nag and fight and ask the same things again and again. I constantly seem to make food or tidy the kitchen and answer to demands and remind them to say please and thank you. My DH annoys me too, not being very tidy, or other relatively minor crimes.

You hear in the media about families ripped apart, people who have lost children, unexpected illness or car accident. I feel so sad about this and know I’m so lucky. But I’m sweating the small stuff and risk waking up in ten years with regrets about being so damn annoyed all the time.

Has anyone managed to make a lasting change to their attitude? Do I need CBT? CBD? Meditation? A life affirming note on the fridge? I’m genuinely concerned that I’m wasting such precious moments. I know it doesn’t matter in the long run if someone left shoes in the middle of the floor but when it happens I often feel so annoyed and fed up.
I would really love to hear from anyone who has found a way to enjoy life more.

OP posts:
MarkingBad · 17/04/2025 19:23

I learned a really quick technique in a resiliance course via an employer.

Basically if life has just served you a shit sandwich from the dishwasher not properly cleaning dishes to the car not starting just say a really positive word before you tackle the job or conversation. Something like Fantastic or Fabulous.

I was really skeptical about it but it does change your mindset, you are still peeved but the shit sandwich gets a bit of sauce on top that makes it easier to deal with.

It even works if you say it sarcastically. It's free and worth a try for a few days to see if it suits you.

Sometimes you've just got to let things happen and care a lot less. As for DH being untidy, just don't do anything with his stuff. I did that, in a week of not being able to find his keys, wallet, favourite jacket, lucky boxers, that weird magical tool that is only available from Narnia on one hour of one day in the decade etc, he started to learn to put it in the right places all by himself. When he mentioned untidyness I just said oh that lot is yours, I didn't want to move it in case you needed them. Doesn't always work, he was a quick learner but I learned to care less about him losing stuff, he had to take responsibility for it.

Lindererer32 · 17/04/2025 19:21

Would also appreciate wisdom and insight. I tell myself I'm only human, make sure to give lots of cuddles/express my love to the children throughout the day and explain in simple terms why I have raised my voice etc.

More sleep would definitely help. Being tired, pulled in all directions and over-stinulated from many angles is a hard battle.

Mumofteenandtween · 17/04/2025 19:16

I was much nicer when I stopped being severely sleep deprived.

PeachesPeachesPeachesPeachesPeaches · 17/04/2025 19:11

Meditation and a low dose of fluoxetine does it for me!

MaybeItsTimeForMeNow · 17/04/2025 19:10

I'm following this as I'm exactly the same. 3 kids aged 7 and under. The mum guilt when they're in bed is unbelievable. My DH tells me often that I'm absolutely doing my best so I try to tell myself that too.

coxesorangepippin · 17/04/2025 19:09

Nothing helps

Just try to hide it?

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