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AIBU?

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Inappropriate behaviour towards my 15 year old daughter

179 replies

Jemski39 · 17/04/2025 00:07

Sorry, this probably isn't the correct chat to post but seems to get a lot of traffic and really need advice. My 15 year old daughter has a job as a waitress in a local restaurant. My exh partner knows the owner and got her the job. She told me tonight that she wants to quit, which I am fine with. When she messaged her dad, he was annoyed that she was quitting her job without giving a reason. She became very upset and told me that an older male member of staff there makes her feel really uncomfortable. He asks her questions about her boyfriend and has said things like "don't forget I'm your number one". He has also touched her waist and shoulder numerous times without her consent. She will obviously never be going back there again. But what can I do, if anything? Can I go to the police? I am so upset for her and feel like I've let her down for letting her work there in the first place. I'm going to speak to her dad about it tomorrow.

OP posts:
Iwishsummerwouldhurryup · 17/04/2025 00:23

YRNBU, II would put in a formal written complaint against the staff member. I don’t know how much the police would do but given her age I would also consider it in case he has history.
Maybe speak to your DD & see if she wants to go this route though first. At the very least a complaint. Neither is unreasonable.
Sorry for your DD. Presumably it’s her 1st job. It’s probably worth speaking to her about what is acceptable/unacceptable behaviour & that because she had a bad experience, it doesn’t mean all work places are like this but under no circumstances is this type of behaviour acceptable. 🌷

Jemski39 · 17/04/2025 00:21

Thank you for replying. I will talk to the owner, it does concern me that this could have gone further, had he had the opportunity. And I worry about other young women that will have to work with him in the future. Thankfully nothing else happened.

OP posts:
Veryverycalmnow · 17/04/2025 00:18

This is awful. I would report it but not sure how or who to. Is the man in question the boss or employee? So sorry this has been your DD's early impression of work.

CrazyCatMam · 17/04/2025 00:14

I don’t think it’s a police matter - unless there’s more to it?

However, I would let the owner know why she doesn’t feel comfortable working there.

Sadly, I think this is very common. I have 2 teen DDs and many of their friends have complained about the general creepiness of male customers & colleagues towards them.Sad