To speak to my neighbour's about her disabled child?

Do you have any sympathy for the mother of the child who is unable to be quiet at night?

No
For being noisy at night. So noisy that the walls vibrate so clearly banging on the party wall too.
They wouldn’t be chucked out for being autistic
They may be for creating too much disturbance and being a nuisance at night.

Although the neighbour and / or her landlord could try to reduce that noise and vibrations to an acceptable level that it doesn’t keep others awake all night.
That’s up to them.

Agree Butter
No one should have to put up and shut up.

No one should have to lie die at the altar of others being unreasonable. It’s unfortunate the neighbour didn’t find a more suitable property. Wonder why they moved out of their last rental……I think I can guess though.

I hope OP finds a bit of peace and quiet very soon. For her and her kids health and sanity.

It’s a tactic used to derail a thread either when in the wrong and/or a spam account. Best to report and ignore

Can you see them.
Are they salivating
Define how you see this salivating rather than a person showing empathy for OP .
I see others on here, myself included, have sympathy for OP and we also see a neighbour who will have known her kid is not suited to a thin walled terraced house.
It’s just logic really.

Disgusting isn’t it.

Kicking a child out of their home for the crime of being autistic. Vile.

Absolutely. The put up and shut up attitude here of many posters shows why it’s difficult for people with disabilities to find rental property. The entitlement of others puts them in a bad situation.

Its called a legal right to enjoy your own property
Its called protection of your own kids.

Its called the need for OP and her kids to get a bit of sleep.

I find it unsavoury that there are people on this thread who are salivating about the thought of a child being evicted.

Clearly nor is living next to the noise.
Not the OPs problem to sort out though.

Noise regulations. I’ve not come across an exemption for disability - have you?

Sadly my sons meltdowns started at 7yrs & lasted till 13. He did self regulate eventually. When diagnosed we were left too it. I was very pro active. I removed him from school & home educated him. Unfortunately once diagnosed the child has a protected characteristic. If meltdown or excessive noise are due to child's condition it can't be helped. I totally get noise can be a real issue but tbh, living with a child with additional needs isn't easy.

My son does this, it’s a really tough situation. I do feel sorry for the neighbors, but thankfully his bedroom is on the other side to them that is not attached. It can’t be stopped altogether, but maybe you could work out a rough schedule between you of when you both put the kids to bed so yours can get to sleep without being disturbed. It can’t be helped through the night though unfortunately. Maybe him in a different room might help. Please be tactful with her, she is struggling to sleep herself

Whilst neighbour complaints can aid in getting people moved to more appropriate housing, even if it is agreed it is needed, it will take a very long time. As pp said. Unfortunately.

an end terrace might suit the young lad better if he can then just bang on that wall (& if he decides that’s the one wall to contain the banging).

padded walls are noisy (& expensive).

In my experience soundproofing has limited efficacy in some houses, especially if you're not willing to drop thousands, sometimes tens of thousands on it which as a parent carer, I don't have laying around so I doubt the NDN will either, otherwise she'd not be renting a middle terraced house with a profoundly disabled teenager in. It also usually needs to be done in both properties.

Padded walls aren't effective at soundproofing. Their primary purpose is damage mitigation. I've experience of an adult autistic man who caused bone damage and retinal damage from head banging despite wearing a helmet and having funded accomodations like padding, the noise still carried and the neighbours still complained despite it being a designated residential care fscility.

As a PP upthread said no the op shouldn't have to take any of these steps herself, but this is the situation she is in.

Won't move, will find it very hard to get the neighbour to move, doesn't actually know what steps have already been taken, meanwhile due to inaction children are suffering.

Many LAs won't consider modified housing if you're already private renting, and there isn't a well of appropriate social housing out there either. Regardless of what path the OP chooses to go down, nothing will be done fast, and if that were my kids suffering I'd be doing whatever I could in the interim to make my house as sound proof as possible while I wait for an outcome or support, not waiting for various teams and disciplinaries to combine calendars, have their meetings, exhaust their options, or proceed down the legal route.

I don't think there would be as much public outrage as you suggest if people knew of the distress and harm it was causing OP. Look at replies on this thread and you will see that lots of people think that OP shouldn't be subjected to the noise and that evicting the neighbour could well be proportionate if it cannot be resolved in another way. The courts could very well agree and follow previous case law related to disabled adults making involuntary noise.

I always think it's strange that posters like you seem utterly determined to pretend that disabled people have rights that they simply don't have. They don't have the right to make nuisance noise that greatly impacts their neighbours.

Or complain to the Local Authority

I agree. My stepson’s mum bought a terraced house, there’s no good room to put him in.

We live in a semi detached house, with him ok the outside wall, and windows shut at night.

If someone knocked on our door, there’s not much further we can do.

We cannot stop the noise, because god knows if we could then we would.

I would hope that if someone did knock, and we explained, the explanation would be adequate for it to be “dropped.”

I almost can't be bothered to go into it further as it's so much of a "there but for the grace of God situation" and I have a massive chip on my shoulder about have lived that live where I was literally on my knees trying to copy with the complex needs of my complex child.. isolated, desperate, exhausted, 13 yeahs of sleep deprivation of the type that the average parent will only face for a year or so... and THEN the neighbours complained ....

...but yeah there are options. The OP can can:
• Look at sound proofing the wall her side (yeah she "shouldn't have to" but that's life
• Look at whether swapping the kids room(s) around is possible
•Talk to the neighbour and tell them how it's affected her family (it will no doubt upset her but yeah it's an option and as he been pointed out, someone else's rough deal in life is not OP's problem. Maybe they will feel bad (worse) and move house.
• OP could move house herself (no she "shouldn't have to" etc) BUT options... here they are!

My stepsons mother has this issue.

He is very wakeful in the night, and on occasion can get… shouty.

If you try to tell him to stop, he shouts STOP SHOUTINGGGG, at himself. The only thing anyone can do is deescalate him, which takes time, and try and calm the situation.

Her neighbour knocked and asked about the noise, she explained and offered to get soundproofing installed. Which she has - it’s not made much difference.

Every time a rough night happens, he knocks again, on the door of a very tired woman, and mentions it again. And again. And again.

Fortunately my partner and I haven’t had the same conversation with our neighbours. But nobody is deaf, we can all hear it and we don’t want to be up all night either. Unless there’s a cure for autism kicking around, I’m not really sure what else anyone else can do.

I wonder if instead of punching the walls could him mum get something like this?

https://www.sportsdirect.com/everlast-cardio-fitness-training-bag-788834

Which will be very hard as its a profoudly disabled child who is making this noise sonething they have no control over plus we have certain protections for disabled peoole you might be fine with it but in reality there would be a lot of public outrage.

I think speak to the mum and find out if he is doing it because he is distressed or if it is a sensory seeking behaviour.

If he is distressed, there's not much she can do.

If it is sensory, ie. he likes the sound it makes or the vibration of the wall of the feeling of his hand hitting something hard, then perhaps this can be redirected in some way, eg. could he get a punch bag to hit instead of the wall or could he get some sort of vibrating toy instead of making the walls vibrate?

The landlord would need to tread very carefully if they wanted to evict someone on the basis of a child's disability. They could find themselves in hugely expensive hot water. If your tenant is paying, and the council wouldn't be interested in the noise complaint, why would they do that?