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Is this a weird response from a friend, after telling her that we are finally getting to go somewhere we’ve always wanted to go

61 replies

WildBluebells · 16/04/2025 16:33

So catching up with two friends, I say something, in an excited manner, along the lines oh, guess what, we’ve finally gone and booked Florida, so excited

friend replies, oh, didn’t you go there last year

OP posts:
dogsandcatsandhorses · 16/04/2025 17:54

It’s your holiday so as long as you’re excited that’s all that matters.

Pickingmyselfup · 16/04/2025 17:50

No but I was absolutely convinced that my friend had been to a particular destination before so when she said she was going I said something like you've been before haven't you.

I was so convinced that she had been before, I felt like I had this clear memory of her going before to the extent that I wondered if I had her mixed up with someone else but none of my friends have ever been

ChilledBeez · 16/04/2025 17:46

This sounds like a response someone jealous would say. Surely she could have mustered up a "hope you have a good time" response.

MeAndMyCatCharlotte · 16/04/2025 17:42

Donewiththisshit · 16/04/2025 17:15

Some of the responses you have got on here are odd. You shared news about a big trip that you are excited about. You wanted to share that excitement.
my response would have been ‘how fantastic! Sounds wonderful, tell me all about it’.
Have a wonderful time and enjoy the planning!

Precisely!

Ener · 16/04/2025 17:41

Is she someone who is concerned about the shitshow that is America at the moment? Maybe she was thinking that rather than yay iyswim?

housethatbuiltme · 16/04/2025 17:39

Its a very exclusionary 'you' centric thing to bring up in a group discussion. Was probably quite jarring and awkward if it wasn't the topic and no one asked.

What are they specifically meant to say? you asked no furthering questions (although they actually scrambled and tried to but this want good enough) and it doesn't sound like they have sharable personal experience and they are in no way included in it so it was a passing comment at best not a discussion topic.

Your holiday is not really something other non involved people would be expected to 'celebrate'.

consistentlyinconsistent · 16/04/2025 17:31

Golden rule is do not assume other people will be (or should be) that interested in your life events including marriages, holidays, babies, new jobs.

greeenscreeen · 16/04/2025 17:31

wheretoyougonow · 16/04/2025 16:46

Whether you went there last year or not, it’s a crap response. I’m nicer to strangers telling me things like this than your friend was to you. Even if I wasn’t really interested I would reply something like ‘how exciting- have a brilliant time’

Haha, what? It wasn't a not "nice" response...? It was a normal response to a normal statement, and that's coming from someone who gets easily excited about everything!

Llori · 16/04/2025 17:24

But your thread wasn't: "is this a weird response from someone who's kinda got form for being someone that can’t really be happy for others" - you said 'a friend' . That mini drip feed kinda changed things.

Not everyone remembers details - I wouldn't have a clue where my friend went on holiday last year - and people make throwaway comments in casual chat. I'm an over thinker, but even I wouldn't overthink that one tbh.

TorroFerney · 16/04/2025 17:20

LoyalMember · 16/04/2025 17:12

It's a lot weirder that you're annoyed at this. Lighten up, ffs, and move on and talk about your holiday to them.

Well she’s explained the friend has form (it would have helped op if you’d given this context) . What is weird I think is that you are a)still friends and b) asking if the friend is unreasonable for doing what she always does.

nomas · 16/04/2025 17:20

Does she get to go away herself? For various reasons, I’m not travelling much myself at the moment, but I get weary hearing about other people’s travels, although I don’t show it. It’s hard to maintain excitement for the 10th colleague going to Japan for example! Although I don’t actually talk about my own travels much.

I definitely don’t do the Yay! thing.

unlikelywitch · 16/04/2025 17:19

but tbf you don’t know how she’s kinda got form for being someone that can’t really be happy for others

Her response shouldn’t really come as a surprise then. People like that are deeply unhappy in themselves so try not to take it personally.

Donewiththisshit · 16/04/2025 17:15

Some of the responses you have got on here are odd. You shared news about a big trip that you are excited about. You wanted to share that excitement.
my response would have been ‘how fantastic! Sounds wonderful, tell me all about it’.
Have a wonderful time and enjoy the planning!

LoyalMember · 16/04/2025 17:12

It's a lot weirder that you're annoyed at this. Lighten up, ffs, and move on and talk about your holiday to them.

Mudkipper · 16/04/2025 17:11

Not particularly. One of my friends goes abroad three times a year and I can never remember where she's been most recently.

WildBluebells · 16/04/2025 17:06

It wasn’t a message or on Facebook
it was in person, a friends meet up

OP posts:
Lmnop22 · 16/04/2025 17:04

Does seem a lacklustre response when you made it clear in the message you hadn’t been there already by saying you finally booked it!

Forget her and get excited for your lovely holiday - you’ll have a blast and don’t let anyone bring you down about it.

WildBluebells · 16/04/2025 16:52

MeAndMyCatCharlotte · 16/04/2025 16:47

Kind of thing my exMIL would have said just to take the wind out of someone's sails.

Have a great time, OP!

Yes, you nailed it, that’s exactly what it is ment to do, take the wind out of your sails

OP posts:
Moveoverdarlin · 16/04/2025 16:52

WildBluebells · 16/04/2025 16:43

I guess, I just know if someone told me something they were excited about in that manner, I’d at least say something like yay!

but tbf you don’t know how she’s kinda got form for being someone that can’t really be happy for others

Yay??!! If perhaps you’ve been talking about this for many years then she may have thought you’d already been.

Florida (the theme parks at least) would be my worst nightmare so I would never say ‘yay’. Out of politeness I’d at a push say ‘oh lovely’.

This is a bit like people of post on Facebook and expect a fanfare. I couldn’t care where people go on holiday. I wouldn’t expect anyone to give a shit where I have booked.

WildBluebells · 16/04/2025 16:52

wheretoyougonow · 16/04/2025 16:46

Whether you went there last year or not, it’s a crap response. I’m nicer to strangers telling me things like this than your friend was to you. Even if I wasn’t really interested I would reply something like ‘how exciting- have a brilliant time’

Yes I’d be the same too, even if it was somewhere I didn’t fancy at all
like say a week hiking, if I could tell the person telling me was excited, I’d be happy for them

OP posts:
ginasevern · 16/04/2025 16:49

Well if she's got "form" for not being happy (let alone excited) for other people then why are you so surprised - to the extent that you start a thread about it. Personally I wouldn't expect my friends to whoop for joy and shout yay about my choice of holiday unless I was 16 years old, or I was paying for them to join me!

MeAndMyCatCharlotte · 16/04/2025 16:47

Kind of thing my exMIL would have said just to take the wind out of someone's sails.

Have a great time, OP!

Thiswayorthatway · 16/04/2025 16:46

so it’s not a weird response then?

Leavemyteam · 16/04/2025 16:46

You sound a little hard work OP.

“Yay”. There you go.

wheretoyougonow · 16/04/2025 16:46

Whether you went there last year or not, it’s a crap response. I’m nicer to strangers telling me things like this than your friend was to you. Even if I wasn’t really interested I would reply something like ‘how exciting- have a brilliant time’