No show for bday celebration

Yes......I have friends who can send me shite about.....days out ya ya ya etc. I genuinely don't care..... you tell me your mum has died.... I'm there...... but they know that....

And from the OPs post she should know her friend too seeing as it is long standing.....accept the friend for who they are.....or don't..... but if you don't accept them it just leads to stress etc. Like I said its hard to explain..

@Notashamed13 but you must have a history of helping in crises or something?

Exactly......I guess you could ask the numerous long standing individuals in my life who I frequently leave unread but know that I'm there when it genuinely counts..... like I said its really hard to explain but once I accepted people for who they were it was a game changer.....I can't explain

@Notashamed13 "I consider myself a "shit" friend but one who will always be there in a time of desperate need"

how would anyone know that they could ask you for help? I mean if you're normally shit?

That's a distraction from the OP, but at least I'm not banging on about bowl food 😂

37 Bowl Food Recipes | olivemagazine

bit more than a bowl of crisps😀
I'd expect small individual bowls of the type of food in this article - maybe 2-3 per person.
aubergine teriyaki bowl sounds good.

Once I accepted all of my friends/acquaintances' strengths and weaknesses (lateness/flaky/there for the important things (crisis) etc.) I found it helped in situations like yours.....she's your friend for a reason....hard to explain... I consider myself a "shit" friend but one who will always be there in a time of desperate need.... you do you and they will do them, just don't have expectations beyond what you already know?......

I live in the sticks and hadn't heard of bowl food parties. I was wondering if it's a bit like tapas but from the menu, it's not.

I agree with what someone else says about focusing on who did come and having lovely memories of your very well attended birthday. With regards to the forthcoming party, take the no show out of the equation, and did you want to attend before that happened? Yes, it's her event, but there's fun to be had there. As my mother would say "don't cut your nose off to spite your face".

I've maybe missed this but has she actually invited you to the Easter party or are you just assuming?

I wouldn't go this weekend as you are obviously still miffed she snubbed you.

You had a party and 34 out of 35 people turned up. That is by most people's experience a miracle. If you have that many people who care about you and joined in your birthday celebration, the loss of one friend if that is the outcome is minor in a way.

I was going to say perhaps there was a reason for her no show that she doesn't feel happy communicating over messages. Then I read your subsequent posts...
She is a self absorbed arse who basically had a better offer and didn't even bother to message you on your 40th birthday. She doesn't give a shit about you or your feelings, treat her in exactly the manner she treats you.

Nope don't go. Also I'd let her know that your felt hurt and why.i.e. you felt she just couldn't be bothered or didn't even message to say she codnt attend and it was left for you to chase her. Send that message before Saturday though, gives her a chance to apologise properly so you know where you stand in her view on your friendship.

Ruder than not showing up at all without a word to the host? 🤔

Look at people's actions not their words (although in this case she was rude in words too). You might value her she doesn't value you. She didn't even call you, you had to call her.
If you attend on Saturday I would think you are a pushover and you are effectively saying it's okay to treat me badly I'm still gonna hang around.
Raise your bar, you sound like a lovely person.

So would you have different flavours of crisps in one bowl or individual flavours in separate bowls.

I'd go to the party and see what happens. You had 40 other lovely people turn up at your party.

She’s a shit friend. When that many people are invited it’s not surprising if someone can’t make it in the end. But you’d expect it to be a good reason, and them to actually tell you. To just not show up and not bother telling you, and it be because they were “busy” is incredibly rude. Do you want to stay friends with her?

An espresso is ‘just a coffee’ but somehow I suspect that’s not what you want. If you want an americano just say that and say whether you want it white or black, they’re not mind readers. Americano is just another style of coffee the way espresso, cappuccino etc are.

Back on topic, I’d go if you want to see other friends at the party but I’d gradually distance myself from her. Fine if something came up and she couldn’t come, but the least she could have done is let you know and wished you a happy birthday.

OK, so canapés but in wee serving bowls. Sounds good! I love cute food. I liked the tiny yorkshire puds that were a thing for a while.

Not been to corporate entertaining in forever - DH and I left corporate jobs 28 years ago for smaller companies and self employment. The parties I go to are mostly catered by the hosts and the last two weddings I've been to were in North Yorkshire and rural Wales, neither of which had 'bowls'.

There are whole populations of us who don't live in the capital and aren't being disingenuous to not know catering trends there.

I am sorry that she treated you so badly. I personally would find it very difficult to attend her party. She could have dropped you a gift and apologised for not coming. Surround yourself with people who care for you.

Thanks for sharing this, I genuinely feel I've been living under a rock. Or rather, I recognise the concept, but didn't know it was called bowl food.

I thought that menu looked amazing! Spelling aside.

OP she was very dismissive and rude. It’s a milestone birthday and to not let you know, or apologise afterwards, is her showing you she doesn’t consider you a friend or even someone worth considering.

Well that's a shit menu. And I absolutely wouldn't order any food from a place that can't correctly spell the dishes that they serve. "Chicken Konkatsu curry". Sorry, is that supposed to be Katsu chicken curry, or pork tonkatsu?

If she didn’t even acknowledge your birthday at any point then that’s definitely rude. I wouldn’t go to her event.

It’s been pretty standard fare at weddings, corporate entertaining and catered parties at least in London for 10 years or more. It’s more common to have this these days than standard canapes or crisps and peanuts!

For those who genuinely can’t get their heads around what it might be and aren’t just being obtuse to wind the OP up and diminish her feelings about this, a typical menu is here

www.connexionscuisine.co.uk/bowl-food-menus