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Original poster

Photo on sideboard

163 replies

Darknessorlighy · 14/04/2025 20:57

Have three photos on my daughter graduation on sideboard , tonight my partner said ‘ he puts up with those photos ‘ I said I am really hurt by that and he said it was a throw away comment . Aibu to think he was so rude ?

OP posts:
Original poster
Darknessorlighy · 15/04/2025 06:52

B1anche · 15/04/2025 06:32

OP, why are you avoiding telling us the context?

Do you share the house?
Is he 'allowed' to display his own photos?
What were you talking about that prompted his comment?

I can’t remember the context tbh sometimes he says things I think what in earth . I put up with a lot the photo comment was just a slap in the face .

OP posts:
ZekeZeke · 15/04/2025 06:50

is it a family photo with your daughter and ex husband?
Or just a photo of your daughters alone, at their graduation.
Not that it makes much of a difference he sounds like a jealous gobshite

tamade · 15/04/2025 06:48

daisychain01 · 15/04/2025 04:12

I don't think it's the same degree / graduation event.

The OP has stated "Daughters graduation , three different degrees"

So three different events.

I think we need the OP to come back to their thread and give some more clues about the dynamics between the DP and the OPs DD and what might have prompted the remark as there must surely be some back story.

Show quote history

I feel pretty daft now, especially because I cannot claim to have missed the update. I saw it and for some reason read it as angles or directions or something.

B1anche · 15/04/2025 06:32

OP, why are you avoiding telling us the context?

Do you share the house?
Is he 'allowed' to display his own photos?
What were you talking about that prompted his comment?

category12 · 15/04/2025 06:30

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 15/04/2025 06:14

I do wonder why he has a strained relationship with his kids, it's such a mystery.... not.
I think time to throw that one back in the sea.

Show quote history

Yep.

Man's a miserable shite.

MightAsWellBeGretel · 15/04/2025 06:28

Darknessorlighy · 15/04/2025 05:51

It is 3 photos of two daughters and one has two degrees . He has a strained relationship with his children one doesn’t speak to him for months at a time and there is always drama . Never drama with mine and I think I put up with all these dramas and he has to put up with some photos which I am so proud of .

Arh right, so he's either jealous of your reltationship or such an arse that he can't imagine being proud of your children.

Bernadinetta · 15/04/2025 06:26

I am also baffled about the way in which he needs to “put up” with these three photos?! Are they in musical frames that play loud techno house music with flashing neon lights around the edge? In what way can normal photos in normal frames affect anyone’s life at all (expect maybe if the subject of the photo was a person who had abused the viewer or something like that but that clearly isn’t the case here).

BCBird · 15/04/2025 06:19

3 graduations being compared with 3 marriages? 😳. He's a nob

HomeTheatreSystem · 15/04/2025 06:17

It's the kind of comment that unfortunately says more about him than you probably want to know.

Whose house is it?

Icanttakethisanymore · 15/04/2025 06:16

Darknessorlighy · 14/04/2025 20:57

Daughters graduation , three different degrees .

Whoops quoted wrong post 🙄

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 15/04/2025 06:14

Darknessorlighy · 15/04/2025 05:51

It is 3 photos of two daughters and one has two degrees . He has a strained relationship with his children one doesn’t speak to him for months at a time and there is always drama . Never drama with mine and I think I put up with all these dramas and he has to put up with some photos which I am so proud of .

I do wonder why he has a strained relationship with his kids, it's such a mystery.... not.
I think time to throw that one back in the sea.

arcticpandas · 15/04/2025 06:11

I think it depends on the context: are you talking excessively about your daughter's achievements to the point that he's had enough and the photos are just the nail in the coffin? Or is he just insecure about his lack of degrees and take it out on your daughter- in that case I would put more photos up😉

HoppingPavlova · 15/04/2025 06:09

Just remind him that you'll proudly display three graduation photos of him any time he wishes to present them to you

👏👏👏 Yep, exactly that. And, I’d stand there waiting. Then strongly suggest he left. Couldn’t put up with that.

mossymud · 15/04/2025 06:09

TennesseeStella · 14/04/2025 22:15

To be fair to him, three different graduation photos is excessive. If she'd had three wedding ceremonies I doubt you would have photos from each of them up in the house!

what a stupid comment.

Coocoopachu · 15/04/2025 06:06

I hated looking at a photo of my partners daughter......because I hated her. It's as simple as that.

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 15/04/2025 06:00

Darknessorlighy · 15/04/2025 05:51

It is 3 photos of two daughters and one has two degrees . He has a strained relationship with his children one doesn’t speak to him for months at a time and there is always drama . Never drama with mine and I think I put up with all these dramas and he has to put up with some photos which I am so proud of .

Is it your home OP?
My OH moved into mine. To be quite frank, he wouldn’t notice what photos were up. My dad never really noticed either at home.
This man is clearly resentful of your relationship with your daughters.
And you seem to have taken on a lot here. What is your relationship like in general?

Original poster
Darknessorlighy · 15/04/2025 05:51

It is 3 photos of two daughters and one has two degrees . He has a strained relationship with his children one doesn’t speak to him for months at a time and there is always drama . Never drama with mine and I think I put up with all these dramas and he has to put up with some photos which I am so proud of .

OP posts:
B1anche · 15/04/2025 05:45

Please let us know the context OP.

I mean, on the face of it, he clearly sounds unreasonable but, for example, if you share the house and he is not allowed to have any photos up, then not so unreasonable.

How did the conversation come about? Surely he didn't just make his comment out of the blue.

nomas · 15/04/2025 05:45

TennesseeStella · 14/04/2025 22:15

To be fair to him, three different graduation photos is excessive. If she'd had three wedding ceremonies I doubt you would have photos from each of them up in the house!

Would you comment the same in someone’s home?

If someone’s eyes are hurting at seeing the evidence of someone graduating from 3 degrees then they should just leave the house and never come back.

nomas · 15/04/2025 05:42

Has he moved in, OP? Or is he staying the night a lot more often?

SpringIsSpringing25 · 15/04/2025 05:16

tamade · 15/04/2025 03:43

I think it is just one graduation ceremony but three photos from the day. Maybe one on stage shaking the chancellors hand, one posed by a photographer in a booth and one with her in her gown holding a bunch of flowers somewhere on campus.
Not excessive, unless they are all A3 size or bigger with massive guilt frames and they keep getting knocked over because no one can squeeze past.

Show quote history

Then you need to read the OP's posts again where she clearly states it's three different degrees.

I'm sure others have already pointed this out. I haven't got past your post so far.

SpringIsSpringing25 · 15/04/2025 05:03

TennesseeStella · 14/04/2025 22:15

To be fair to him, three different graduation photos is excessive. If she'd had three wedding ceremonies I doubt you would have photos from each of them up in the house!

That's hardly a reasonable comparison is it?😝

more like if she had three children a photo with each of them as a newborn

But so what even if it was three photos of her getting the same degree what does it matter? It's three photos of her Daughter,

What an asswipe

FeedTheRoses · 15/04/2025 05:00

I have no idea about the photographs, but I can remember once visiting my friends parents house, after a break of a few years, and there were huge photographs of her on every wall.
It ruined the once lovely room.

WaltzingWaters · 15/04/2025 04:52

I wouldn’t be putting up with him any longer.

daisychain01 · 15/04/2025 04:12

tamade · 15/04/2025 03:43

I think it is just one graduation ceremony but three photos from the day. Maybe one on stage shaking the chancellors hand, one posed by a photographer in a booth and one with her in her gown holding a bunch of flowers somewhere on campus.
Not excessive, unless they are all A3 size or bigger with massive guilt frames and they keep getting knocked over because no one can squeeze past.

Show quote history

I don't think it's the same degree / graduation event.

The OP has stated "Daughters graduation , three different degrees"

So three different events.

I think we need the OP to come back to their thread and give some more clues about the dynamics between the DP and the OPs DD and what might have prompted the remark as there must surely be some back story.