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AIBU?

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Original poster

If you work full time, would you do your 17/18 year old's washing and ironing?

135 replies

bookworm8500 · 14/04/2025 10:52

As the title says really, do you?

Daughter is 17 (18 in September).

She is doing her A-Levels and has a part time job.

She spends the rest of her time with friends or on her phone (hours and hours in her room on her phone, like so many kids this age I guess).

I work full time.

I find myself resentful standing here for hours doing her ironing whilst she is chilling in her bedroom..

I don't mind washing as it all gets chucked in, but the ironing grates on me

Do you do your almost adult child's ironing?

YABU - of course I do
YANBU - no, I don't!

OP posts:
Humpsr · 14/04/2025 10:58

I don't iron for anybody.
I certainly wouldn't be doing it for a 17 year old.
Washing I throw on, but might say it needs to be hung out.
Similarly with emptying the dryer, it needs to be put away.

OoooopsUpsideYourHead · 14/04/2025 10:57

I haven't ironed anything for a few years to be honest.

I have a 22 year old DS still at home and I'll put some of his washing in with mine depending on the colour, but other than that he'll do it himself.

If he or his dad want anything ironed, they'll whip the board out themselves.

But like me, they rarely wear anything that needs it.

Youaremythtaken · 14/04/2025 10:56

I don't iron at all really.

I do their washing though. As you say, it's easy enough when you're washing anyway.

If you're feeling resentful you should definitely stop! She's old enough to do it herself

Bodonka · 14/04/2025 10:56

Don’t do the ironing, let her either do it or not. TBF you may find her style changes to clothes that don’t need ironing very quickly 😂

Shwish · 14/04/2025 10:55

Honestly I'd probably wash her stuff along with everything else. But if she wanted something for a particular time she'd have to do it. Otherwise it would get done when I got around to itm no WAY would.i do the ironing though

KoiTetra · 14/04/2025 10:55

YANBU - personally in our household almost nothing gets ironed, my wife is a pro at hanging washing so that it doesn't need it other than a few select items like smart shirts etc.

That being said I have always been of the same view as you, if you are doing a load of washing do a full load so if that means adding kids clothes crack on, always seems silly refusing to do a child's washing on principle meaning the washing machine is on double the time.

However if we did iron I would absolutely draw the line there and leave that to them.

Also in return for doing the washing I would be expecting a 17 y.o to be helping out with other jobs round the house whatever they may be.

BlondeMummyto1 · 14/04/2025 10:55

I would still do it while she’s in education but it’s no more work for me to do my DDs than it is to do my own. It saves doing extra loads if anything.

Rosebushes · 14/04/2025 10:55

You’re not unreasonable. It’s great your 17 year old is working on their a levels, has a part time job and a social life too. But they should definitely have weekly chores at this age. Even if it’s hoovering once a week, doing their ironing and cooking one night a week.

bge · 14/04/2025 10:55

Washing I would do, but not ironing

Eggsboxedandmelting · 14/04/2025 10:54

I stopped doing my dd's laundry at the start of Covid when they were 13 and 14....they aren't traumatised at all.
Yabu to be doing it for a 17yo..

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