To be fed up of being on a good income but always skint?

My living situation more closely resembles the OPs than your example. My husband is the main earner, I am trying to be self employed but making very little money while I have caring responsibilities. We have a mortgage, not renting.

We get one minimum wage, UC and CB combined are an extra £375 a month. So our take home is about £27,000.

We aren't entitled to free prescriptions, dental or anything like that. We don't use childcare, we get no other discounts or help.

Not so close when you compare like for like.

I forgot to add the screenshots.

They'd qualify for £896.50 of UC per month.

That's based upon two people working 35 hours per week for minimum wage, with two kids aged 10 & 8 and £1200 per month of rent.

That's the equivalent of earning an extra £18k on PAYE as a 40% taxpayer.

The take-home pay for minimum wage is £19,520.

So household income is:

£19,520 x2 = £39,040.
UC + child benefit = £13,010

Take-home = £52,050.

That compares quite favourably with the OP's situation.

Her husband has a take-home of £68,557 from his £100k wage.

The OP earns so little, that she probably doesn't pay tax.

So... The OP's family only has a take-home income that's around 50% higher than two people earning minimum wage.

Can all the people who are bashing the OP see what the problem is now?

Maybe not, but so what? They'd still get child benefit and tax-free childcare, and in any event a household income of £48k. So my point still stands that a household income £100k is less than double that in take-home terms (because of higher rate tax). A decent enough salary of course (and the OP's family shouldn't be struggling!) but not the untold riches many posters here would claim. That's all I'm trying to say.

Would 2 full time workers on minimum wage actually get UC? Seems unlikely tbh.

For years I have done an annual income, expenses list (since 1989) every January. Over the years I always seem to miss out a lot of expenses so have decided the only figure that really counts is if there are any savings left after tax at end of year - comparing year before to the latest one.

We're a family of 4 in West London.
I've been signed off sick for almost 15 months. I left a job Jan 27th 2024 due to ill mental and physical health. Last year was a hideous one.
My DP earns a little over £2300 a month.
Most of the bills come out of his account.
He gives me £600. That is pretty much our monthly food shop but I still need to take care of that money as best I can.
He thinks I should be able to still have some of it 2-3 weeks later.
I get approx £130 UC monthly.
£170 child ben.

We just about manage. We have to.
We accept help from our parents of we need to i.e if an unexpected bill pops up.

We rarely eat out.
My DP and I haven't been out on a date for years.

I'm feeling well enough now to work part time but I can't do just any job and going head on into full time work is a massive step and could affect my health in a short space of time. I can't have that.

I'm absolutely with you, OP. Our household is in the same income bracket and I'm having similar thoughts. I don't consider myself struggling at all and I don't need help budgeting, but if someone told me 5 years ago that we'd be on this income and not living a life in luxury I wouldn't have believed them. Between having bought our first house in Surrey 5 years ago (325k, cheap for the area for a 3 bed) and having a now 2-year old with 3 days of nursery fees I feel like our lifestyle is way worse than it was in the past at lower incomes. We do go abroad about once a year because my family is there so it's a priority and beyond that we don't really do any holidays. It's not about money management but about how the economic climate has really changed drastically and it sucks for everyone. I seriously feel for anyone in lower brackets with high living costs and childcare fees because it must be so so hard. It shouldn't take a high income to live what in the past was a pretty normal lifestyle. I have a friend in London who can no longer afford to rent at all despite full time work and is looking for opportunities to house or pet sit to solve it!

We have a similar income and sized mortgage and have 1 child in private school, put over £1000 in savings per month and have a couple of holidays a year, a week somewhere European and 1 trip to see family in the uk. We aren’t massively frugal with food etc and so something has got to be making a huge dent in your income that you aren’t mentioning? I genuinely feel well off. I grew up with the much less though.

Government have us all squabbling over who is rich when actually real wages have fallen considerably for most of us

Two decades ago we'd be in the m/c area with big house with DH job - we're in ex council house - and it's great but not the same . Generation below starting to get same jobs struggling to get any house.

Yet I keep reading in press house Bank of England worried about wage inflaction especially with no/limited worker productivity increases. At same time DH work place is doing what many have been doing last few years getting rid of staff and expecting same amount of work from rest - and while our parents got overtime pay in their work neither DH nor I have in it's just expected. Also read our high energy prices could be reason productivity remains so low.

Also keep reading they may switch to taxing assets - so that could be another bill as we manged though huge scarifice to actually buy a house.

I do also agree with previous poster it's likely lifestyle creep - the income doesn't give the lifestyle wanted so like most others in UK it's a case of priotising what's important. It's been a steady creep this way but it's where we are.

No point asking - the OP won't be back, certainly not with details of their budget. They are spending willy-nilly and they know it.

Our household income isn't far off that and I feel very fortunate. We've always lived modestly and got lucky with promotions and payrises in a short space of time, so I feel rich most of the time on that income!

We live in a cheap house so our mortgage is less than half of yours, we drive two "bangers" owned outright and our gas/electric/water bills are about £170 combined, council tax about £180. Our children do cheap activities (football/rugby/brownies) and we don't ever go out for food. We do supermarket type takeaways and maybe one meal on our anniversary. We save anything we can for holidays.

Maybe you need to do a full budget reset because by the numbers you've given in this thread on the lower estimate of £110k take home you should have around £3000 left every month after your main bills. I'd be so curious to look at your statement and budget.
We live very comfortably on less than a third of what you have, even go abroad every year.

OP I totally I get you! We got so sick of it that we did something quite drastic. We sold our big 4 bed house with a huge mortgage and house debt and purchased a 3 bed ugly terrace house in a different location! We did this 5 years ago before the mortgage rates were hiked up. We paid off all our debts and are now mortgage free in our mid 30s. The sacrifice has been that our house is a LOT smaller and we had to rebuild our lives in a new location but we have made it a nice cosy home for us all (3 kids - DH has added an extra bedroom) and we have a big garden for them. It’s not the picture perfect detached home but it’s completely ours and the freedom that we feel far outweighs that kurb appeal/keeping up with the Jones feeling. We can now afford 2 hols per year, can save for a rainy day and enjoy the meals out without guilt. I feel very fortunate that we took that leap and it worked out for us. Would you consider doing something a bit different to the norm?

This. Absolutely 100% this. It’s even closer when you factor in no child benefit / help with childcare etc etc. Government have us all squabbling over who is rich when actually real wages have fallen considerably for most of us. I earn more than you OP and can totally relate to what you are saying.

But she didn’t ask for advice, she just wanted to moan because what would have typically been an extravagant salary is now barely providing a standard of living that you’d expect from earning that much money.

That’s because OP and her husband are a bit shit with money. Having £1.5 - £2K disposable every month helps to provide a decent standard of living, yet OP doesn’t seem to know where this is going, or does know and doesn’t want to tell us.

House renovations are always a money pit. Most people underestimate the costs and inevitably, you always want the nicer and more expensive options. Unfortunately, these overspends tend to be in the thousands.

Even with the bills you mentioned and high mortgage payment - dh take horn and your £700 your wage a month means you still have Around £2k a month unspent

that’s the figure no one of us can work out why you at struggling /not saving /having a holiday

thats £24k a year. Where does it go @Justonemorecurlywurly

not being goady etx op - I truly don’t get where the money is going and seems neither do you

But she didn’t ask for advice, she just wanted to moan because what would have typically been an extravagant salary is now barely providing a standard of living that you’d expect from earning that much money.

I think anyone on here who earns less would agree that if they got a pay rise to these kinds of salaries they’d expect to be able to run the nice cars, have a detached house and have expensive hobbies for their kids plus a holiday. But the reality is that it just doesn’t cover all those things anymore and it’s okay for the op to be pissed about that.

Agreed. There's something they are spending money on that she knows will be instantly obvious to those on this thread as the reason £1500-£2000 is seemingly disappearing on the regular.

I suspect it's 'lifestyle creep'. People think that with a salary over £100k they 'ought' to be able to afford certain status symbols - things like gym memberships, cars on expensive monthly lease deals, regular hair cut/colours at upwards of £100 a time, expensive hobbies for the kids, pricey renovations with high end furnishing choices, more expensive clothes, regular meals out. Holidays.

The reality is that while £100k is decent it's not worth what it was, and while some of the treats above will be affordable, they won't all be. The reality is most people making financially sensible choices are always making small invisible sacrifices eg yes they drive the posh car but they keep their furniture for years and don't redecorate with trends. Or maybe they like to immaculately turned out in nice clothes with regularly styled hair but to afford it the kids only do cheaper activities like scouts/brownies rather than horseriding and ballet lessons.

The people struggling are usually the people trying to have all of it.

It isn't cheap, especially if you live far away. But ofc there's Scotland , Wales etc. But I think people over estimate the value of their kids sitting on a beach in Cyprus in the sun for 2 weeks Vs a a long weekend doing something in the UK. People are just tasteless lol

The state has chosen to target this income bracket for some reason - on child benefit, no personal tax allowance, probably 9% student loan tax for many, no 30 free hours for 9 month year olds just 15 free hours on the same basis as asylum seekers get for three year olds, freezing of tax bands. I even saw in today's press suggestions higher earner might have to pay even more for gas and electricity than they currently do.

I always worked full time so we had 2 full time salaries coming in and that did end to pay off in our case. The state is taxing those on £70k before tax a lot - highest tax burden in 70 years. Those who also pay school fees for 2 children at day school now have an extra £10k a year tax too (VAT on school fees) because they dare to put their children before their drug habit or expensive car.

We are probably coming to a point where there is nothing more to take from that group and in my view we should cut the state right back.

Income is only one part of the equation. The other half being outgoings. Looking at one half without considering the other is useless.

for example, I have and income of about £35k. I have savings and can have, within reason, whatever I want/need. Because my outgoings are minimal. Utilities,mainly. The other two adults I live with (relations) pay for food, and upkeep of our home. For big household items, I put my share in.

💯 this. I think my parents would keel over if they knew how much I earn. My life is very far away from the life that salary equivalent would’ve got you when they were my age

That works for Turkey but why are other more comparable european countries much cheaper than a home Holiday? they went through the same CoL crisis.

We are renting a gite in the Dordorgne, even with car travel/ferry, its still 50% cheaper than Cornwall & likely much better weather and locals that don't hate you!

More so if you factor far cheaper parking & eating out costs.