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Original poster

To expect coffee?!?!

463 replies

ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 07:36

I've never posted a thread before. Please be kind to me as this is extremely serious and I might cry. Well, moderately serious

A couple of us have come to stay with friends who have recently moved away. I woke up early, as is normal for me. We've been told to help ourselves to breakfast etc if we want.

They do not have any coffee in their house. None. Zero. Nothing 😱

These are old friends of mine and wonderful people, and they used to drink the odd coffee but more tea drinkers really - but I was expecting some sort of coffee available. They're probably gonna have a lot of "down from London" visitors to stay now they've moved.

I have spent half an hour googling where I can get coffee on a Sunday morning round here. The options are limited or not early morning enough. I am beside myself. Or I would be if I had enough caffeine in my system to get a head of steam on.

YABU: bring your own coffee next time. These guys are now living a simple coffee free life in the country, get away with your high and mighty big city ways and bring your own

YANBU: it's normal to expect a bit of coffee in a house in this day and age. You'll be doing your hosts a favour if you mention this, or they're going to face hordes of desperate visitors with a dreadful level of unmet need in this new, country living phase of their lives, and the local community will be ravaged by coffee starved londoners desperately roaming the streets early doors like a host of annoying affluent zombies in nice trainers

OP posts:
PuppyMonkey · 13/04/2025 12:49

So you did go out and get coffee? I can’t tell if that was all a joke now! Grin Have the hosts mentioned it yet OP, did they wonder where you went?

Original poster
ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 12:33

Hastentoadd · 13/04/2025 12:32

I got into my enormous four by four and sat revving it loudly outside the nearest Londis until the geezer relented and opened the door

The image of this in my head did make me snigger😂😂

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If you're gonna be an arsehole from London, may as well go all in 🤠

OP posts:
PinkSparklyPussyCat · 13/04/2025 12:33

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:02

Yup, exactly this. It's just good manners to have the basics in for visitors.

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I don't want the smell of coffee in my kitchen so they can have tea, water or if it's someone I like I might offer them one of my buttermint tea bags!

Thankfully we don't have a spare bedroom so no one can stay so any visitors will only have to go a few hours without coffee!

Hastentoadd · 13/04/2025 12:32

ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 12:25

Thank you to all the brilliant replies here. And to all the people who have taken this extremely seriously.....it is an extremely serious problem so that is absolutely the right and correct thing to do.

Having established there really were no corner shops, qwik e marts, or drug dealers who also stock coffee open before 8am, naturally I got into my enormous four by four and sat revving it loudly outside the nearest Londis until the geezer relented and opened the door. Actually some of that last but is made up. I don't have a 4 x4. And I walked and just looked sad and desperate for a while.

I acknowledge that I have a serious problem in my addiction, my lack of preparedness to feed the addiction, and also my poor attitude to the local shopkeepers who have every right to open post 8am on a Sunday. My friends are lovely people and we are all going to remain friends, and respect each others caffeine choices (I am DEFINITELY going to review the different travel suggestions from other coffee addicts on here and choose the best and most practical one. Or get a backpack with a self heating urn and long pipes or an IV or something)

I got into my enormous four by four and sat revving it loudly outside the nearest Londis until the geezer relented and opened the door

The image of this in my head did make me snigger😂😂

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:32

@ReplacementBusService "Actually some of that last but is made up. I don't have a 4 x4. And I walked and just looked sad and desperate for a while." I do hope you pressed your nose against the Londis window, whilst sadly surveying the unlit shelves within, to ensure you left an impression they won't forget in a hurry! 😂

Ellepff · 13/04/2025 12:31

I am not a coffee person and before I got married it was a bit hit and miss for what, if anything was available for guests - like if my brother had declared the lovely expensive pre ground guest coffee appalling and thrown it away, I might not have replaced it before the next time a guest noted my lack of coffee (see also ancient things of instant that some guests in your predicament accepted and some suddenly were okay with tea). As a tea drinker I’ve coped with versions of this at coffee drinkers houses and usually travel with tea bags.

As the first coffee drinker guest your job is now to stash something there for the next coffee drinkers and hope it is still fresh.

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:27

@HellDorado That's my point. I would be gutted to not have a cup of coffee to start my day, but I only drink another one or two cups (max) the rest of the day so I'm hardly addicted to it and I don't have a headache if I don't get my morning coffee.
Coffee contains 40mg of caffeine per 100mg compared to 11mg per 100mg for tea, so some of my tea-drinking friends who drink a lot of tea (I call them "tea-bags" 😂 ) are taking on at least as much caffeine as me a day and sometimes more.
It was the assertion that all coffee drinkers must be "addicted" to it and get withdrawal symptoms (like headaches) if they don't have it, which I took issue with, as it's patently untrue.

thelondona2z · 13/04/2025 12:26

I don't drink coffee and neither does DH but if we have someone to stay I'd normally get those coffee bags in.

DivergentTris · 13/04/2025 12:26

I don't drink tea or coffee, and the number of meetings or training events where I've had to ask for water—that thing that comes free out of a tap—and I got looks as though I was mad, almost drove me mad! I take a bottle of water everywhere now.

I would feel your pain, OP, but some can't even get water put on offer! Even if it comes from a tap.....free!

Original poster
ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 12:25

Thank you to all the brilliant replies here. And to all the people who have taken this extremely seriously.....it is an extremely serious problem so that is absolutely the right and correct thing to do.

Having established there really were no corner shops, qwik e marts, or drug dealers who also stock coffee open before 8am, naturally I got into my enormous four by four and sat revving it loudly outside the nearest Londis until the geezer relented and opened the door. Actually some of that last but is made up. I don't have a 4 x4. And I walked and just looked sad and desperate for a while.

I acknowledge that I have a serious problem in my addiction, my lack of preparedness to feed the addiction, and also my poor attitude to the local shopkeepers who have every right to open post 8am on a Sunday. My friends are lovely people and we are all going to remain friends, and respect each others caffeine choices (I am DEFINITELY going to review the different travel suggestions from other coffee addicts on here and choose the best and most practical one. Or get a backpack with a self heating urn and long pipes or an IV or something)

OP posts:
Notadramallama · 13/04/2025 12:23

LadyLucksalot · 13/04/2025 09:05

The absolute horror. Completely unacceptable not to have some coffee in. My in-laws are the same. What do they offer plumbers - a glass of squash?

I have emergency sachets in my handbag of tea and coffee. When we have to go and see the in-laws, I take a small jar and a box of tea. I would take my teapot but it's a cast-iron one and too heavy for hand luggage. They don't like it if I leave anything with them as teabags clutter up the kitchen (one box!) and there's apparently no room for a little jar, or tiny teapot.

I really hope you've found some, OP. Enjoy. And bon courage to you.

All of the workmen I've had in my house have asked for squash over tea/coffee.

I don't drink either so had bought it in specially.

Coffee is expensive to buy and then sit and go out of date in the cupboard.

Tryingtokeepgoing · 13/04/2025 12:20

Regardless of whether you drink coffee or tea yourself I think it’s the bare minimum level of hospitality to be able to offer a visitor or a guest either. I can’t imagine being so inconsiderate or unaware of most people’s preference to not offer a hot drink. I don’t drink tea, but I have some Yorkshire, earl grey, camomile and peppermint tea in the cupboard to offer visitors as I know not everyone likes coffee.

jackiesgirl · 13/04/2025 12:18

I sometimes tell tradespeople we don’t have any coffee because we don’t use instant and I can’t be arsed using the actual espresso machine for them. Have they hidden theirs away?

JennySayQuoi · 13/04/2025 12:16

@Upsidedownsides
True, but I would need 8-10 mugs of tea to approximate my caffeine intake, and I couldn't physically manage that, even aside from then being locked in the lavatory for the rest of the day!

HellDorado · 13/04/2025 12:12

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:05

Why do you think people who like coffee are "addicted" to it? Would you say the same thing to a tea drinker? (Tea also contains caffeine.)

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To be fair, the OP (albeit lightheartedly) said she wanted to cry at the lack of coffee, and several other posters have described having bad headaches when they had to go without it for too long. That doesn’t sound particularly healthy. Not having time for a cup of tea or having run out of teabags is annoying, but it doesn’t make me ill.

TimeForATerf · 13/04/2025 12:11

I think the lack of coffee is intentional, they don't want loads of visitors.

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:05

TimeForTeaAndToast · 13/04/2025 11:58

Maybe quit coffee? You might find it a relief not to be addicted to caffeine.

Why do you think people who like coffee are "addicted" to it? Would you say the same thing to a tea drinker? (Tea also contains caffeine.)

Hesma · 13/04/2025 12:04

I’m only drink tea but I do have a few coffee bags for guests.

southerngirl10 · 13/04/2025 12:02

Yes, this is serious. No coffee is right up there with no ice creams in a corner shop on a hot day. How can you possibly go on...

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:02

Matronic6 · 13/04/2025 11:59

YANBU, if you are going to host someone overnight you should have coffee to offer them. I don't drink tea or eat biscuits but always make sure we have some if people are coming over.

Yup, exactly this. It's just good manners to have the basics in for visitors.

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 12:00

BaronessBomburst · 13/04/2025 11:29

All these posters talking about sachets and jars. That's not coffee!
Instant is an abomination. It should be illegal. I'm surprised the EU never did anything about it.

Of course instant isn't as good as freshly ground, but it's better than nothing for inveterate coffee drinkers.

Matronic6 · 13/04/2025 11:59

YANBU, if you are going to host someone overnight you should have coffee to offer them. I don't drink tea or eat biscuits but always make sure we have some if people are coming over.

TimeForTeaAndToast · 13/04/2025 11:58

Maybe quit coffee? You might find it a relief not to be addicted to caffeine.

AngelicKaty · 13/04/2025 11:56

@ReplacementBusService YAmostdefinitelyNBU OP. Their negligence in having coffee available in the house demonstrates woefully poor hosting skills. (I don't eat sugar or salt, or drink tea, but I still have these in the house for visitors who do.) I hope, by now, that you've been able to down a couple of grande mocha lattes from your coffee shop of choice, but can I also suggest you buy a large jar of Gold Blend and give it to them whilst voicing the clear expectation that they should keep it replenished for your future visits. 😉 Assuming they invite you back ... 😂
(Seriously, I'd be gutted too if I didn't have a cup of coffee to start my day. 😩 )

HolidayHattie · 13/04/2025 11:52

DeskJotter · 13/04/2025 07:42

There will be local grocery stores open from 7. Just buy some? In fact, every convenience store will have a coffee machine, too.

Tell me you've never lived rurally without telling me you've never lived rurally!