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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect coffee?!?!

463 replies

ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 07:36

I've never posted a thread before. Please be kind to me as this is extremely serious and I might cry. Well, moderately serious

A couple of us have come to stay with friends who have recently moved away. I woke up early, as is normal for me. We've been told to help ourselves to breakfast etc if we want.

They do not have any coffee in their house. None. Zero. Nothing 😱

These are old friends of mine and wonderful people, and they used to drink the odd coffee but more tea drinkers really - but I was expecting some sort of coffee available. They're probably gonna have a lot of "down from London" visitors to stay now they've moved.

I have spent half an hour googling where I can get coffee on a Sunday morning round here. The options are limited or not early morning enough. I am beside myself. Or I would be if I had enough caffeine in my system to get a head of steam on.

YABU: bring your own coffee next time. These guys are now living a simple coffee free life in the country, get away with your high and mighty big city ways and bring your own

YANBU: it's normal to expect a bit of coffee in a house in this day and age. You'll be doing your hosts a favour if you mention this, or they're going to face hordes of desperate visitors with a dreadful level of unmet need in this new, country living phase of their lives, and the local community will be ravaged by coffee starved londoners desperately roaming the streets early doors like a host of annoying affluent zombies in nice trainers

OP posts:
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Livpool · 05/04/2026 13:30

No one in my house drinks it but have a jar of instant coffee as PIL drink it. If it is that important to you the I’d say bring it with you so you aren’t disappointed

UniversityofWarwick · 03/04/2026 19:57

That takes me back nearly 30 years (!!!!!). Stayed with friend in America. First morning her mum offered me a drink, but had neither tea nor coffee!!!!! She did bring a tub of coffee from her office later that day but that first morning was HARD!!!

Seriously79 · 03/04/2026 18:26

Blimey! What did the police say? 🥺. Come on OP, this really isn’t an issue.

UniquePinkSwan · 03/04/2026 17:57

It’s not your guest’s responsibility to feed your addiction. If they don’t drink it, they won’t have it in

SummerDaysOnTheWay · 03/04/2026 17:55

Createausername1970 · 30/03/2026 18:43

There is a minor zombie apocalypse on here at the moment. I have no idea how people find these threads.

🧟‍♂️🧟‍♀️🧟

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 02/04/2026 21:32

You are right, @Flamingojune! ☕️☕️☕️☕️☕️☕️

Flamingojune · 02/04/2026 21:29

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 30/03/2026 15:21

Ohhhh bugger - zombie thread. Sorry.

You know what you need dont you?

Blondeshavemorefun · 02/04/2026 20:56

Createausername1970 · 30/03/2026 18:43

There is a minor zombie apocalypse on here at the moment. I have no idea how people find these threads.

They show up in threads that are similar under trending

Createausername1970 · 30/03/2026 18:43

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 30/03/2026 15:21

Ohhhh bugger - zombie thread. Sorry.

There is a minor zombie apocalypse on here at the moment. I have no idea how people find these threads.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 30/03/2026 15:21

Ohhhh bugger - zombie thread. Sorry.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 30/03/2026 15:20

ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 07:41

This is a good plan. Emergency kit!!

I’d recommend coffee bags, @ReplacementBusService - Taylors of Harrogate do nice ones.

Zonder · 30/03/2026 15:15

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 30/03/2026 14:29

I wrote on the post when it first came out and posted again as others were still talking about it. Not sure what’s funny about that? It’s just having a conversation. Maybe ‘scary’ was the wrong word? Maybe it’s more of a concern that people get so stressed if they can’t have caffeine? I wouldn’t like to be so addicted to something.

The last post before yours was May 2025 so nobody was still talking about it. Just you saying it's scary. You've got to admit that's quite funny.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 30/03/2026 14:29

Zonder · 30/03/2026 12:39

It must really scare you if you needed to reply to a thread that's almost a year old 🤣

I wrote on the post when it first came out and posted again as others were still talking about it. Not sure what’s funny about that? It’s just having a conversation. Maybe ‘scary’ was the wrong word? Maybe it’s more of a concern that people get so stressed if they can’t have caffeine? I wouldn’t like to be so addicted to something.

Zonder · 30/03/2026 12:39

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 30/03/2026 11:49

It’s quite scary that people are so addicted to caffeine that they can’t function without it. That alone would put me off drinking it. I get really ill if I drink caffeine so my body clearly doesn’t want it. Are those of you who can’t do without caffeine not worried about the impact it’s having on your body?

It must really scare you if you needed to reply to a thread that's almost a year old 🤣

Gettingbysomehow · 30/03/2026 12:31

I cant live without my coffee.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 30/03/2026 11:49

It’s quite scary that people are so addicted to caffeine that they can’t function without it. That alone would put me off drinking it. I get really ill if I drink caffeine so my body clearly doesn’t want it. Are those of you who can’t do without caffeine not worried about the impact it’s having on your body?

HevenlyMeS · 03/05/2025 19:14

I think it's really sensible of you to be prepared
I do love my Mug of coffee in the mornings & would feel lost without it 🤗

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 03/05/2025 17:47

ReplacementBusService · 13/04/2025 07:41

This is a good plan. Emergency kit!!

I take an aeropress anywhere where I think coffee may be in short supply

Cherrysoup · 03/05/2025 17:20

Last time i went away, I took pre-ground coffee and a cafetière. I’m also a coffee desperado in the morning!

HevenlyMeS · 03/05/2025 16:47

It's just a word, meaning she's considerate & kind to inform them
Nothing dramatic whatsoever
Your feeling the need to put down a simple word choice is more dramatic! I'm just complimenting this lady for kindly taking into account, that some folks just might like to know there's no coffee
Especially Knowing numerous folk do feel the benefits of a coffee in the morning or whenever
It's always pleasant & kind to inform folk & maybe the drinks a person might choose to have, aren't agreeable with some folk So those individuals would appreciate the Thoughtfulness of their friend
Always nice to be nice & put ourselves in other's shoes - It doesn't cost a penny!

LyndaSnellsSniff · 29/04/2025 07:37

TorroFerney · 28/04/2025 18:24

I think I am sensitive to caffeine. I drink decaff everything apart from a can of diet coke a day which has less than a coffee. If I stop having the diet coke, I can last for 48 hours before I start to withdraw, if you have ever seen Trainspotting when Renton holes up to come off heroin and is kind of flu ridden and near death that is me. It's awful. On the plus side, when i have diet coke or an odd coffee, the shot of adreneline/lovely fizzy feeling from the coffee is excellent.

I tend to drink decaf but have got some lovely loose leaf tea and I'll drink a pot of that on a Saturday. It gives me a lovely feeling of contentment but I always suffer a "comedown" later in the day.

TorroFerney · 28/04/2025 18:24

ScarlettSunset · 13/04/2025 07:57

Caffeine addiction may not be a god thing but it is very real.Going without it for a day can end up making you feel like you have flu and struggling to function.
Obviously that's not a good thing, but it's not just as simple as just go without for a day...

I think I am sensitive to caffeine. I drink decaff everything apart from a can of diet coke a day which has less than a coffee. If I stop having the diet coke, I can last for 48 hours before I start to withdraw, if you have ever seen Trainspotting when Renton holes up to come off heroin and is kind of flu ridden and near death that is me. It's awful. On the plus side, when i have diet coke or an odd coffee, the shot of adreneline/lovely fizzy feeling from the coffee is excellent.

LyndaSnellsSniff · 28/04/2025 18:12

ObelixtheGaul · 28/04/2025 07:52

A few years ago, staying with a relative, they only had decaf. I didn't think it would be a problem, I mean, sure, I have 3 coffees in the morning to get me out the door, but hey, I can live without the caffeine, right? God, I felt so tired in the mornings. It was day 3 before I realised I was missing the caffeine.

I accidentally put my BIL into caffeine rehab. He drinks vast quantities of tea so I kept providing it on request. After 24 hours he says he had a headache that just wouldn't shift and we realised I'd been giving him decaff tea the whole time. 😬

DinoLil · 28/04/2025 07:59

I don't drink hot drinks but always have tea, coffee and hot chocolate available for visitors. I don't always have milk though, I don't use that either!