Not pulling out for flashing cars?

I'd say it doesn't only mislead, it often pressures people into making decisions they wouldn't have otherwise made.

Use your own judgement and proceed carefully.

That's exactly what I do. I knew I was right! Thanks Dbank.

So you agree with the OP in saying that she didn't want to pull out just because some random stranger was flashing their lights at her?

The fact that this stranger then got arsey about it kind of proves the point that it wasn't an offer, it was an instruction.

If unsure follow the Highway Code, it's what the police and your insurance company will do.

Rule 110
Flashing headlights. Only flash your headlights to let other road users know that you are there. Do not flash your headlights to convey any other message or intimidate other road users.

Rule 111
Never assume that flashing headlights is a signal inviting you to proceed. Use your own judgement and proceed carefully.

I know lot's of people do it, but it's potentially dangerous and often misleads you into pulling out when you otherwise wouldn't have.

Flashing is for warning, not for permission. No matter how commonly used wrongly.

I had some kind idiot flash me to come out from a side street against right of way during my driving test, and didn't take it - I hand-waved them to move on. Which fortunately was the right decision: if I'd gone ahead or used my own lights to flash them back, I'd have been failed said my examiner afterwards. This was 20 years ago but I'd be very surprised if that had changed.

Wow, do you really, genuinely believe that everybody showing a simple kind gesture - to potentially save you waiting for ages to come out of a side street on to a busy main road - is a 'twat'?

I'd hate to know what you would think of our terrible, disgusting neighbour who kindly brought our bin back in for us the other day when she collected her own; or our vile, despicable local dog walkers who take a bin bag and grabber with them and pick up loads of unsightly litter on their way!!

It's not an order or a demand for you to 'obey' them; nor are they guaranteeing that it's safe for you to go without you also checking for yourself. It's just that most people like things to be made considerably easier for them where possible; only a minority of people are like Mrs Doyle and actually 'like the misery'.

Neither do I. If somebody flashes me out I will make an intelligent, safe choice as to whether I accept their offer. I have the mental capacity to do that.

YANBU

I don't let strangers make my driving decisions for me.

Very sensible

I pulled out once when someone slowed down and flashed

Didn't see the car overtaking them

My car was written off. Luckily no-one badly hurt but entirely my fault

Please post again!
It's posts like this that keep me coming back to MN!

To make a fraudulent claim on the insurance, obviously.

Flashing a car out of the side road and then driving into them is a well known insurance scam. It's called flash for cash.

You aren’t required to be kind when driving, you’re required to adhere to the Highway Code. It literally insures that all vehicles are treated fairly, thus being the actual definition of kindness.

Hello, insurance company? Yeah I just hit a cyclist because I was delightedly responding to an act of kindness.

Insurer: yep, that’s no problem although the cyclist probably didn’t take too kindly to being hospitalised.

It's just a small and genuine act of kindness. Nobody is giving you orders or making out they're the boss of you. Some people seem to go out of their way to find irritation and offence in the most simple of things where none is intended.

For a second there I couldn't believe how petty, pathetic and stupid some of the these comments are, then I remembered... this is Mumsnet.

Yanbu. She had right of way and you were correct to not move. I never move for being flashed. Love watching the idiots get arsey because they are too stupid to understand the highway code.

A colleague made a dreadful mistake many years ago and did drive after being flashed and was smashed into by another car, she accepted it was her fault.

No, crash for cash is a real
thing!

I never go when someone flashes me, I’ll go once I’ve assessed the road and I’ve decided it’s safe, i can see the benefit of flashing when you’re in stop start traffic but on a normal road with nothing behind them or light traffic then there’s no ‘need’ for them to let me go, so I’ll just sit there shaking my head, I don’t care if it annoys them, they’re not the boss of me.

You observe that they’ve actually slowed accordingly and proceed if you’re judged them to have acknowledged you. Obviously it’s upto you to check the other way pulling out but the vast majority of the time drivers are just trying to help, not instigate some insurance scam as the Op suggests.

I probably flashed a dozen cars today on my 80 mile journey home today, helping them pull out or across. It’s not rocket surgery, and I think the OP is somewhat paranoid.

I live on a long road with a lot of bumps.
When I'm pulling out of my drive it's impossible to tell if an approaching car is flashing its lights to let me go or the lights are just moving up and down with the bumps. Or are the lights flashing to warn me about an approaching car?

I'm very reluctant to assume the meaning behind a flashing light.

Unless you have a dash cam how do you prove they flashed you? Genuinely my friend had no evidence he did that and ended up with an insurance claim

Happened to my friend recently she was flashed out then he hit her I think insurance initially said it would be 50/50 because he hit her in the rear but they then said it was entirely her fault really not sure why people do this?

Saying that I nearly got hit Friday there was a junction large van pulling in I had plenty of time to pull out it was a thirty road loads of distance between us and the car approaching (if they were doing thirty) I tootle off up the road quickly up to speed and look in my rear view CAR and she wasn't backing down either she was practically kissing my ass and I had to slow down for an island fortunately there were no cars on the island and I could keep going but it was close car drivers are ridiculous in my area rn

Sounds like six of one half a dozen of the other.

Other driver was probably trying to help.
they were out of order by being annoyed you ignored them.
But otoh, are you really expecting their motive to be to hit you on purpose? They’re not going to hit you accidentally either if theyve flashed you to come out; that’s the whole point of flashing someone.

If you’re so anxious that you believe a stopped driver will suddenly purposely hit you, should you be driving?

I tend to hold back if I think someone may be able to pull out safely, but I don't flash my lights, I leave the decision to them. If they don't pull out, I continue on my way.

I always let people out at junctions if I'm turning into one, was she turning or going straight ahead?

I assume she was on the main road so had right of way over you - I hate it when people introduce potential confusion when the rules are clear too. But you thinking she may deliberately ram you is a bit paranoid OP!