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Original poster

To be angry of DH fiddling on my side of the bed?

206 replies

Kukaracha · 12/04/2025 16:23

When I go out and he is having a me moment IYKWIM, he does it on my side of the bed because it’s further away from the window. Don’t ask how I know - I think most women know what happens in the house when they are out, it’s like CSI in our heads.

I don’t care that he does it as such, who does not - just not on my side. Close the blinds, pull the curtains, just get off my pillows.

OP posts:
Thedogscollar · 12/04/2025 18:11

I'm so confused between CSI, velvet embellished cushions, evidence in the laundry bin and wanking husbands.

It's like a weird game of Cluedo.

proximalhumerous · 12/04/2025 18:09

YABU to say angry "of", but not to be annoyed at/with/by/about your husband's behaviour.

Radarro · 12/04/2025 18:04

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lifeonmars100 · 12/04/2025 18:02

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Sometimes when I feel a bit lonely, a quick browse on here makes me appreciate being single

financialcareerstuff · 12/04/2025 18:00

I think we’re being very hard on this guy. He’s wanking. Fine, people do. We all know that. He’s doing it on her side, for a practical reason, not weird fetish. Fine. He’s clearing up after himself, to the point that the only reason OP suspects is that the place is TOO tidy!!! Considerate of him. I mean, ok, if you find wanking a bit off putting, then ask him not to do it on your side… but why so angry…?

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 12/04/2025 17:48

@Kukaracha I have absolutely no idea where some women find those disgusting men!!!

AdoraBell · 12/04/2025 17:48

YANBU. Tell him when he does this either close the blinds or wash the bedding, get it dried and ironed and make the bed.

OkPedro · 12/04/2025 17:48

Eternally grateful I am single

sixtyandfabulousofcourse · 12/04/2025 17:47

no nothing wrong with wanking i meant all the cloak and dagger business, him rushing round making sure everything ok not upsetting the neighbours and her putting things online about it

alwaysdeleteyourcookies · 12/04/2025 17:45

sixtyandfabulousofcourse · 12/04/2025 17:42

why is he wanking anyway

Because that's normal behaviour? There's nothing wrong with having a wank. I find it a great reliever of stress.

SplendidUtterly · 12/04/2025 17:42

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Me too.

sixtyandfabulousofcourse · 12/04/2025 17:42

why is he wanking anyway

alwaysdeleteyourcookies · 12/04/2025 17:35

Squashedbanaynay · 12/04/2025 17:30

“It’s like CSI in our heads”.

No, it really isn’t. A normal respectful marriage doesn’t leave a person feeling like this.

Or have the other one running up to the bedroom to check before the inspection. This whole thing is strange.

pimplebum · 12/04/2025 17:33

If he is leaving no evidence of the wank , why are you bothered ? I am so confused why you are angry he straightened the bed
what is in the laundry bin? Pants ??

Squashedbanaynay · 12/04/2025 17:30

“It’s like CSI in our heads”.

No, it really isn’t. A normal respectful marriage doesn’t leave a person feeling like this.

WoollyRosebud · 12/04/2025 17:30

He's marking his territory!

ICanTellYouMissMe · 12/04/2025 17:29

I’m baffled. He lies on your side of the bed for ten minutes? So what?!

YYYDlilah · 12/04/2025 17:28

Do the same to his side of the bed

SallyD00lally · 12/04/2025 17:27

You need to tell him, not Mumsnet 🤷‍♂️

Not sure what you think anyone here can do about it?

Shitmonger · 12/04/2025 17:26

Kukaracha · 12/04/2025 16:55

No evidence on the sheets, in fairness, the evidence is in the laundry bin. The way bed is re-arranged on my side is how I know, as well as belting upstairs to double-check all is the clue, when I got home.

I do not karate chop pillows and cushions on one side. Dry clean only velvet embellished cushions. I am so angry.

Erm, what? Can you rewrite this more clearly?

Something is evidence in the laundry bin (what?).
Your side of the bed is rearranged.
He also dashes upstairs to check things when you get home.
Something about velvet cushions (what?). Is he wanking on those? Is that what’s been put in the laundry bin and they’re dry clean only?

I mean yeah he’s foul and I would also be angry if my husband was wanking on my side of the bed. I can’t tell if he needs to be put under the patio or not though. If you mean that he’s jizzed on your dry clean only velvet cushions and then dumped them in the laundry bin then I’ll get my shovel.

JoshLymanSwagger · 12/04/2025 17:25

outerspacepotato · 12/04/2025 16:28

Make him wash the bedding.

Make him BUY new bedding.

Every time.

Suggest he get his rocks off in the shower IYSWIM Grin

Iwannakeepondancing · 12/04/2025 17:15

Wouldn’t care if I’m honest! You said he isn’t leaving evidence so why does it matter which side?

MinnieMountain · 12/04/2025 17:14

So he’s been wanking on your fancy velvet cushions? I’d make him new ones.

Waterweight · 12/04/2025 17:12

alwaysdeleteyourcookies · 12/04/2025 16:56

He's resting on her pillows? If he's finishing on her pillows, mind, that's grim.

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This is how it reads & yes it's grim & abnormal

hotblacktea · 12/04/2025 17:05

what a wanker

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